Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ The Lady of Green ❯ In which the twins lose it ( Chapter 9 )

* Note: We find our young authors in the basement (the last safe place in the house) hiding from the evil plushies and demons swarming into their house. Kurama and Hiei have joined them, and Kurama is sitting with Firelung and Icelung's mother, who is hyperventilating. Noises can be heard from above, mostly the shattering of plates and glasses, or the crack of wooden chairs being made into firewood. *

Icelung06: My head hurts…*~_~*… ouch.

Firelung06: Well, stupid, what did you expect? You've knocked yourself out 457 times since we last updated.

Hiei: You've been counting?

FL: * shrug * We have nothing better to do down here.

H: Point made.

Mom: My house! What are they doing to my house?!

Kurama: It's going to be Ok. Relax. Breathe deep.

M: * takes a deep breath * * lets it out slowly *

K: Good. Again.

M: * breathes deep *

K: Good.

FL: Uh…mom? Are you going to be Ok?

M: * is busy breathing *

IL: … maybe we shouldn't talk to her right now…?

FL: Good idea.

* A crash is heard upstairs *

All: * wince *

H: That sounded expensive.

FL: Um… Icelung… why don't you start the disclaimer?

IL: Right. I/We do not own YYH. I/We only own Noric, Nova, Ivy, Josie, Enya, Vlad, and Lucifer. The ideas for things to do in Wal-mart came from Kitsune no Kanashimi's story, Twelve Things to do in a Wal-mart.

* Shout heard from above "hey! I found a door!" * * basement door starts rattling *

All: O.O Uh-oh.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"So what's your story?"

"Huh?"

"What's your story?" Josie repeated. "I mean, how did you end up being a spirit detective?"

Yuske shrugged. "Got hit by a car one day, died, came back to life, and the Toddler says this is my way to make up for coming back to life."

"Got hit by a car?" Josie shook her head. "What a way to go."

"What about you?" Yuske asked, honestly curious.

"Me? I was a friend of Nova's when the Spirit World first contacted her. Turns out I have an `unusually high' spirit awareness. I just joined in with Nova and Ivy."

"How long have you guys been around?"

Josie took a moment to think about it. "Hmm… I'd say… two years. For me, that is. Ivy and Nova were in about a year before I was."

Yuske noticed she didn't talk about Enya. He decided to take a gamble, "so Enya was the last to join?"

"Yep."

Yuske waited for her to elaborate, but no explanations came. They walked along in an uncomfortable silence after that. Yuske began to whistle to cover the silence. He suddenly stopped. "What's that?" he asked. Further down the path the light stopped. In the darkness was a single, swinging ball of light.

"I'm not sure," Josie answered. They continued warily down the tunnel, until they hit a wall. "What the heck?" Josie murmured.

It was an invisible wall. Josie placed her hand on it. It was as solid as the rock surrounding them, but totally transparent. Behind the wall it was completely dark, like the light hit the wall but didn't go through it. A mysterious ball of light bobbed up and down in the darkness.

"What do you think it is?" Yuske asked.

"A wall."

Yuske gave Josie a sour look. "I can see that. Or can't"

"Ask a stupid question…" Josie said teasingly. She was watching the ball of light. How odd, she thought. It's not very bright but shouldn't it at least illuminate the floor or walls when it gets close to them? Suddenly the ball stilled and came close to the wall. Jose knelt down to face level with it. Yuske walked up behind her and looked over her shoulder. The orb of light suddenly started beating itself on the invisible wall, causing both of them to jump.

"Do you think it wants out?" Josie asked Yuske.

"Do you think it thinks?" Yuske retorted. Josie caught the witty sarcasm, but decided to let it slide. "Well, we can't go back, and we can't go around it…" Yuske thought aloud.

"So we knock it down?" Josie asked, looking at Yuske.

He shrugged, "I can't see why not"

"We can't see it, period."

"Good point." He looked like he was thinking about it for a moment then said, "Ok, stand back."

Josie obligingly stood and got out the way. "Why? What are you going to do?"

"You'll see," Yuske said, a cocky grin on his face. "You may want to get behind me," he added.

Josie jumped behind him. From what she had read in Yuske's file, he wasn't known for doing smart or safe things. The opposite in fact.

