Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Tantei Trivia ❯ Last chapter ( Chapter 5 )

Psychicfiredemoness: Hi everyone. I have some bad news for the story and any or all of my fanfics. My stupid brother screwed the computer the hell up and the internet isn't working because of that so this may be my last chapter, either till my dad fixes the computer or till we get a new computer, which probably won't happen…ever.

Hiei: So this may be your last entry on fanfiction.net?

Psychic: [nods]

Hiei: As in no more stories, ever?

Psychic: [shrugs]

Hiei: [evil grin]

Psychic: [thinks] But I can always give my friends evil anime fanfic ideas, where you get attacked by a 2x4. Just read one of Animefangirl1's YYH fanfics.

Hiei: [glares]

Psychic: Okay then. I own nothing.

-.-.-.-.-

Chapter 5

Scorch: Welcome everyone to the season finale. So yeah these are going to be basically psychotic as hell questions. You guys got-

Audience: [gets shocked]

Scorch: Never mind. But that is WHY we are having the season finale. The circuits are still shot and someone messed with the-

Lights: [go out]

Scorch:-fuse box and because the sweet snow incident from episode 2, the stage lights are-

Lights: [turn on]

Scorch:-falling every so often, so either the contestants, audience, or cast. Meaning me, Kayori, Sapphire, or one of the camera people. And there are only three camera people.

Stage light: [falls on camera man 3]

Scorch: Make that 2 camera men.

Hiei: Can we get on with it so we can all leave this god forsaken place?

Scorch: [gets tazer out and shoots Hiei with it] (some tazers have cords that shot out and can stick into a person's skin; I know someone with a tazer so don't ask.) Now on with the questions. But first a word once again from our sponsors.

-5 minutes later-

Scorch: Okay we're back.

Lights: [go out]

Scorch: [lights a candle and puts it in one of those old fashioned candle holding things] Okay NOW the questions can begin being asked. And yes I know how little sense that made Kurama so DON'T bring attention to it fox boy! Uh fox boy?

Lights: [go on]

Everyone: [looks at where Kurama was sitting]

Kurama's seat: [has little voodoo doll on it that looks like him]

Kurama fan girls: Ahhhh!!!!! Where's Kurama-kun!?

Scorch: [flipping through script] That, wasn't supposed to happen.

Kuwabara: Maybe he went to the bathroom.

Yusuke: And maybe your head's empty.

Kuwabara: Shut up Urameshi!

Two boys: [again start to fight]

Scorch: [throws light that fell on camera man 3 at them]

Kuwabara: @.@

Scorch: Well at least I hit one of them. Now while we send someone to find Kurama, let's get to the questions. First what weighs more a pound of feathers or a pound of gold?

Yusuke: Don't they weigh the same?

Kuwabara: @.@

Hiei: The feathers.

Botan: Gold.

Scorch: Gold is weighed in 12 ounce pounds, feathers in 16 ounce pounds. So a pound of feathers.

Sapphire: Hey we can't find Kurama.

Scorch: Did you check EVERYWHERE?

Sapphire: [nods]

Scorch: Did you check the basement?

Sapphire: [nods]

Scorch: Did you check the sub-basement?

Kayori: We have a sub-basement?

Scorch: Yes! Now go check the sub- basement!

Sapphire and Kayori: [both leave]

Scorch: Why are roses red?

Yusuke: Because Kurama made it so?

Others: [anime fall]

Scorch: Next since Kuwabara is dead from the neck up and Kurama is M.I.A.

Hiei: [shrugs in the `why should I give a damn' way]

Botan: I don't know.

Scorch: Until the 19th century, roses were white or pink. In 1832, a China rose was crossed over with a deep-red hybrid flower. So for a red rose was `born'. Hey Yusuke is the baka awake yet?

Yusuke: [looks down] He's gone!

Scorch: Damn now we can't try to mess his face up more then it already is!

Yusuke: And look at this. [holds up Kuwabara voodoo doll]

Scorch: That's awkward. Lets' take a small break while we look for the missing people.

-5 minutes later-

Scorch: We couldn't find the two missing. I hope-

Light: [falls on camera man 1]

Scorch: -I don't lose my job.

Hiei: You deserve to lose your job and this show should be cancelled!

Scorch: Touchy little thing aren't ya?

Hiei: Little? [draws katana]

Botan: Uh? Where's Yusuke?

Yusuke's seat: [little Yusuke voodoo doll]

Scorch: What the hell is going on today!? [starts cussing in pig-Latin]

Kayori You gone?

Scorch: Yes now, let's continue with the show before we-

Light: [falls on the last camera man]

Scorch: summon the police and find out everyone died a HORRIBLE, GRUESOME, VIOLNET, death.

Botan: Don't say that!

Scorch: Hey what happened to the other voodoo dolls?

Fan girls? [trying to kill Kuwabara doll and hugging Kurama doll and steal Yusuke doll. In other terms, they're all pulling on the arms trying to torture or steal the voodoo dolls]

3 voices: [scream in pain]

Everyone: [looks around]

Scorch: This is like a bad horror movie, the killer's picking us off one by one and replacing us with real working voodoo dolls! Who will be next!?

