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Episode One: Guest Host Ayame Sohma

Disclaimer: We do not own any of these characters or the Dating Game. So don't sue us. It would be like trying to squeeze blood from a stone. And you would still have more luck with the stone then us.

A/N: The couples formed in this chapter get expanded on in the Battle of the Sexes show.

Sisterhood Inc

Presents

The Dating Game: Anime Edition

Episode 1

A Supreme Rulers Production

The Theme to the Dating Game begins to play as the cameras pan a large set that is pink, red, and purple and covered in hearts.

"Welcome to the Dating Game: Anime Edition and here's our special guest host, AYAMEEEEE SOHMAAAA!" The Announcer speaks.

Smooth Criminal by Alien Ant Farm starts to play. Ayame walks out waves to the cheering crowd and goes over to the podium dressed in a glittering dark blue tuxedo with a silver belt and tie.

"Thank you! Thank you! My adoring fans! It's time to introduce you all to today's eligible bachelors. And here they are. First up bachelor #1. He hails from Space Colony 002 and is a Gundam Pilot. He loves to eat and prefers boxers not briefs. Please welcome ... Duo Maxwell!" Ayame announces over the roar of the fan girls.

Shaft by Isaac Hayes starts to play, while the audience waits for Duo to come out on stage. He walks out of the heart shaped door wearing a trench coat and sunglasses. He sort of resembles Blade or the Terminator. Duo pulls down the glasses and winks at the camera. The fan girls turn rabid. He walk over to the first chair behind the divider.

"Next up bachelor #2. He hails from Spirit World and is a Spirit Detective. He loves to wreck havoc and has three eyes as well as three of something else... Please welcome ... Hiei!" Ayame said whimsically.

The Freaks Comes Out at Night by Whodini starts to play, while the audience waits for Hiei to come out on stage. Hiei walks out of the heart shaped door wearing a black leather Harley Davidson jacket, a pair of black jeans and matching bandana. Hiei glares at the camera. He takes a seat next to Duo behind the divider.

"Next up bachelor #3. He hails from the Shadow Realm and is a Soul Stealer. He loves to acquire immeasurable power and Duel Monsters aren't the only things he likes to play with... Please welcome ... Bakura!" Ayame said regally.

Door remains closed a stage hand runs up to the stage and whispers into Ayame's ear.

"Oh sorry." Ayame whispered. "Please welcome ... Dark Bakura!" he corrected.

Get Down Tonight by KC and the Sunshine Band starts to play, while the audience waits for Bakura to come out on stage. He finally walks out of the heart shaped door wearing a tight sleeveless low cut blue silk shirt with sunglasses on his head. Bakura gives the camera his sexy bedroom eyes look. The fan girls in the audience roar their approval He takes a seat next to Hiei behind the divider.

"And now introducing our beautiful bachelorette. She hails from the Warring States Era of Feudal Japan and is a Demon Exterminator. Her turn-offs are perverted monks who can't control their hands and only think with the wrong head. Her turn-ons are bravery, cuddling and skinny-dipping. Please welcome ... lovely Sango!" Ayame happily announced.

You Dropped a Bomb on Me by Gap Band starts to play, while the audience waits for Sango to come out on stage. She walks out of the heart shaped door wearing a black dress with a pink floral pattern. She looks at the camera giving a weak smile. She walks over to her seat and as she sits down she tries to pull her dress down a little more.

"Well my dear bachelorette are you ready with your questions?"

"Yes." Sango replies with a sigh and picks up her cards.

"The man of your dreams just may be waiting behind that wall ask away."

"Bachelor #1, if you were ice cream what flavor would you be and why?" Sango asked nervously.

"Well, I guess I would be chocolate swirl. Lighthearted vanilla and mysterious chocolate if you get my drift." Duo answered with a sexy smirk his fan girls swoon again.

"Okay, Bachelor #3 same question."

"I would be rich creamy French vanilla. If you see me you'll know why." Dark Bakura said in a husky sensuous voice. His fan girls start cheering.

"O-Kay." Sango said turning beet red. "Bachelor #2, if we started a garden together what flower would we plant?" she continued trying to recover herself.

"Plants? I know s##t about plants." Hiei mumbled pulling out a small communicator. "Kurama man help me out here?" he said in a low voice.

"Tell her roses." Kurama suggested from the audience.

"No way, hey is this broad hot or not?" Hiei whispered in to the communicator.

"She's beautiful. So answer her question." Kurama answered.

"Fine" Hiei grumbled as he put the communicator away. "Roses!" he answered.

"Bachelor #1 same question."

"Mallow flowers." Duo said simply.

"Okay, Bachelor #1 What does Bachelor #2 look like?" Sango asked.

