Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ The Lord of the Rings: The Fellows ❯ Introduction ( Prologue )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

The Fellows

Satsu: The “FELLOWS”? Where the heck did we get “The Fellows”?!!

Kit: ^^ I never got to finish writing “The Fellowship of the Ring”!

Satsu: X_x Right. Start it, then.


~*This is a spoof we came up with while playing a game where we cast YYH characters as LOTR characters. ^.^ *~

*Disclaimer: ONE – we don’t own YYH characters. TWO – we don’t own the LOTR plot. THREE – yes, there are height differences to the original LOTR characters, but not everyone can be as short as Hiei. And plus we don’t care.*

~Authors’ Note: The actual fanfiction is about the YYH cast filming the movie Lord of the Rings. When you see ~~~~~~~~~~, it’s the signal for the camera turning on or off. So, it starts with the camera off, and everything between the ~~~~~~~~~~’s is what’s on the tape before it gets edited. That is, IF it gets edited. Get it? Got it? Good.~

CAST
Frodo - Yusuke
Sam – Kuwabara
Merry – Jin
Pippin – Chuu
Legolas – Yoko
Aragorn – Kurama
Gimli – Rinku
Boromir – Hiei
Sauron – Yomi
Saruman – Karasu
Elrond – Koenma
Gollum – Shishi
Arwen – Botan
Galadriel – Keiko
Eowyn – Shizuru
Bilbo – Sakyo

CREW
Directors – Satsu and Kit
Camera – Kuronue
Lighting – Kuronue
Sound – Kuronue
Special Effects – Kuronue
Costumes – Kuronue
Casting by – Satsu and Kit
Makeup – Kuronue
Set – Everyone listed except maybe Sakyo and Shishi


CHAPTER ONE: Introduction

Kit: Alright, everyone ready? Positions? Good.