Yuske made a fist, and brought it back, charging his spirit energy. After a couple seconds of this he swung and yelled, "shot gun!" A thousand spirit bullets came out of his clenched fist. They hit the invisi-wall… then came ricocheting back at them.

"Oh shit!"

"Energy shield!" Josie yelled, and they were both encompassed in a bright yellow dome that absorbed the bullets as they hit.

When the last of the bullets hit the shield, Josie released it, then turned on Yuske. "YOU MORON! Are you trying to get us killed? You're just lucky Ivy beat that maneuver into my head with an iron rod!"

"I didn't know it would do that!" Yuske yelled.

"YOU DIDN'T KNOW WHAT IT WOULD DO, AND YOU STILL SHOT AT IT WITH THE EQUIVALENT OF A SPIRIT UZI!" Josie was clenching her fists to keep from wrapping her hands around Yuske's scrawny neck. Don't kill him, she told herself, you need his help. Nova would never forgive you. Don't kill him, don't kill him…

Yuske looked somewhere between ticked off and embarrassed. "Hey, don't yell at me! In case you don't remember, THIS IS NOT THE SMART PERSON TUNNEL!"

"You don't have to be a genius to have some common sense!"

Suddenly a third voice popped in yelling, "please, yell yell stopping!"

Yuske and Josie looked at each other with wide eyes thinking what the heck was that?

"yell yell stopping?" The voice repeated, much quieter this time, almost shy.

"Uh…yeah." Josie said uncertainly. "No more yelling."

"Yell yell stopping," the voice sighed, sounding content.

Yuske and Josie looked at each other with a "now what?" air.

"Um, hello?" Josie finally asked. "What… um… who are you?"

There was a moment of silence, then a soft, "Roogie"

"Roogie?" Josie repeated. "Is that your name?"

"Name Roogie. Who you who yell yell hurt poor, scared, Roogie's ears?" The small voice was slowly getting louder, almost like a child who knows an adult is wrong and is calling them on it.

Josie looked at Yuske, who shrugged. He had no idea what was going on. "My name is Josie." Josie said. (A/N: duh) "And this is my friend, Yuske." She winced slightly as she said the word "friend" but what else could she call him?

"Hi," Yuske said, kind of waving.

"Yuske. Josie." Roogie said, trying the names out with his own tongue. "Yuske make oochi many blue owies? Josie make wocha pretty yellow bowl?"

"Yes," Josie said. "That was us."

Roogie was quiet for a moment, like he was thinking, then he said, "Josie, Yuske, oochi strong. Like Roogie helping? No meanie wall, helping Roogie."

What? Josie thought, this thing is making no sense!

Then Yuske said, "you want our help? To break down the wall?"

"Owie bang Yuske right! Meanie wall, Roogie no like."

"Oy," Josie whispered to herself, "it's speaking in verse now."

"How do we break it down?" Yuske asked.

"Roogie no know. Roogie no like meanie wall. Dark Roogie no like either."

Josie found the comment about the dark a bit odd. "You're in the dark?" she asked.

"Dark, dark, dark. Roogie no see Roogie's own tail."

Yuske and Josie looked at each other with hanging jaws. "It has a tail?" Josie whispered to Yuske. Yuske shrugged, palms up.

"Ok," Josie said, "we'll help you out. But," she paused, "but you have to promise not to hurt us in any way."

"Pretty bowl Josie no like poor Roogie?" It sounded so upset; Josie couldn't help but feel sorry for it.

"It's not that I don't like you," she quickly amended, "we just need to be careful ok? So do you promise?" she tried to put as much calm and comfort in her voice as possible.

"Roogie promise." The voice said, sounding a bit better.

"Good," Josie nodded. "Now how do we get this wall down?" She walked up to the wall and ran her hands over the smooth surface. Only, it's not smooth anymore, Josie thought. It was pockmarked with small holes and dents. None of the holes went all the way through, though. "Yuske," she said, "I think your shot gun helped more than we thought."

"Wadaya mean?" he asked.

"Well, come feel the wall," she gestured for him to come closer. "It has holes in it, before it was completely smooth."

Yuske rested his hand on the wall. "Yeah, you're right." He bent down and began to run his hands along the floor.

"What are you doing?" Josie momentarily stopped looking for the biggest hole to watch Yuske.