"He looks like a cross between Fonzie and the biker from the villager people." Duo replied looking over at Hiei. The audience laughed as Hiei's fan girls boo.

"You mother [bleep], I'll kill you." Hiei shouted as he pounced on Duo.

"Gentlemen please, control yourselves! Security!" Ayame said appalled by the scene.

Head of Security, Toguro runs on stage and separates them quickly. Duo and Hiei glare at each other as they take their seats.

"Toguro! Toguro!" the audience chanted.

"Okay Bachelorette please continue."

"Okay Bachelor #2 What does Bachelor #3 look like?" Sango said a hint of confusion still touched her voice.

"He looks like a pretty boy pansy a##!" Hiei said looking at Bakura. Bakura's fan girls boo.

"At least I'm not a three eyed freakish troll!" Dark Bakura retorted.

Toguro, moved toward the stage before either can more. The audience is becoming split into factions. The three sets of fan girls for each bachelor and the men who just came to see the bachelorettes begin arguing.

"Just wait until I see your fairy a## outside!" Hiei threatened.

"Ooh, I shake with fear." Dark Bakura responded sarcastically.

"I don't mean to interrupt but our Bachelorette has one more question for you guys." Ayame said trying to get the attention back on to himself and Sango.

Sango is holding her forehead. "Why me?" she asked softly before responding to Ayame. "Right, Bachelor #3 If we were walking down a moon lit beach I would want you to... a) hold my hand, b) lightly kiss me on the cheek or c) grab my butt" The audience collectively laughed at the question.

"I would grab, hold, and kiss whatever body part you want, if you know what I mean?" Dark Bakura said in a deep sexy voice. His fan girls cheered.

Sango blinked in shook at his candidness. "He has never even met me and he speaks to me like this." She thought. "Right... Bachelor #1 same question." She asked again.

"I'm pretty old fashioned, so I go with a) holding hands under the moonlight would be romantic." Duo answered honestly. His fan girls swooned.

Hiei only scoffed. Duo glared hard at Hiei.

"What a gentlemen." Sango thought impressed. "Bachelor #2 same question."

"If I had you on a beach, alone in the middle of the night we would be doing more then what you just listed!" Hiei said frankly as the men in the audience roar their approval.

"Does #2 and #3 think I am some kind of slut or something." Sango thought. "They are worst then Miroku." She thought with a sigh.

"Alright, Bachelorette it is time to make your pick. Will it be Bachelor #1, Bachelor #2 or Bachelor #3?" Ayame asked filled with anticipation.

The audience members began to yell their favorites out.

"Hmm, I guess I choose Bachelor #1." Sango said. "He seems like the only gentlemen among them." She thought.

Duo smiled as Hiei and Dark Bakura only glared at him.

"Alright let's meet the two Bachelors you didn't pick first." Ayame said excitedly.

Sango get up and goes to stand by the divider.

"First up meet Bachelor #2, Hiei!"

Hiei walks around the barrier, Sango nods mildly and gives him a hug. He just gives her an penetrating gaze that makes her slightly stumble back.

"Now let's meet Bachelor #3, Dark Bakura!"

Dark Bakura walks around the barrier. He gives Sango a sizzling stare that causes her to shift uncomfortably. She hugs him and he kisses her on the lips surprising her. He walks away smiling satisfied.

"Now let's meet the man you did pick. Bachelor #1, Duo Maxell."

Duo walks out from behind the barrier and smiles boyishly. Sango sighs in relief and hugs him. He releases her and kisses her hand. She blushes furiously.

"Alright we're going to be sending you two off to the sunny beaches of Wakiki, Hawaii, where you are going to spend one fun filled week in the Ritz Carlton resort. Airfare included."

Sango and Duo smile at each other.

"We'll be back after these messages." Ayame said turning to talk to the young couple.

---------------

The camera does a pan of the audience who are cheering the return of the show from commercial break.

"Thank you! Thank you! Welcome back! Now it's time to introduce you all to today's eligible bachelorettes. And here they are. First up bachelorette #1. Hailing from Okinawa, Japan, she is a Space Pirate. She loves eating, sleeping and lazing about but do not piss her off or she becomes a real live wire. Please welcome ... the captivating Ryoko!" Ayame announced.

Man-Eater by Hall and Oates starts to play, while the audience waits for Ryoko to come out on stage. She walks out of the heart shaped door wearing a charcoal gray low cut dress that reveals her back and has a slit up the side. Ryoko glares at the camera annoyed. She walks over to her chair behind the divider. The Men roar their approval of her outfit.

"Next up bachelorette #2. Hailing from Tokyo, Japan, she is the Senshi of Love. She loves reading manga, chasing boys and being a fan girl just don't come between her and her friends. Please welcome ... the enchanting Minako Aino!"

