Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ My Naga Knight ❯ Chapter 5 ( Chapter 5 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

IMPORTANT: I just wanted to point out something to reviewers out there and people who want to be big on (harshly) critiquing my work or Raistlin's. As you can guess, this mini-rant/info, what have you is coming from a review that was thrown in our direction from a story we both are co-writing and I wasn't too keen on the review. It was filled with lectures of originality and how bad everything in our first chapter was—literally ripping it apart and not even telling us we did well in one part of the chapter which made us feel pretty useless as writers from this reviewer who had an inflated ego.
 
Guys, if a story's plot looks crappie to you to begin with or is still so even after the first couple of chapters, or there are things that irk you, and if you think the characters are equally bad as the plot or Mary-Sue in your opinion, please, for the love of God, do not review and tell me I pretty much just need to revamp the whole story. Believe it or not, I am writing for ME—not to please YOU—every chapter I belt out is something I like and not everybody is going to like what I do so please save me a lot of trouble and just keep the flaming/harsh critiques to yourself. I don't need it. There is at least some good in every story so please find it when you critique and if you can't, find something else to read!
 
What I am pretty much asking now is to please not critique my characters in a negative way or my plotline because I cannot change those from what I had set in mind. I map out my stories from start to finish and there is no way I am changing either or for you because it doesn't boat well for you. But if you find something like a hole in the story or something happens that seemed rushed, yes, go ahead and point out the error for me. Just don't tell me I need to rework my story completely for YOUR sake. Because this is MY story I am sharing and I don't want to feel I am a bad author because someone doesn't like what I am writing and feels the only way to show that is by tearing it apart. I want to know I am at least good at something.
 
But thanks to those of you who really help me continue going with your helpful criticisms and comments. And please leave me alone those of you who want to nitpick at my work or tear it apart because you're never helpful.
 
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Dustin paced back and forth upon his scaly body wondering where Jin and Touya had dashed off to. He was beginning to worry seeing as it had been a whole night without any sign of them and the leader of the group was beginning to wonder if they had been killed by passing humans. “I can't believe this,” the alpha male said with a growl filling up his words. “I ask those two to stay low until we get back and what do they do? They take off only to get themselves into trouble—or worse.”
 
The albino snake lifted his head off of his overlapped arms that were resting upon a bolder nearby he had wrapped his yellow and white snake half about. A part of him was feeling a bit worried himself even if he found Jin to be a nuisance at times. “I am sure they are just fine, Dustin. You know Jin may be an airhead but he can handle himself with the element he can control as a naga.”
 
The lead snake demon merely shook his head as he continued to pace back and forth with his hands gripped tightly on one another behind his back. He knew Jin and Touya were special, but that was because they were foreign creatures. The two snake demons slithered into Eytheria lost and alone with only the other at their side. Dustin took them into his group that had been cut down thanks to women and men alike who attacked their nests and killed their women and children. It was only them now and Dustin didn't want to lose anymore members. Sighing heavily, the demon's deep blood red eyes looked off at nothing particular with a few strands of his dark chocolate hair unraveling from the braid he put his long hair within to caress his cheeks. “I hope you are right, Aland.”
 
The trees whispered to one another when the wind began to blow calmly and steadily. It almost presented an anxious feeling to the snakes that had gathered below the canopy of the Hi'pulna Copse that was a reasonable distances away from the Cormac Farm to the south. All of the snakes got on alert for a moment as the birds took flight that were roosting within the trees with a furious flapping of their wings and a fear filled chirping sound that seemed to signal danger. Aland and Finlay sniffed about the area as Dustin tried to keep the two snake demons behind him seeing as he wasn't above losing more members of his family. The bushes that were moving now without the help of the wind caught Dustin's attention as he hissed irritably to ward off whoever was coming their way only to be caught off guard by the two snake demons he was worrying over to begin with.
 
Jin finally made his way past the bushes he was causing to tremble as Touya followed right behind him. The two snake demons could see the relief upon Dustin's face but it didn't take long for it to be replaced with anger and worry. The redhead's shaggy hair blowing about the wind that was conveying his feelings, Jin knew he was in for it as he looked innocently off to the side a moment before eyeing Dustin once more with his childlike look.
 