"Looking for… aha!" he held up what looked like air.

"Air?" Josie raised an eyebrow.

"No," Yuske answered sounding annoyed. "Hold out your hand."

Josie compiled and Yuske put the "air" in her hand. To her surprise, the air was heavy, and had bumps. A physical form. "Does this mean the wall is actually solid? Like stone or some thing?"

"I've never seen invisible rocks before, have you?" Yuske asked.

Josie refrained from commenting on the "seeing invisible rocks" part of his statement, she snickered evilly instead. "So what are we going to do?" she finally asked.

"I could shoot at it again."

Silence.

"…Or not," Yuske quickly said.

The little orb of light continued to float in abstract patters on the other side of the wall. It suddenly threw itself at the wall with a vicious force. Josie heard something crack. "What the…?" she trailed off and ran her hand over the wall where the orb had hit. It was the deepest hole she had found. She could easily stick her entire hand in. A couple of good punches…she thought.

She was surprised out of her reverie by a loud thud, followed by the sound of cracking. Yuske had kicked the wall in frustration, and now it was collapsing. Josie felt the large invisible chunks fall on her head and shoulders as, from somewhere, a loud, high pitched whining filled the tunnel. "YUSKE!" she yelled, "what did you do?"

"Owie Yuske make no more bad meanie wall!" Roogie shouted excitedly.

Josie was about to call Yuske several choice words when the whining stopped and the wall completely collapsed. Then they were engulfed in a wave of absolute darkness.

There were several long moments of silence before Yuske said, "well, that was unexpected."

Josie had to try very hard to keep from throwing herself at the spot where she had last seen Yuske.

"Owie Yuske, pretty Josie, no hurting?" Roogie asked. The small orb of light, now freed from the wall, bounced closer to Josie.

"I think I'm ok…" Josie ran her hands over her arms, legs, and face in the dark to be sure. "What about you two?"

"I'm fine" Yuske said from somewhere in front of her.

"Roogie no hurting either." Roogie sounded somewhere to her right, and close.

"Now what are we going to do?" Josie asked. "We're stuck, in the dark, who-knows-how-many-miles underground, with out anything for light."

"Roogie know! Roogie helping!" Suddenly the small ball of light got brighter, so Josie had to cover her eyes. "Roogie can see!" Roogie said, sounding awestruck.

Josie opened her eyes. "Uh…Roogie?" she asked.

The, now bright, ball of light was attached to a long, supple-looking tail. The tail was attached to a monkey-like body. Attached to the body was a large, round head dominated by a pair of large, glossy eyes, one a pale blue, the other a soft milky-brown. Small, tufted bear ears adorned the top of the creature's head. It was fuzzy, covered from head to foot with multi-colored fur. Brown, red, black, and blonde all mixed into his pelt. Black fur dominated his left hand to about mid-forearm, looking like a glove. Blonde hair gathered more toward his face, around a nose that looked like a tiny black button. Josie wasn't sure what it was, but it was one of the cutest darn things she had ever seen.

"Are you Roogie?" she asked it.

The creature looked at her with its large eyes. "Roogie is Roogie." It said. "You pretty Josie?" it turned to Yuske, "and you owie Yuske?" They both nodded. "Weeeeeee!" he suddenly yelled and began literally bouncing off the walls of the tunnel. "Roogie free, Roogie free, Roogie free!" he turned and ran back to Jose and Yuske. "You save Roogie!" to Yuske's surprise, the small monkey-like creature jumped up and hugged the dark haired boy around the middle. Then he turned to Josie and wrapped his tiny arms around her legs. "Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!" He clambered up to Josie's shoulder, and perched there. "You free Roogie! Roogie oochi happy!" He hugged Josie again, this time around her head.

Josie laughed and detangled herself. "You're welcome."

"What happened to the lights?" Yuske asked as he walked toward them in the semi dark.

"I think we broke something when the wall fell." Josie looked around for a possible switch.

"Well, at least we have a light," Yuske said. "Let's move on." Josie nodded.

They walked down the tunnel asking Roogie about himself and talking about different ways to get in trouble and/or get disturbed looks from random people on the street. Yuske quickly discovered Josie was more of a troublemaker than he had first thought. It was mostly Nova who kept her in check.