Satsu: ACTION.

~~~~~~~~~~

Keiko: The world is changed. I feel it in the water. I feel it in the earth. I smell it in the air. Much that once was is lost. For none now live who remember it. *TITLE APPEARS* It began with the forging of the Great Rings.

~*insert forging of the Great Rings*~

Keiko: Three were given to the Elves: immortal, wisest and fairest of all beings.

~*insert giving three Rings to the Elves*~

Keiko: Seven to the Dwarf-lords: great miners and craftsmen of the mountain halls.

~*insert giving seven Rings to the Dwarves*~

Keiko: And nine, nine rings were gifted to the race of Men…

~*insert giving nine Rings to the Men*~

Keiko: …who, above all else, desire power…. HEY! THAT’S NOT TRUE! DEMONS ARE PRETTY POWER-HUNGRY TOO! THAT’S WHY THEY DON’T GET ANY RINGS! HIEI, KURAMA, I’M TALKIN’ ABOUT YOU!

Kurama: *whispers* Keiko, we’re filming.

Keiko: Oh. Right. Sorry. *cough, cough* For within these rings was bound the strength and will to govern each race… GEEZ, HOW LONG DOES THIS SPEECH GO ON ANYWAY? I’M TALKING THROUGH THE WHOLE MOVIE!

Kurama: KEIKO!

Keiko: Oh, right, sorry. *cough, cough* But they were all of them deceived.

~*insert all of them being deceived*~

Keiko: For another Ring was made.

~*insert another Ring being made*~

Keiko: In the land of Mor… uh, Mor… Mor… Mordor? Is that right?

Kurama: *nod, nod*

Keiko: Right, thanks. In the fires of Mount Doom… wow. That’s a stupid name. Waaay too cliché.

Kurama: *handhead* KEIKO!!!

Keiko: Sorry! *mutters* Well, it IS. *cough, cough* In the land of Mordor…

~*insert land of Mordor*~

Keiko:…in the fires of Mount Doom…

~*insert fires of-

Kit: STOP WITH THE INSERTS. WE GET IT.

Kuronue: *sigh* FINE. Ruin my fun.

Keiko: Ahem. In the land of Mordor, in the fires of Mount Doom, the Dark Lord Yomi forged in secret a Master Ring to control all others. And into this Ring he poured his cruelty, his malice, and his will to dominate all life. One Ring to rule them all. One by one the Free Lands of Middle-earth fell to the power of the Ring. But there were some who resisted. A Last Alliance of Men and Elves marched against the armies of Mordor. And on the slopes of Mount Doom, they fought for the freedom of Middle-earth.

Orcs: *growl*

Army: *fires arrows*

Orcs: *fall*

Kit: OKAY. THIS IS WHERE WE GET LAZY AND JUST WRITE “insert battle scene”.

Kuronue: But you said not to do the inserts.

Kit: *glare* I’M TELLING YOU TO NOW.

Kuronue: *glare glare*

~*insert battle scene*~

Keiko: *cough, cough* Victory was near. But the power of the Ring could not be undone.

Yomi: *STOMP, STOMP* Yo.

Humans: *back away* O___O

Yomi: …FINE. DON’T RESPOND. IS A “HELLO” TOO MUCH TO ASK?! ;-; *takes mace* *swipe*

Humans: *fly back dead*

Yomi: *kills… kills… kills…

Kit: O.O

Satsu: *looks at script* AAH! WE DON’T HAVE ANYONE TO PLAY ISILDUR’S DADDY!

Kit: OR ISILDUR!

Satsu: *grabs two random people*

Amanuma and Mitarai: O.o’ Eh?

Kit: *quick pep talk* Mitarai, you die.

Mitarai: But I don’t wanna-

Satsu: SHUDDAP. Amanuma, you be Isildur. You chop off Yomi’s FINGER. Muahaha.

Yomi: O_O *gasp* But… but…

Satsu: He’s not REALLY gonna do it, it’s computer animation.

Kit: *whisper* But they ARE computer animation.

Satsu: …oh.

Yomi: I DON’T WANNA LOSE MY FINGER! ; ;

Satsu: WE’LL DRAW IT BACK.

Keiko: AHEM.

Yomi: *kills Mitarai*

Mitarai: @_@

Keiko: It was in this moment…

Amanuma: *gasp*

Keiko: …when all hope had faded…

Amanuma: *drops to Mitarai’s side dramatically* *sob*

Yomi: *whispers to Amanuma* Is he really dead?

Amanuma: Of course not… he’s merely unconscious. ^^

Keiko: *glare* SHUDDAP!! *cough, cough* …that Amanuma, son of the King, took up his father’s sword.

Amanuma: *grabs sword*

Yomi: *stomps on sword*

Sword: *doesn’t break*

Yomi: …Oo *stomp* … *stomp* … *stomp stomp stomp stomp STOMP*

Satsu: >> << *runs to sword* *picks it up* *breaks it* *puts it back * *runs back*

Yomi: ……..*looks at sword* MUAHAHAHA!! *reaches hand towards Amanuma*

Amanuma: *dramatically yells* *tries to lift sword* Oof! *strain* *fume* Yomi, a little closer.

Yomi: *sigh* *brings hand closer*

Amanuma: *strain* Bit more.

Yomi: *anger mark* *brings hand closer*

Amanuma: *dramatically yells* *cuts off ring finger*

Yomi: OWWW!! FRICKIN-

Kit: NO, YOU DON’T TALK!!

Yomi: ;.; Owie…

Satsu: *whispers to Kuronue* CUT!

~~~~~~~~~~
Satsu: Yomi, move!