His arms crossed over his tanned chest, Dustin narrowed his eyes in disapproval, “Jin, Touya, where the hell have you two been! I have been wondering where you two jokers took off to for hours now!”
 
“I am sorry, Dustin,” Jin apologized as he rubbed his right arm to show that he knew he was in trouble. “Touya and I went back to the farm to check on a few things and I think regardless of what you believe that the girls will be okay and so we won't have to move.”
 
“Jin,” Finlay began on Dustin's behalf as he slithered forth on his multi-brown colored scales, “we have already found a place a days walk from here. It's at Lunar Lake and it has another farm there we can feed off of.”
 
Lunar Lake was far to the east of Eytheria was enclosed about in woods and mountains about the lake. It was called the Lunar Lake because of the crescent shape the lake made about the area. The farm they spoke of was owned by the Mallow family and known as Moon-Lu Farm after the moon like name the area was given. It was known for its amazing products and was actually a competitor to the Cormac Farm when it came to selling goods in the Eytheria Market.
 
“But—why must we move when the Cormac Farm is right here?” Jin wanted to know with his brow furrowing in worry.
 
“Jin, stop arguing with us,” Aland insisted with a stretch of his body as he glided up close to Dustin and Finlay. “We are moving to Lunar Lake. It is all we could ask for and more.”
 
“We might as well get a move on right now,” Dustin insisted, looking to everyone within his group. “It will take us awhile to get there and it's best to be settled.”
 
Jin was about to argue but Dustin's glaring pre-scold as well as Touya resting his hand upon his back to stop him, the naga could only sigh out his argument with a shake of his head in defeat. He had failed Pearl, the woman he promised he would watch over her daughters while she faced the afterlife. What am I going to do? Jin wondered as he embraced himself.
 
The alpha male noticed that Jin was looking awkwardly downhearted as he used the tip of his serpent tail to make the redhead look his way. “Don't be so upset. I know this area means a lot to you but there is nothing you can do. Unless, that is, you wish to stay here under your brother's care.”
 
Hearing of his brother made Jin's eyes widen briefly before jerking his head back with a furious shake of his red hair. “No! Of course not!”
 
Jin had a half brother he parted ways with somewhere down the line of moving from wherever he came from to Eytheria. His brother was a lightening naga and was a loner who dealt with his own affairs and was known to be quite the baby maker for the female snake demons he could find. The views of the two brothers clashed and his half brother's cold hearted attitude made Jin snarl and pull from him. Dustin never liked the snake demon either, but he knew if anything it was an alternative for Jin.
 
“Alright then,” Dustin said with a slight shrug. “Then come with us to Lunar Lake today and don't argue with us. We are not going to stay here and that is final—come.”
 
Feeling helpless in the situation, Jin couldn't help but look to Touya at this point with a pleading expression of help. There was nothing the ice snake demon could do at this point as he shrugged at Jin. He knew they would starve soon if they didn't go but then again, so would the girls Jin promised to look after. He was stuck just as Jin was.
 
“Just go with Dustin, Jin,” Touya advised softly in Jin's pointed ear. “There's nothing we can do at this point.”
 
“But what about the girls?” Jin demanded to know with a slight hiss of irritation that things weren't going his way.
 
“We will think of something, okay? Just calm down and think of alternatives on the way to Lunar Lake,” Touya answered as he narrowed his eyes further at the childlike snake demon who was threatening to throw a temper tantrum.
 
Jin could only snort out his irritation through his nostrils as he looked at Dustin and the others before grabbing onto his Diary he kept stashed away in his own sleeping area he considered his bed that was made up of rocks of different size and shape as well as wild grass and the five foot tall Paluu Tree leaves that were seen in many different parts of Eytheria but mostly near water.
 
Dustin headed on towards the Eytheria Plains once everyone was ready even if it would be a dangerous way to go about heading to Lunar Lake especially concerning that it was morning. But he knew it would be the fastest way there without having to take the detour through the forests. Leading the way through the Hi'pulna Copse, he made it towards Stone Passage where he would follow the road till it emptied out into the Eytheria Plains. The leader looking over his shoulder past Finlay and Aland to notice Jin looking lost in thought and quite upset.
 
