Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Sayonara to Normality! ❯ Damn That PMS! ( Chapter 7 )

Hello again! My, my, I think I'm remembering why I usually don't update this much. I have nothing to say!

Disclaimer: Sam I Am tried to make me eat green eggs and ham, so I threw my disclaimer at him to stall him while I ran away. I think he still has it.

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Chika's house

"I COMPLETELY FORGOT MY HOMEWORK!" yelled Chika suddenly, dashing upstairs to retrieve her book bag and finish it, since she had school in the morning. She'd been downstairs watching some crazy show about a kid who was brought back from the dead and had weird new powers. Shishi was sulking in his room, simply staring at the wall (Which had a mirror on it, so this could have also had something to do with it) and refusing to say anything to anyone until he was to be brought back to Makai.

Chika dashed into his room, "THIS IS YOUR FAULT YOU KNOW! IF YOU HADN'T BEEN LYING IN THE STUPID PARK NEARLY DEAD, I'D HAVE NEVER FORGOTTEN!" she screamed, immaturity rang in her voice, but she didn't care. She just wanted someone to blame beside herself.

It seemed as though the pretty boy wasn't what you would call even halfway decent when it came to keeping a vow of silence, "Yeah? Well I hope you can't finish it, and your teacher gets extremely mad at you," he said grumpily.

"Do you know how to be anything other than I jerk?!" she snapped.

Shishi sneered, "Do you know the meaning of 'maturity'? Maybe when you've discovered it, I won't act…as much…this way."

"Asshole!" cried Chika, stomping downstairs to finish her homework.

"Bitch," muttered Shishi, not going out of his way for her to hear him. He looked back at his reflection, "Oh wakamaru," he said sadly to it, "that stupid human made your hair tense up," he grabbed a brush and began to comb his hair. Can we say 'conceited', folks? Yes, I believe we can.

"Can't believe…certain idiots…bastards…" muttered Chika downstairs in the kitchen, working on an essay about women's rights that was due tomorrow. Unfortunately, due to her current mood, the essay wasn't really turning out about women's rights. It was turning out to be more about how evil and stupid men were, and how they should have been the ones oppressed, not women. Oh well. It wasn't like the teacher was expecting much anyway, the only subjects Chika had work above medium par in were biology, math, and art. This was for history.

"Why do humans even need this 'school' anyway?" Shishi asked his reflection, 'Because they're morons,' he answered to himself, 'Because most of them wouldn't have the desire to learn anything unless it was law, so that's how they made it. Because they can't stand on their own two feet until they get this 'diploma' thing from some sort of elevated school…thing…' (Note: Bye 'elevated school', Shishi was thinking of high school. The two words are synonyms and Shishi's a demon who'd never even gave humans a second though before, so he doesn't think it makes much difference which you use).

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Team Urameshi's room for the tournament

Suzuki bashed down the door of the room, and ran in, hoping for salvation. He quickly pushed the door back up, making it appear as it normally did as the fangirls ran down the hall searching for him and wondering where he'd gone. When the last of them rushed by, he relaxed and let the door lean against the wall. Suddenly, he heard a toilet flushing and Kuwabara walked out of the room's bathroom. Uh-oh. He'd thought the room was empty…

Kuwabara glared at him, "What are you doing here?!"

Suzuki decided that Kuwabara probably had a rather large ego and decided to try to the 'groveling at his feet' plan, "You must help me!" he cried, rushing over to Kuwabara and dropping on his knees.

"Uh…with what?" asked Kuwabara, raising an eyebrow.

"It's…it's horrible…I can't put words to the devastation…they plague me…they won't keep away…make them go away!" sobbed Suzuki melodramatically, breaking into hopeless tears and clinging to the bottoms of Kuwabara's pants.

Kuwabara sighed deeply, "How'm I supposed to help if you don't tell me what's wrong? And why are you asking me anyway?" he asked suspiciously.

"Well…um…I gave you the sword…and now you need to do something for me?" offered Suzuki weakly, "and the problem is…" he looked around the room wildly, as though checking for spies, "fangirls," he whispered.

The large orange-haired man broke into hysterical laughter, "You can't keep away some girls!?" he asked, positively rolling on the ground with laughter.

"Not some…there's millions! And they're everywhere! And-"

Sadly, a few girls walked by at that moment and they saw Suzuki, "Look everyone! There he is!" one of them shouted. Kuwabara and Suzuki heard a loud, "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!" from down the hallway and a mass of girl moved down the hallway, causing the floor to shake in a way that would have broken the Richter Scale.