Dirrty by Christina Aguilera starts to play, while the audience waits for Minako to come out on stage. She walks out of the heart shaped door wearing a strapless red dress that stops just below her knees. Minako grins at the camera. She takes a seat next to Ryoko behind the divider. The Men roar their approval of her outfit as well.

"Finally last but not least bachelorette #3. Hailing from DBZ Universe, she is a freelance demolitionist. She loves destroying buildings and picking on the weak about but don't call her a machine or you'll really make her angry. Please welcome ... the radiant Eighteen!!!

She's a Bad Mama Jama by Carl Carlton starts to play, while the audience waits for Eighteen to come out on stage. She walks out of the heart shaped door dressed in an emerald green dress with one arm and shoulder covered by a long sleeve and the other shoulder and arm is bare. Eighteen scowls at the camera angrily. She takes a seat next to Minako behind the divider. The Men shout lewd comments at her.

"And now introducing our Bachelor. He hails from Tokyo, Japan and is a Doctor. He likes reading, peace and quiet. He dislikes childish antics and inconsiderate people. Please welcome ... Hatori Sohma!"

Get Up Off That Thing by James Brown starts to play, while the audience waits for Hatori to come out on stage. He walks out of the heart shaped door wearing a finely cut tailored black suit. He looks at the camera solemnly. He walks over to his chair.

"How did I let those two talk me into this?" Hatori mumbles under his breath.

"Now, now, Ha-san, the bachelorettes are all very beautiful just you wait!" Ayame said to his friend.

Hatori only glared at Ayame.

"Okay, ask your questions!" Ayame said excitedly. "Finally he can stop away for Kana." He thought happily.

"Fine, Bachelorette #1 while sharing the holidays with my family you are asked to bring a dish of food. What would you cook?" Hatori asked with sigh of defeat.

"Uh" Ryoko responded pulling cell phone from subspace and dialing quickly. "Sasami, are you watching?... Help me out here what would you cook for me... cool." Ryoko hung up phone. "A Sushi platter."

"Okay, bachelorette #2 same question." Hatori asked slightly puzzled.

"Can I borrow that?" Minako asked Ryoko pointing to the cell phone. "Thanks..." she said dialing quickly. "Mako-chan? Help!...Right" Minako takes a deep breath and hangs up phone. "I would bring dessert, chocolate cake."

Hatori glares hard at Ayame and takes a deep breath. "Right, Bachelorette #3 I found that most women enjoy shopping what do you like to primarily shop for?"

"I mostly like shopping for clothes since I have been complimented on my figure." Eighteen admitted.

"You look good baby!" Random Men in Audience yelled out.

Eighteen caught off guard begins to blush.

"Bachelorette #2 same question"

Minako sighed in relief. Finally a question she could answer on her own. "Well I like to shop for clothes, jewelry, and the latest mangas and video games."

"Being a doctor I need a partner who is warm and conservative. One by one stand up for the audience to judge your appearance." Hatori said looking into the crowd.

Ryoko stands up first and slowly spins around the men hoot and holler. Next Minako stands up and also slowly spins around the men almost give her a standing ovation. Finally Eighteen gets up and spins around slowly for the crowd the men start cheering her on.

Hatori had been watching the crowd and he spots Shigure, who is smiling widely holding up three fingers. "Alright then, Bachelorette #1 I tend to work long hours how would you get me to come home? A) A Home cooked meal, B) Call me every five minutes until I get home or C) surprise me at work wearing nothing but a oversized coat?" Hatori instantly starts blushing. "That wasn't one of my answers!...SHIGURE!" Hatori glares at the crowd to see Shigure laughing his butt off.

"Actually I probably would do C) you always have to give you're a man an incentive!" Ryoko admitted as the men roar their approval over that response.

"Good grief" Hatori muttered. "Okay, bachelorette #2 same question."

"Sorry but I tend to bug some most likely B)." Minako answered honestly. The male audience members moan in disappointment.

"Same question to you #3"

"You seem like too much of a gentlemen to ask such a thing. I honestly think that if you desired me enough that one phone call discussion about my night clothing or lack of night clothing would be enough incentive to get you to come home." Eighteen answered straightforwardly no hint of seduction in her voice. The men start whistling and hooting again

"Hmm" Hatori said mildly impressed at her candidness.

"I think we have a winner." Ayame thought happily. "Okay, Ha-san it's time to choose will it be Bachelorette #1, Bachelorette #2 or Bachelorette #3?"

The audience members began to yell their favorites out.

Hatori looked at Shigure, who is still holding up 3 fingers. Finally he sighs. "I guess I'll go with #3" He answered

Eighteen looked shocked by that decision.