“Don't worry,” Dustin retorted to everyone though mostly aiming for Jin in the very back of the group, “we will get there soon enough and be settled before the sun sets on the second day.”
 
Jin said nothing as he kept the leather covered dairy in his embrace thinking on what he was going to do when it came to the Cormac Farm he was leaving. Looking over in the direction from whence they came, Jin could only fidget with the pages that were in his diary as he headed after Dustin against his will.
 
 
 
 
Blythe grabbed onto the dishes that were finished that morning to wash them in the sink for Neda. Both were still confused as to who would drop by to make them breakfast and not at least speak to them, but not much was said over breakfast as the two girls had their first meal without their parents. Neda continued to eye the note that was left behind with the food before putting it back on the table with sadness ringing in her eyes.
 
The elder sister looked over her shoulder at her sister before speaking to her over the running water, “You know, I bet it was the same people who made mom and dad's grave.”
 
Hearing of her parents' grave, Neda couldn't help but frown a moment as she got to her feet gradually. “You didn't bury them? I thought you did.”
 
“No, they were already buried when I went out to look for where I hid their bodies,” Blythe explained as she finished washing the dishes with the wash rag. “And whoever they were knew their names.” Sighing a bit, she looked through the window before her that showed the corral filled with the barn animals. “Speaking of which, we need to find someone who can rebuild the barn…the animals cannot stay out there forever.”
 
“How?” Neda wondered with doubt in her tone. “We don't have the money to pay someone to help rebuild it.”
 
“Neda, we have to try and fix this place or we are going to die of starvation if our cows die from being put out in pasture during harsh weather conditions,” Blythe put morbidly though truthfully. Flicking the water off of her hands, Blythe grabbed onto a towel to wipe them off before putting up the bowls and silverware she wiped down. “I am going to take Midnight and go into town and see if I can find help. And maybe sell off some milk once I milk the cows. Do you want to come with me or at least help me for that matter?”
 
Neda seemed to dodge the topic a bit as she looked at Blythe confused, “What about your arm? Shouldn't you be taking it easy if it was bandaged up?”
 
“It just hurts a little where Stella's hoof nicked me. It's nothing bad. Besides, one of us has to do the work around here and I am wondering if you will help me,” Blythe wondered, hoping she could have some assistance in this matter.
 
However, from the way Blythe was standing made it feel to Neda as though she was being criticized for not helping out lately, and it made her anger slightly rise. “Mom and dad are dead! Can't you just back off of me and let me take this in?”
 
“Neda, I know it's hard not to grieve, but you need to really think about how things have changed now,” Blythe replied sympathetically. “Mom and dad—aren't here anymore and they never will be. We need to work on staying alive unless you either wish to go with them into the afterlife, or for me to find us new parents!”
 
Either option irritated Neda into tears as she shook her head at her sister. “Do what you want…I don't care what you do!” Turning on her bare feet quickly, Neda hurried out the door in her nightgown before grabbing onto the wooden pole that supported the porch ceiling to the left of the porch. She grabbed onto it tightly as if it were her only thing that could support her just like it did with the wooden roof.
 
Pushing herself off of the well carved, circular wooden plank, Neda rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand as she made her way down the stairs and into the yard. The dew that was embedded in the grass that morning married with her small feet, causing a bit of dirt and grass clippings to stick to them as she walked towards the big oak tree her parents were buried at. Kneeling before the two markers that Jin constructed for them, Neda could only shake her head a bit as she rested her hand upon the marker of her mother.
 
“Mom…I wish you were here,” Neda whispered as the wind teased her beige colored hair. “I really wish none of this had happened…those stupid snake demons!”
 
Blythe didn't know what to say at this point as she sighed out her sadness and frustration she was feeling towards having to take on everything without her sister's help. The Cormac daughter opened the door to the front porch before taking the steps on the right to head towards the chicken coop with a basket so she could get the eggs from the chickens as she was taught to do since she was six. On her way there, she could see Neda at the grave markers, only able to show her sadness to the situation for a moment before heading onward to grab the eggs she would need to sell and keep in stock for themselves.
 
