Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Cruel and Unusual Punishment ❯ Insert Catchy title here ( Chapter 10 )

A/N: Sorry People! I know updating's been slow, but think of it this way- only two more chapters to go and no more waiting!!! Okay, well, on with the chap! Keep in mind perople, I had to make up all this crap about Kurama's dad to make the story work. So DON'T BLAME ME!!!!!!!!!! I don't know when his real dad died or whatever, so please forgive me here. We're gonna say F.M. was kinda a bad guy, I'm gonna melt him into however I want it, so HA!

p.s. Everyone give a big thanks to my teacher, Mr. Brown, for letting me write this chap in his class. Everyone who does will receive Kurama plushies and cookies!

Chapter 10: Insert catchy title here ^^

Hiei's POV:
As we reached the demon brat's house, I noticed that the door was open.
"Wow, your baby sitting skills just amaze me beyond belief" Kasia said with enough sarcasm to drown a horse.
"Oh shut up you 7-year-old pain in the ass" I retorted. As we reached the step, I set Kumaru down and the vines instantly let her go. She ran into the house, and a moment later we heard a scream.
"KEPI!!!!!!!!!!! YOU'RE BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" the little girl screeched. Inside, Kumaru was holding a HUGE orange..thing. It had huge pointy ears with black tips, and a black fireball tail. I swear, that whatever it was had to be at least as big as she was.
"Kumaru, when did you get a, um, cat?" Kasia asked warily.
"Uncle bought it for me last month!" she said, hugging the thing tighter.
"Oh great" Kasia sighed, falling onto the couch. "Now that's three animals I have to watch." After several death glares in her direction, courtesy of me, I sat down on the couch next to her.
After a moment, I spoke. "You're not really 7, are you?"
"No," she replied, "I'm actually 14, but my body takes twice as long to catch up. When I'm 40 years old, I will look like I'm 20. MARU SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!" Kumaru sat in the corner with Kepi, growling, hissing, and pouncing on him-she-it. What is that thing? Then something came to my mind.

"Kasia, Kurama didn't know she was part fox. How do you know?" she sighed. "I knew her father very well." She sat for a moment not saying anything. I waited. And waited. And waited some more.
"WELL????" I finally asked. "What?" she screamed back. "I figured you would figure it out from there!"
"Oh, yes, everything's coming together now. Yeah right. THAT DOESN'T EXPLAIN ANYTHING!"."
She looked surprised. "Didn't Kurama ever tell you?"
"Tell me what?"
She gave an exasperated sigh. "Haven't you ever wondered how he can still use his spirit powers, even though he's in a human body now?"
I thought for a moment. "Not really. I just figured since his soul was that of a youkai, it would over run the body to make it do so. "
"Baka". She said. "It's because his dad was half fox!" I stared. Kurama doesn't even know that, I thought.
"I don't think Fred Minamino ever meant to cheat" she began, but was cut off by my snigger.
"Fred? What kind of name is that?"
"Well, the authoress didn't get any reviews giving her help with the name, so she had to make one up.""And all she could come up with was Fred?" An aura of fire surrounded Kasia
"Maybe some of us like that name" she growled menacingly, "Now do you want me to finish the story or what??" I nodded, and she continued.
"Any way, I don't think he meant to cheat, it just sort of happened. As far as I know, he never told Kumaru's mom that he was married either. They fell, in love, and got married. Fred faked his death so he wouldn't have to go through court, and changed his name to Yeoman. Everything went well for a while, then when Kumaru was 4, her dad got hit by a car, and then shot."
"hn. Baka-half ningen."
"Oh please! You expect him to just keep himself from getting shot?"
"Not that, yarou, the whole changing his name thing!"
"I thought I already explained that!!!!!!!!"
"You did, but I think he's a baka!"
"He was not!"
"Was too!"
"IIE!"

"HAI!!!!!!!!!"
"Stop!!!!!!! Stop fighting!" Kumaru cried!
"Damn, forgot she was there" Kasia muttered.
"How could you do that, she never shuts up." I muttered back.
"I heard that baby-sitter person!" she said, climbing on Kepi's back, and starting to play with his ears.
"So, what would that make Kumaru to Kurama? I mean, she's related to Suicchi, not Kurama." Kasia thought for a minute.
"Hm, I guess you could call her his...2nd half sister! Since they share a dad, but this wasn't Kurama's original body!"
"Hn. Whatever." was my reply.
She stared at me for a moment, biting back a retort. "Let's just order a pizza."
"Oh, I want a Pepperoni pizza with no pepperonis!" Maru called, still on Kepi's back. Kasia turned to me. "What kind do you want Hiei?"
"Hn."
"Okay then, guess I'll pick for you!" she said happily. She went to the kitchen, and cackled evilly. I don't think I'll eat tonight.