Yomi: *runs off set* *gets ice* *puts it on stump of now cut off finger*

Kuronue: Uh, right. *does fancy animation crap on the camera* *turns it back on*

~~~~~~~~~~

Yomi on camera: *blows up*

Real Yomi: *hears/senses* O__O *gasp*

Humans: *fly backwards*

Keiko: *cough, cough* Yomi, the enemy of the Free Peoples of Middle-earth, was defeated.

Amanuma: *takes ring*

Keiko: The Ring passed to Amanuma, who had this one chance to destroy evil forever. But the hearts of men are easily corrupted.

Amanuma: *wearing ring on chain* *on a horse* ^^ YAY.

Keiko: …and the Ring of Power has a will of its own.

~*insert Amanuma’s death scene*~

Keiko: It betrayed Amanuma…

Amanuma: *gets shot with an arrow* OW!

Keiko: SHUSH. *resumes dramatic voice* …to his death.

Ring: *floats down to the bottom of river* *SHINE*

Kuronue: O__O SHINEY!! *jumps into river*

Kit: No!! @_@

Kuronue: <~drowning

Yoko: *walks in set* Guys, where- *sees Kuronue* HAHAHA! YOU IDIOT! YOU CAN’T SWIM!!!

Kit: HE CAN’T?!! *jumps* CAMERA MAN!! *SPLASH*

~*five minutes later*~

Kit: <~drowning also

Satsu: BAKA, YOU CAN’T SWIM EITHER!

Keiko: CAN WE GET ON WITH IT?!

Kit: *finally drags Kuronue out* *pant* I think *pant* we need a *pant* sub.

Satsu: Yeah, I’m hungry too. After the intro we’ll eat. KEIKO, HURRY UP!

Keiko: *mumble, mumble* *cough, cough* And some things that should not have been forgotten were lost. History became legend, legend became myth, and for two and a half thousand years the Ring passed out of all knowledge. Until, when chance came… it ensnared a new bearer.

Kuronue: *back on camera* *moves it to film Shishi’s hand*

Shishi’s hand: *not there*

Rest of Shishi: *also not there*

Satsu: Shishi? Shishi? SHISHI?

Shishi: *somewhere else* *eating*

Satsu and Kit: …

~*fifteen minutes later*~

Shishi: *walks in door*

Kit and Satsu: SHISHI! YOU’RE ON!

Shishi: …O.o YOU SAID I WASN’T IN THIS MOVIE!

Kit: We lied.

Satsu: ^.^v

Shishi: *mumble mumble* *goes to set* *grabs Ring* My precious.

Keiko: *cough, cough* The Ring came to the creature Shishi, who took it deep into the tunnels of the Misty Mountains. And there it consumed him.

Shishi: It came to me. My own. My love. My own… THESE ARE RETARDED LINES. >> << My preciousss. *perks head up* *cough* Shishi, shishi.

Keiko: The Ring brought to Shishi unnatural long life. For five hundred years-

Shishi: FIVE HUNDRED YEARS?!

Keiko: SHUT UP!!! *slap* Ahem. For five hundred years it poisoned his mind. And in the gloom of Shishi’s cave, it waited. Darkness crept back into the forests of the world. Rumor grew of a shadow in the East… whispers of a nameless fear. And the Ring of Power perceived… its time had now come.

Ring: *fall, cling, clang, clung*

Kuronue: O_O SHIIINY. *lunge*

Kit: *restrains* Down, Kuro. Down. Bad boy.

Kuronue: *whine* Crap.

Keiko: *COUGH, COUGH* It abandoned Shishi. But something happened then that the Ring did not intend. It was picked up by the most unlikely creature imaginable.

Kit: …SAKYO. YOU’RE ON.

Sakyo: *runs in* *pick sup ring* What’s this?

Kieko: A Hobbit. Sakyo of the Shire.

Sakyo: A ring.

Shishi: *screams* LOST! My precious is lost!

Sakyo: *pockets ring*

Keiko: For the time will soon come when Hobbits will shape the fortunes of all… *rips of script* IN A NUTSHELL, an evil ring was made by this evil dude who got his finger cut off, and this ring goes from person to person lookin’ for that dude. Now this little short dude called Sakyo’s got it. And that’s-

Yomi: YOU WERE GONNA DO AN “IN A NUTSHELL”?! I DIDN’T HAVE TO GET MY FINGER CHOPPED OFF? *cries*

Kuronue: *staring at Sakyo’s ring* Can I have it now?

Kit: No. *thwack* And you’re taking all those mistakes out later.

Kuronue: *pout* Fine.

Yoko: *dying from laughter*

Keiko: AHEM. And this is where our story beings… I need a break. I’ll be in my trailer. *runs off crying*

Kuronue: *cuts tape*

~~~~~~~~~~

END CHAPTER.