Neda looked over her shoulder when she heard the chickens and roosters causes a fuss knowing that Blythe had to be tending to them at the moment. Embracing her torso, she helped herself to her wet feet to head back to the house. On the way there, Neda was stopped by the braying neigh of the horses within the corral that seemed awfully crowded for both the horses and cows. Her deep green eyes caught the newborn that Stella had birthed just last night making her rethink on where she wanted to head. Neda looked up at the door that wasn't too far from where she was standing before heading towards the enclosed area to get a closer look at the colt.
 
The poor thing was startled as it could be expressed in the way she carried herself and shook upon her wobbly legs. Stella was so distraught over the fire and loss of her mate that she had obviously forgotten all about her baby. The newborn was equally frightened but also hungry seeing as Stella was neglecting her.
 
Neda's fingers bend slightly over the wooden planks that constructed the corral as she looked at the unnamed baby mare wondering what she should do with her now. “Poor thing…your mommy doesn't really look after you much anymore, does she?”
 
The deep black eyes of the young horse looked over to the girl that was speaking to her with a muffled whinny. The black muzzle of the beast met with Neda's fingers as the warm breath caressed her hands when the nostrils of the baby flared to take in her scent as if to hunt for the smell of food.
 
Knowing that if she wasn't careful with her fingers, that the little one may try and nibble on them, Neda flattened her palm for the newborn to smell of before petting her on her pitch black face. “I guess I can relate. My mom and dad are gone too. They won't take care of me anymore.” Neda brought her hand back to cross over the wood before her to eye the baby of Stella a bit longer. “You don't look so good.” Getting a bit tired of the new addition not having a name, Neda sighed a bit in thought. “You need a name and since my mom and dad can't name you being you came from their horses, I will.” Tapping her fingers upon the boards that kept the animals enclosed, Neda ran through some names that would match the black and white young one. “I guess I will call you…Black Rose.”
 
The coal colored ears of Black Rose erected slightly at the sound of the name before flipping to the back to listen to the sounds coming from behind her. The words combined meant nothing to her at the moment but she stayed put to watch and listen to Neda carefully.
 
Blythe managed to pick up the last bit of eggs she needed before exiting out of the coop a few moments later to find Neda was helping the young foal back towards the house oddly enough. A bit startled by what she was seeing, Blythe hurried towards Neda though carefully knowing she could crack the eggs if she wasn't. “Neda, what are you doing? Put her back in the pin!”
 
Neda's arms made their way around Black Rose's neck as she shook her head. “Her name is Black Rose and since mom and dad aren't here, I might as well take her; especially if Stella isn't going to and Coal is dead.”
 
“But—Neda, you cannot let Black Rose stay inside of the house!” Blythe felt need to point out with a shake of her reddish brown hair. “She belongs out here where her mother is. I am not above cleaning up after her and I know you won't.”
 
Looking off to the side angrily, Neda eventually had the courage to eye her elder sister as she did so through her messy hair. “Blythe, Black Rose needs something to eat or she is going to stave! Can you at least let me do that before making me put her back?”
 
Shaking her head as if to single her defeat at arguing with her sister Blythe outstretched her hand with the basket to give to her sister. “Take those back inside and wash them for me. I have to milk the cows now and I will get you the milk you will need.”
 
Nodding, Neda took the basket her sister handed her before helping Black Rose towards the house. Neda opened the front door to wave for the young foal inside before entering right behind her with the eggs she was to wash. The basket being placed upon the kitchen counter where the sink was, Neda paused as something caught the sun with a crimson shine out of the corner of her eye. Seeing as the glow looked almost like blood, Neda gazed over at the object there upon the floor that was near the window closest to the staircase.
 
“What is that?” Neda wondered as she walked over towards the stairs to kneel in front of the sun's light to pick up the crimson red snake scale that was left behind by Jin. Since Neda had never felt of the snake demon's scales and never saw them clearly at night, she could only look at the scale confused as to what it was. “Whatever it is, it looks pretty.” The red scale catching the light from every angle, Neda placed the scale on the counter. “If I had enough of them, I would make a necklace out of them.” Turning her attention back to the eggs before her, Neda grabbed onto one to start cleaning them off as she normally did as her chore growing up.
 