10 minutes later: (knock knock) That would be Kurama and Kahnna with the brat. I go to open the door, and stop dead.
"Kurama! I thought you turned into the Youko a couple of days ago!"
The fox with silver hair turned to me "Emri told me her mother had an age reversal potion in the attic, how could I resist?" That was when I noticed something. I tried to keep myself from laughing for the sake of my own life, but I couldn't help it.
Kurama's hair had been French braided. Roses and other flowers had been woven into it. The tips of his hair had been died pink. Worst of all, Emri was chewing on it anyway.
"Don't you dare say a word, Hiei, or you won't keep your head long enough to eat that pizza you ordered." That silenced me well enough.
"Hiei, no baka, you just gonna leave them standing there forever, get them in here!" Kasia yelled from the living room, where she had been playing Speed with Maru."Hn."
We all went inside and sat down on the couch. After much coaxing, Emri finally let go of Kurama's hair, and went to torture Kepi with Maru. Meanwhile, the rest of us sat there and waited. And waited.

And waited.

20 minutes after our pizzas should have been delivered, I heard another knock on the makeshift door.
"That's gonna be $23.50" The pizza woman said. Her name tag said Angel.
"Actually, we don't have to pay you", Kasia started, "you were late. The pizza's free." 'Angel's eyes narrowed.
"I had to come here all the way from Tokyo, and damn it you're going to pay me!"
"This is Tokyo baka!" I told her. She stared at me
"I don't care! You are going to pay for this pizza or I'm not leaving!"
Kasia stared. "Like hell you aren't"
"I'd like to see you stop me" she retorted, raising the pizza box above her head.
"My pleasure" I said, the first real grin appearing on my face for days.
After that, a series of things ensued. Me striking at 'Angel' with my katana, she blocking me with the pizza box, and several insults were thrown back and forth.
Stike from me.
"Baka!"
Block from her.
"Gaki!"
Yet another swing of my sword.
"BAKAYAORU!"
This time when she blocked, the pizza box opened, and everyone could smell the cheesy goodness flowing from inside. Maru, smelling the pizza from inside the house, ran out and grabbed the split box, and ran back in. 'Angel' raised her arms in defeat. "Alas, thee hath broken thy spirit, and lo! WHO THE HELL TALKS LIKE THAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!" She sighed and lowered her arm. "But, no I have no weapon, so I will go in and eat pizza with you guys."
"NO YOU WON'T!" I am starting to really get annoyed at this baka.
"I will!"
"You won't!"
"I WILL!"
"YOU WON'T!!!!!!!!!!!
"HAI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"IIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"DAMN YOUR HOT!!!!!!!!!!"
That stopped me well enough. The proclamation of my, um, hotness left me standing in that one spot long after 'Angel' and the rest of the idiots went into the house.
When I recovered from the first and worst shock of my life, I went inside to get what ever type of pizza that was that smelled so good.
'Angel' was sitting on the couch next to Yoko Kurama and Kasia, Maru and Emri were on the floor in to big fluffy things that look like caterpillars(sleeping bags^^ I have some at my house you can LITERALLY live in Emri: she does!) and eating a box of pizza, while Kahnna was in the kitchen getting drinks.
"Ah yes. Angel, you've been introduced to everyone else here, this is Hiei." Kasia said.
"Oh great, baka, give her my name, won't you." I said, along with a few death glares.
"Calm down, Hiei, Angel's really nice." Kahnna said, coming back with a tray full of drinks.
"Besides Hiei, you have to know her name, because we're all going to have a sleepover, and she's invited!" Kasia exclaimed.
"WHAT????????????" I screamed. Angel smiled, then took a bite of her slice.
"mm, Hiei, I mean pizza." I stood there, once again frozen in shock, until I heard a low growl coming from Maru. With a sudden urge for stupidity(I really need to get away from this house), and a memory from the Beverly Hillbillies show I watch with Kurama sometimes, I cried out,

"SIC 'ER, MARU!" With that, Maru jumped at the insane pizza woman, tearing the slice from her hand.
"Emri!" I called, never taking my eyes from the battle ensuing before me.
"What Uncle Hiei?" she asked, her face covered in pizza sauce.
"How do you use the phone? I need to call a lawyer."

40 Minutes and 1 restraining order later: Hiei's POV:
I have Angel tied up in the corner, and Kumaru is sitting in my lap. She is really useful sometimes, though if it wasn't for her I wouldn't be in this damn mess. This is gonna be a long night.
I was finishing my last piece of pizza when Yoko Kurama came up to me with one of those big caterpillar things.
"Hiei, this is your sleeping bag." He said. "You are going to be sleeping in it tonight."
"Hn. I need no such thing. I will sleep in a tree like always." His eyes narrowed.
"You will do no such thing. You will sleep in here with the rest of us." Oh, I hate these nights. He better have not found any more of those potions, because have some serious payback for when he's Suicchi again.
I walked inside the house and was greeted by a strange sight. Kahnna, Emri, and Kumaru were chasing each other around the house, while Kasia was setting a strange mat with different colored dots on the floor(AN: any guesses what that is??? Shippo plushies for the people who know!). As soon as she salled me, she grinned wickedly, and took out a spin top.
"Let's play Twister!"

A/N: Congrats to the people who guessed right! Hands out Shippo plushies.) I know Hiei was a little OOC, but hey, If I saw Yoko's hair like that, I'd fall on the floor laughing, even if I would get eaten by a death tree or something! Please R&R! Ja Ne Minna!