"What a relief! Back to Tenchi for me." Ryoko said happily.

"Congratulations." Minako told Eighteen sweetly.

"Now let's meet the bachelorettes you didn't choose."

Hatori get up and goes to stand by the divider.

"First up meet Ms. Ryoko!" Ayame introduced.

Ryoko walks out from behind the divider. Hatori bows and politely kisses her hand. She smirks amused as she leaves.

"Now meet Ms. Minako Aino!"

Minako walks out from the barrier. She instantly blushes when she sees Hatori. He once again bows and politely kisses her hand. She swoons as she walks away.

"Finally the moment of truth, let's meet the lady you did pick. Ms. Eighteen!" Ayame introduced with much gusto.

Eighteen walks out from behind the barrier. Hatori cocks an interested eyebrow at her. He bows to kiss her hand but she easily shifts herself and kisses him full on the lips startling him.

"Alright we're going to be sending you two off to the sunny beaches of Honolulu, Hawaii, where you are going to spend one fun filled week in the fabulous Hilton Resort hotel. Airfare included."

Sango and Duo return to the stage holding hands, while Hatori and Eighteen are also holding hands.

"Well I would like to thank all our contestants for playing the Dating Game! Tune in next time when the Special Guest host will be Glen Quagmire! Until next time!" Ayame finished as everyone waves to the camera.

[Fade Out]

[Bonus Footage: Behind the Scenes]

Dark Bakura is sitting at a make-up station when a male stage assistant walks up and hands him a coffee. He takes a sip and then instantly spits it out.

"What the HELL is this? I said I wanted a latte with non-fat milk not skim milk you idiot!" He bellows as he throws the coffee at assistant. "Get me another one!"

"That jerk! He was such a prima donna! Plus he took longer to get ready then the four ladies combined!" the stage assistant said in voice over mode.

[Next scene]

Hatori is locked inside the dressing room, while Ayame stands outside holding up a gaudy purple suit.

"Come on Ha-san! I made this especially for your big night! Don't you want to look special for the ladies!" Ayame whined.

"No! I don't even want to be here!" Hatori yelled through the locked door.

Female stage assistant walks over to Ayame holding several suits.

"Excuse me Mr. Sohma, they need you in wardrobe." Stage assistant notified Ayame.

"Oh thank you!" He said handing her the purple suit and skipping off.

"Mr. Sohma I brought some suits down from wardrobe for you to look through." She said knocking on Hatori's door.

Hatori opens the door and takes the suits. "Thank you."

"No problem, sir.: she answered politely. "He was so handsome it made me wish that I were one of the contestants." She said in voice over.

[Next scene]

Hiei is sitting in at the make-up station with an annoyed expression. The make-up artist is trying to powder him up but his jagan eye keeps blinking at her. Finally she put his bandana back on.

"That guy was so creepy! And what was with the third eye! I feel sorry for the bachelorette that picks him." Make Artist's voice over the shiver can be heard in her voice.

[Next Scene]

Sango is standing in front of the wardrobe room main mirror wearing a charcoal gray dress. She is frowning, as Ryoko walks out of dressing room dressed in a black dress with pink floral patterns.

"That dress is cute." Sango told Ryoko.

"You want to wear it? I hate pink." Ryoko asked.

"Sure." Sango said cheerfully.

The Head of Wardrobe walks over to them.

"So ladies what do you think of the dresses?" she asked the bachelorettes.

"Her dress looks better!" they answered in unison.

Wardrobe lady's voice can be heard. "Even though they traded dresses they were still less difficult then dressing the guys. Especially Hiei and Bakura they were so difficult to deal with."

[Cuts to scene of Hiei]

Hiei is standing with his arms crossed, scowling at the Wardrobe lady. She is holding up a pair of khaki pants and a white shirt.

"I refuse to prance around the stage looking like a candy a## fairy!" Hiei said sternly.

"Give me a break already, don't you want to impress the young lady." She asked.

"What you see is what you get!" he answered curtly.

[Cuts to scene of Bakura]

Bakura is holding up a black suit, obviously upset at the wardrobe lady.

"You dim wit! I will not wear this drab piece of s##t!" He yelled throwing the suit at her. "Take that crap out of my sight and get me something decent to wear. Before I make you really sorry!" he roared with a glared.

"See what I mean, Duo and Hatori were the easy ones to deal with when it came to fittings. Granted Duo ended up wearing a trench coat over the nice outfit I picked out for him. But at least he wasn't an a##hole about it." The Wardrobe lady explained in voice over.

[End Bonus Footage]

Author's Note: All our reality parodies will be done in the same timeline.