 
 
 
Blythe had to milk the six cows they had only to have the day pass her by awfully quickly once she was finished. She was exhausted and the thought of going into town made her groan though knew she had to. Picking up the many pails that were filled with milk now, Blythe managed to drag herself back towards the house as the sun was threatening to set. Opening the front door wearily, she came into the house to find Neda relaxing upon the sofa with Black Rose sleeping on the floor.
 
“Neda,” Blythe sighed with exhaustion, “I got the milk you can give to Black Rose as you call her.” Wiping her forehead with the back of her hand, Blythe hunted for a bottle that her mother kept in the cabinets. Her hands finally stumbling upon it, she pulled it out from the cupboard and filled it with the milk the baby could drink.
 
The younger Cormac sister got to her feet so she could grab the bottle from her elder sister as she kept the snake scale in her hands. “Blythe,” Neda began as she took the filled bottle, “do you think you could pick me up a chain or something for this?”
 
Blythe looked down at the scale her sister was holding only able to wonder as well what it was, “What is that and where did you find it?”
 
“I found it near the stairs and I don't know what it is but it does look pretty, doesn't it?” Neda answered as she let her sister view it from all sides.
 
“Here,” Blythe said softly as she handed the bottle over to Neda. “Right now I need to get my horse saddled up and head into town. It's so late as is…I am beginning to wonder if I can make it there and back without having to leave you here alone.”
 
Taking the bottle into her hands, Neda could see that it was indeed getting pretty late as she shrugged to her sister. “If you have to stay in town in one of the inns, it's okay with me. I can make it here alone.”
 
“I know you don't mind, sis, but I have to be here with you especially when the sun sets.” Blythe's hands searched for the containers that her mother used when presenting the milk to the markets nearby. Eventually finding what she needed, she poured the milk within the glossy brown containers that held their logo on it carefully. “I don't want you to be here by yourself without someone watching over you.”
 
Neda made her way over to the sofa once more where she woke the staving Black Rose to entice her with the bottle she now carried. The little foal caught onto the rubber nipple of the bottle to suck down the milk eagerly while Neda petted her. “I won't be alone. Those people mom and dad made friends with obviously check in on us. I will be fine.”
 
“But, Neda, I don't know if that's for certain whom those people are!” Blythe argued as she finished pouring the milk in the right jars. “Just—promise me you will put Black Rose back out in the corral when you are finished feeding her. And help me with this so I can saddle Midnight.”
 
Black Rose eventually finished drinking the cow milk she was given allowing Neda the free hands to guide the young horse out of the house and with the milk and eggs Blythe had gathered since her sister's hands were full with the saddle she would have to put on Midnight as well as the reins and blanket. While Blythe saddled up her horse, Neda guided Black Rose back into the corral still keeping the eggs and milk protected.
 
Fitting the bit into Midnight's mouth once the blanket and saddle were on him, Blythe swung herself on over pure black stallion before reaching for the eggs and milk. “This is going to be difficult since I don't know how to hitch him up to the wagon. I am going to have to go very slowly so it might be past midnight when I come home, Neda. Just be careful, okay?”
 
Neda sighed a bit as she nodded, watching as Blythe gently nudged the stallion in the ribs with her heels to make him go slowly since the eggs could break if he went too quickly. Embracing herself with a soft sigh, the younger daughter of the deceased Cormacs headed back towards the house since it was getting late and there was not much to do now but wait for the day to end.
 
 
 
 
The wolves about Eytheria almost whined to the moon that was about to rise once Blythe stirred Midnight into the closest town they traded and sold their items to known as Kalrune Village. It was a quaint village that was almost like Eytheria's market place and it was built not too far away from Eytheria's walls to the southeast of where it stood. It was the closest thing Blythe could get to without having to worry about carrying on with food that might entice snake demons or other creatures and so she turned on into the village.
 
Many people were getting ready to pack it in seeing as the day was almost over and Blythe didn't know what to say at this point as she sighed. “I was too late,” she said sorrowfully to herself. “I guess I will have to find an inn and wait until day break to sell this stuff and look for help.”
 
Kalrune Village was filled with one to two level houses, a graveyard, and stores for people to buy anything they could think of. Demons were known to sneak into the village from time to time but some of the Eytherian Guards were posted at the town nearby seeing as it was in the King's interest to do so. One of the knights patrolling the center of the town couldn't help but notice the young girl and the black stallion she was riding upon that almost threatened to blind in with the night.
 