Suzuki looked like a deer in headlights.

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Chika's house

At about 1:30 AM, just as Chika was finishing her homework, she saw her sister stagger through the door, back from Tori Jinta's party. Chika scowled, being angry at generally the entire world right now, 'Stupid Leiko. She can go party all day and all night while I'm stuck hear being visited by grim reapers that want to erase my memory, tiny gods, blue ogres, and being forced to practically baby-sit some vain demon! And then I need to do about five hours worth of homework! Why does she have it so easy? It's not fair…'

"Why are you up?" asked Leiko, staggering over to the kitchen table where Chika was.

"Because unlike some people, I have homework that needs to be done! I don't just run around all day doing whatever I damn feel like!" growled Chika.

"You about at that time of the month again?" inquired Leiko, trying to sit down, but being so hopelessly drunk that she missed the chair and fell to the floor instead.

"Oh hell! That is coming up!" fumed Chika, "Why does everything have to go wrong for me?" she whined.

"Do ya adolescents have ta whine, whine, whine about everything? Drop the angst, I'm gonna go to bed," moaned Leiko, rubbing her head.

'Stupid. No one cares about what I do!' thought Chika angrily to herself. Can we say 'immature', folks? Yes, I believe we can.

"Do-re-mi-fa-so-la-ti-doooooooo!" sang Shishi, who was taking a shower at the moment. Unbeknownst to much of Makai, Shishi was actually a good singer too, 'Charming, good-looking, physically fit and active, intelligent, modest, loved by all, and a good singing voice on top of that,' thought Shishi stepping out of the shower, 'I've just got it all,' he thought, once again admiring his reflection, 'In fact, I'm perfect. Not in a sickening way, but I am perfect. That must explain why humans were created the way they are. After God's vision and creation of me, there wasn't enough perfection to reach their inferior race. I'm so pretty…'

~The following morning~

Shishi walked over to Chika's bed and noted them time, 7:00 AM. He was pretty sure that she had this 'school' thing today, 'To wake, or not to wake…that is the question,' he thought dramatically. Then he stopped, thought of what he'd just said, and blanched, 'God, I'm starting to sound like Suzuki.' He shrugged it off and poked Chika's forehead, in a way that he thought was light. Well, being a strong demon, and Chika a weak human, a 'light poke' for a demon turned into, 'Something's crushing my skull! Aaaaaaaaaaaagh!' for a human.

Chika shot up and looked around wildly, then turned to glare at Shishi, "Thanks for trying to murder me," she muttered foully, getting out of bed and barely noticing the time.

"I can't help it if there's such a power difference between us that…"

"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT!"

As she stomped off to the bathroom, Shishi looked down at the bed and noticed a quite large spot of red on the sheets, "Ah-hah…whatever could this be, I wonder?" he said to himself sarcastically.

"Look, Leiko's gone out to wherever and I've got to leave for school. If there is any sort of damage to this house when I return, there will be hell to pay," snarled Chika in a dangerous voice as she put her toothbrush away and have Shishi a direct glare.

Shishi ignored her, "That looks like a boy's uniform," he stated.

"So what?"

"So I'm not surprised it you can wear it. You've got such small-"

"Do we need to bring the frying pan into this?" asked Chika dangerously.

Shishi's eyes widened, "No ma'am!" when she left the room, he opened one of the cabinets in the room and searched for something in it, "This'll work…"

As Chika walked out of the house, Shishi stood at the door and called out, so all the neighbors could hear, "Did you remember to pack extra sanitary pads? You don't want to go getting a spot on that uniform you, know, it'd really stick out!" he shouted, waving a few pads in the air as he did so, so that no one had any doubts about what sort of 'pads' he was talking about.

"Quit trying to ruin my life!" screamed Chika back to him.

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Oh, the unparalleled joys of PMS. Not. I had brief thoughts about blatant self-insertion before I started this fic (dropped them quickly though, deciding the concept of a fan discovering one of her favorite characters in her room was unconscious plagiarism of my friend Jeril's fic, and in this case, it's more amusing to have two people who've just met and never knew anything about each other before clashing like this) and with some of the things that are happening to Chika, I'm glad I didn't. I'd never be able to stand the mortification that would come from someone shouting out the door and asking if I had enough extra pads O_o.

Heero: *In bushes as always* Kurama doesn't even help her in author notes! Why does she still want him around?!

Karasu: *Sigh* I thought we went over this before. It's because Kurama is delicious.

Heero: I thought we went over the fact that you disturb me before, too and I want you to go away, but apparently not.

Until the next update!

~TRF