Hiei: The baka ferry onna.

Botan: Hiei.

Scorch: That wasn't a show question you idiots!!!!!!

Botan: Oh fine. But I'm calling Koenma. [searches pockets] Some one stole it!

Scorch: See and now we can't contact the outside world!

Kayori: I think she's been watching too much sci-fi.

Scorch: Shut up hyper baka onna!

Lights: [go out]

Scorch: WHO EVER THE HELL IS DOING THAT IS GOING TO GET THEIR SORRY ASS OR ASSES BARBEQUED AND KICKED TO WHERE EVER THE HELL YOU CAME FROM YOU STUPID JACKASS OR JACK ASSES!!!!!!!

Lights: [back on]

Hiei: [replaced by voodoo doll]

Botan: [replaced by voodoo doll with little oar]

Scorch: [evil grin, pokes Hiei voodoo doll in the forehead]

Hiei's disembodied voice: Baka onna! Stop doing that!

Scorch: Fine. [throws to fan girls]

Fan girls: [fight over it]

Hiei's disembodied voice: You'll pay for this!

Sapphire: Any one up for going to the lounge?

Scorch: There's a lounge?

Kayori: You didn't know that?

Both girls: [try not to laugh]

Scorch: Hey you didn't know you had call waiting!

Kayori: [stops laughing]

-lounge-

Scorch: Okay there are two possibilities.

Kayori: Such as?

Scorch: The great Spirit Detectives were kidnapped or they messed with the fuse box during the bathroom breaks and devised this plan to get me fired so they would never have to return to `Tantei trivia'. Hey! I thought of a name for the show!

Kayori: Good for you. [orders something from vending machine.]

Machine: [nothing happens]

Kayori: Uh could you guys help?

Scorch: [kicks machine several times]

Machine: [breaks open and the contestants fall out]

-stage-

Voodoo dolls: [disappear]

Fan girls: [cry]

-lounge-

Hiei: [strangling Scorch for throwing the voodoo doll too the fan girls]

Sapphire: [punches him]

Scorch: Thank you. Do you guys know who did this?

Botan: It was the camera men!

Camera men: [walk in and remove masks to show they are ogres from Reikai]

Yusuke: You mean the toddler was behind this?!

Koenma: How many times do I have to tell you NOT to call my that?

All: [scream]

Yusuke: Damnit don't do that! We STILL aren't used to you at eye level!

Scorch: [starts strangling Koenma] I COULD'VE LOST MY DAMN JOB BECAUSE OF YOU DAMNIT!!!

Yusuke: [laughing]

Botan and ogres: [manage to restrain her from strangling him]

Koenma: Who do you think owns the station?

Scorch: [thinks for a couple of seconds and tries to strangle him again]

Botan and ogres: [manage to restrain her but only just]

Koenma: [hiding behind Yusuke] This is also why you five were the contestants.

Yusuke and Hiei: WHAT!? [try to kill him]

Hiei: You're the reason we had to sit through and answer her damned questions!?

Koenma: [now behind Botan]

Scorch: Okay. At least answer this, WHY did you steal your workers?

Koenma: I didn't STEAL them, simply added a twist to the show.

Scorch: It's my show! Sort of. You can't go doing that just because you own the network!

Koenma: But it adds suspense for the last episode of the season.

All: [fall]

Scorch: That doesn't matter!

Koenma: And it's because DMV messed with the fuse box.

Scorch: Damn him to hell!

Koenma: Anyway thank you for watching Tantei trivia. And please stay tuned for season 2.

Sapphire: Who are you talking to?

Koenma: [points to 3 cameras]

Scorch: You… were filming this?

Koenma: Yes.

Scorch: [strangles him again]

Botan: Thank you all for watching Tantei trivia. Please continue watching for season 2 and remember our sponsors.

-.-.-.-.

Psychic: Hey chumly I finished a fanfic.

Hiei: MY.NAME.ISN'T.CHUMLY!!!!!

Scorch: SILENCE CHUMLY!!!

Psychic: Thank you Scorch.

Scorch: [bows and leaves]

Psychic: Thank you everyone for your reviews and reading the story I hope you enjoyed it and so on so forth. And I really might make a season two, but I'll need some questions to ask and I want to know if I should make it like some of those other shows where they compete for points in both skill and strengths. What do you guys think? And yes I know this is the longest chapter I've written so far, minus the Jurassic Park/Yu Yu Hakusho fanfic I was typing. But NO my dad had to delete every thing on the computer!!!!!

Scorch: [throws bucket of water on Psychic] Better?

Psychic: Shut up! And thank you for stopping my ranting, AFTER I WAS DONE!!!

Scorch: You don't scare me.

Psychic: What's your point?

Scorch: Too shay authoress, to shay.

Psychic: Bwhahahaha!!! Season two! See you all later, as in, in another fic. If I write one. [sigh]