"Oh! How about going into the sporting goods section of a Wal-Mart, handling the guns and casually asking where the antidepressants are?" Josie laughed to herself.

Yuske jumped in, "No, go into the dressing rooms and yell `hey! We're out of toilet paper!' or set up a tent in the camping aisle and ask people to bring pillows from the bedding section!" he laughed.

Josie grinned and said, "don't tell Nova I told you this, but once I convinced her to hide in a clothing rack with me and we shouted `pick me! Pick me!' when people walked by." She chuckled. "We were thrown out after this old woman told a clerk that the clothing was talking to her. We're followed every time we go into that store now." She shook her head, still laughing. "Poor Nova. She has no idea how much fun she's missing."

"How long have you known Nova?" Yuske asked.

Josie shrugged. "Since I was ten or eleven. I remember I had just moved in with my aunt, and she was assigned to tour me around school."

"You live with your aunt?" Yuske asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Yeah," Josie said, suddenly turning grim. "Social Services took me away from my parents when I was a kid. My dad used to beat me up and my mom was constantly telling me I was a useless whore." She sighed. "So my mom's sister, who didn't have any kids of her own, took me in. I've lived with her for the last five years." She looked at Yuske. "But it's all in the past now. My dad's still in prison on charges of battery and my mom has three months left in de-tox so she can leave and get completely faced again…" she shook her head, as if trying to rid herself of the bad memories. "Like I said, it's all over now. My aunt Toko is the most amazing person I've ever met. She and her boyfriend are planning to get married next Easter, ya know." She smiled at him and Yuske could take the hint, let's change the subject please.

"Pretty Josie's auntie getting a mate?" Roogie asked from Josie's shoulder. Josie nodded. Roogie looked from Josie to Yuske then back to Josie again. "Owie Yuske and pretty Josie mates?" He asked, a confused look in his eyes.

Luckily, Yuske and Josie were spared from answering, as the tunnel they were in suddenly shot backwards sending the two dark haired humans sprawling. The section of tunnel raced along like a car without a driver until it suddenly stopped, and began moving upward like an out of control elevator.

"What's going on?" Josie yelled, the force of the upward movement plastering her to the ground.

"Noric mentioned something about this!" Yuske yelled. "The tunnels move!" They both started screaming incoherently as the tunnel shot forward.

I'm gunna die! Josie thought, I'm gunna die, I'm gunna die, I'm gunna die! Why didn't I kill Yuske when I had the chance? I'M GUNNA DIE!

Suddenly, Josie wasn't on the hard tunnel floor anymore, she was hanging in mid air. Then she was falling. Later, she would vaguely remember hearing someone yell "what the…?!" and landing on something soft, but at the moment, she was just glad she hadn't hit the stone floor.

"JOSIE! Oh my gosh, YUSKE! Are you two all right?"

Josie opened her eyes to a lighted room and a blonde haired, brown eyed face hovering above her. "IVY!" she quickly sat up, banging her head into Ivy's. "Ouch…sorry."

Ivy rubbed her head. "It's ok… What happened to you guys in there? We could hear you screaming and then you just came flying out of the wall."

"The tunnel moved on us." Yuske said, walking up with Noric.

Kuwabara's slightly muffled voice came from the floor, "WILL YOU PLEASE STOP LANDING ON ME!" Josie quickly stood, allowing Kuwabara to get off the floor.

Josie realized then that Noric and Kuwabara were soaked. "What happened to you two?"

Ivy, Kuwabara, and Noric looked at each other. "The Guardian." They chorused as one.

"Guardian?" Yuske asked.

Noric nodded. "Apparently each tunnel has a Guardian, hence the rules. Our tunnel Guardian, unfortunately, has an odd sense of humor."

Josie opened her mouth to speak when she heard someone yell, "THERE IT IS! RUN!" She looked around the small circle of travelers and asked, "is it just me, or did that sound like Nova?"

As if to prove her point, there was a thud on the other side of the wall closest to Yuske. "Where's the door?" Nova's voice shouted desperately.

"Hurry Nova!" Kurama's voice shouted, "I can't keep her at bay much longer!"

There was scuffling sounds followed by a triumphant "I GOT IT!" and part of the wall swung open to reveal an exhausted looking Nova quickly followed by Kurama, who was lashing his rose whip.