The deep blue eyes of the male catching the two, he approached the two slowly knowing if he ran up to the steed, it would buck and throw the female off. “Excuse me, miss,” the guard began as he finally made it to the side of the stallion. “I don't know where you are headed but it's quite late and I think you should be at home.”
 
Blythe looked down at the knight to notice he had dusty blond hair and deep blue eyes. The armor he wore was silver and carved in different designs but mostly with that of a phoenix taking flight on the chest plate seeing as Eytherian people believed in the mythical beast as their protector. The shoulder-guards were the same kind of silver and he wore the same kind of armguards that embraced his wrists and jut out to a diamond like point over his elbow with black gloves on either hand. The armlets were also silver and had many different designs upon them such as curves and circles and lines that had no specific direction upon them just like the leg-guards that reached up to the knee in the same fashion. He wore an undershirt that was long-sleeved and the color of black as well as pants the same color. The guard had a belt around his waste that was brown leather and held a big buckle with another handcrafted phoenix in the center that took up the entire oval shaped buckle. There was a cape that wrapped about his neck and draped down his back for the sake of the cold night air he had to patrol within that was colored black on the backside but a dark ivy color on the underside. It was the first time Blythe had ever seen a knight up close before and she couldn't help but gawk a bit at his attire before speaking.
 
“I'm—I'm sorry, I know it's curfew and all but I came here looking for help and to sell this stuff but I guess it got late,” Blythe sighed in sadness.
 
The man could hear that she was worried and stressed over whatever happened at her home but all he could do was offer reassurance at the moment. “Alright, it's okay. How about I check you into The Griffon Inn? That way when you get up, you can do what you set out to do.”
 
“I guess—that'll do for now. Though I promised my sister I would get back to her tonight,” Blythe remembered as she bit her thumbnail in worry.
 
The young man grabbed onto Midnight's reins to guide her through the town towards the inn he promised he would get her to. “Don't worry about your sister. I am sure she will be okay. By the way, where exactly did you come from?”
 
“From the Cormac Farm just up the road a mile or two. I am Blythe Cormac.”
 
The smooth, dirty blond hair of the young knight moved slightly with the wind as he looked up at her through the strands that blew into his face from where his bangs, that reached his chin, were once placed off to the side. “Oh really? I hear your food is the best. My name is Thane—Thane Wilson. I've been guarding Kalrune Village for a few months now. That is, ever since I became a knight.”
 
“I thought you looked kinda young compared to the other knights around here,” Blythe remarked as he continued to guide her steed towards the inn in the back of Kalrune.
 
Thane couldn't help but chuckle a bit as he nodded using the spear he had for fighting any demons as a walking stick. “Yes, I am only twenty years old compared to these other old geezers who patrol as the night shift. Here we are—The Griffon Inn.”
 
The Griffon Inn was a four story inn that was known in Kalrune as the best of the bunch littered within the village. He knew they stayed open all night long for just in case scenarios even if closing time for most places was around eight at night. All of Eytheria was big on curfew given the demon problem that would arise at nightfall. Thane knew if any place, this would be the one for her.
 
“Thanks, Thane,” Blythe replied softly. “Can you help me out here for a minute and take the eggs I have so I can handle the milk and get down?”
 
“Of course,” Thane nodded as he took the basket she was holding carefully before offering his hand to her to help her with her dismount. Handing the eggs back to her, the knight petted the black stallion gently with his gloved hand. “I will take care of the horse while you check in. Don't worry about him. I will make sure he gets only the best care.”
 
“Thank you once again, Thane. I guess I will see you around when I come by here at night to drop off food.”
 
“I guess I will see you in the morning hours before you go about your business,” Thane chuckled within the back of his throat as he kept a hold of Midnight. “My time isn't over until the sun rises so I guess I will see you when I am about to fall asleep. Sleep well, Blythe.”
 
Blythe couldn't help but smile softly at the knight before turning her attention to the entrance of the inn. Helping herself inside, she could only hope that Neda would be okay without her there until late into the next day as she made it to the check in desk. Please hold tight, Neda…I will be home as soon as I find us some help. We could really use it seeing as mom and dad are gone.