"Shutthedoor,shutthedoor,shutthedoor,shutthedoor." Nova chanted as she and Kurama pushed the heavy stone door back into place. Seconds later there was a loud thud followed by an even louder roar.

Both stood there panting for a moment until Nova let out a mighty sigh, and fell to her knees, placing her forehead on the cool stone of the door, now wall. Kurama laughed weakly and said, "No offence Nova, but I think your brother should have come instead."

Nova turned around to lean back on the wall. "You and me both."

"AHA!" Noric swooped down on his sister and wrapped her in a bone crushing hug. "YOU DO NEED ME! Admit it! You do need me!"

"NORIC?" Nova laughed and returned the hug.

Meanwhile, Yuske said to Kurama, "good to have you back. What was that thing you guys were running from?"

Kurama shook his head and waved his hand weakly. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"Try me." Yuske challenged.

"DIRTY FUCKING TRAITOR! PUT ME DOWN!" Eight pairs of eyes grew wide as they looked at the tunnel from which the voice came. "OH NO!" some mumbled words then, "GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE!"

"That would be Enya." Ivy said, and started to giggle into her palm.

There were a few more muttered words and something about, "randomly knocking people out" before Enya emerged into a room of people laughing their butts off. She was followed by Hiei and a tall man with white-blonde hair, startlingly light blue eyes, and (Josie was shocked to see) pointed ears. An elf she thought. She had learned from Nova that all elves were similar in two ways, their unnaturally light blue eyes, and their pointed ears. Hair color, skin color, size, shape, body build, all those could be different. Just the eyes and ears were always the same.

"Welcome back you two," Nova was saying, "I think Ivy was right, we should have sent a referee." All the bystanders started laughing again.

Finally Enya got sick of it and said, "we're wasting time. We should be moving on."

Noric nodded. "She's right, let's keep moving."

They all filed into a haphazard line with Nova and Noric in the front and Josie and Roogie settling into the back to talk to the elf.

"So what's your name?" Josie asked him. "And how did you end up with those two?"

The elf opened his mouth to answer but was interrupted by Enya yelling, "LIKE HELL YOU WON!" And hitting Hiei in the nose with her fist. Hiei fell on his butt, nursing his (freely bleeding) nose and, probably, Josie figured, is wounded ego.

Josie, Nova, and Ivy all exchanged worried glances before they started laughing. It was funny, but they had reason to worry. Enya, Josie thought desperately, you can't revert now. We'll need your help now more than ever, and you may be able to find a way to pay Nova back. Stick with us Enya, please.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

* Evil Demon Army (EDA) and Evil Plushies (EP) are now in Firelung and Icelung's basement sitting on whatever they can find *

IL: Whew! Long chappie!

FL: Longer than most the others.

ED1: that chapter sucked!

EP1: you made more spelling mistakes than a second grader!

IL: * eyebrow twitches * that's what spell check is for.

ED2: I can't believe lady VAOH actually likes this story!

ED3: Me neither!

EP2: Yin-Jins has no taste!

* EDA and EP generally start complaining and fighting *

* FL and IL get angrier and angrier *

FL: * finally loses it * ALL RIGHT YOU LITTLE SPAZOIDS! SHUT UP AND PAY ATTENTION!

EDA&EP: * silence *

FL: YOU ATE ALL OUR FOOD, YOU DESTROYED OUR HOUSE, YOU SENT OUR MOTHER INTO PANIC ATTACKS, AND NOW YOU INSULT OUR STORY!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

IL: * deadly calm * Say hello to my little friend! * Holds up a blow torch*

* Mom comes out of hiding in closet carrying her sewing box *

M: * holds up sewing box * Let's see how much Yin-Jins likes her plushies when they've got their heads connected to the wrong bodies… * shark grin *

FL: WHERE'S MY SWORD? * Pulls out massive broadsword * Let's go to work * smiles in Oh-my-God-she's-going-to-kill-me mode *

EDA&EP: * gulp * RUN AWAY! * All scatter *

M: OH NO YOU DON'T! GET BACK HERE, MISTER!

IL: * waving around a flaming blowtorch * MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

FL: TAKE THAT! AND THAT! ALL SHALL FELL THE WRATH OF THE TWINS!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

K&H: O.O meep. Review.