Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ the Shadows that Bind (marina's finest work) ❯ Hiei chapter: Dieing in his wake ( Chapter 17 )

…I feel… horrid…

Because she has tried to write this so quickly, she almost got a detention ON HER BIRTHDAY

…that's why I couldn't post this up… and on weekends I'm at home, and at home I'm not allowed on the net very often.

She posts up at school…

Sorry this chappie is a bit late… but I tried to keep it on time.

I think this may go into R later… I'm not entirely sure,

It's because if she does she shouldn't even be writing this

…yeah… anyways… This may be one dark chappie… enjoy…

Disclaimer: I own nothing but Maku, demon slayers and shadow mistress/masters

The darkness… all consuming, it was all around you, swirling ,and haunting, yet it didn't exist… but it did… but it didn't… even so… it allowed you to fall… and yet float… its grip tight around you… suffocating you, yet you did not earn release with death…maybe you were already dead… but you couldn't be… something told you that you weren't… the pain was numbing your mind… your senses… all that filled your mind was the pain Hiei had caused you…

Give into the darkness… and you shall be released….

You could not answer, your mind screamed out no, but your lips were not moving… you had no strength… nothing left within you… than the screams… the torturous screams began… who were they? You couldn't place who they belonged to, but… they were familiar… and they hit your mind like a thousand knives, echoing through out… you wanted to scream, but no sound uttered over your lips…

They will stop if you give in…

You stayed with no… you may have wanted release, but you knew… that the voice was really promising you death…

Than… be tormented…

The screams were cracking away your insanity… and you felt it starting to slip… but than, you felt warmth, and comfort surround you, and the screams stopped… You looked to see what had stopped them, but all you saw was a blur of black and red, as whoever had saved you left… Why did they leave you?

"Thanks… whoever you are…" you whispered, knowing they could hear you as your voice echoed through the darkness.

He saved you again… at every turn he stops me…

"Wha?" you frowned into the darkness, and…felt deepest pain through out yourself… it tortured every cell of your being… your essence… all of you… and than, there was nothing…

Hiei's POV

Why? Why do my actions always get interpreted this way? I saw it all in her mind… pain… anguish… but why should I care? She's just a ningen… no… a ningen who is the vessel for two demons… making her unworthy of my time, if Koenma wasn't holding the keys to a spirit jail cell… I would have killed her by now!

But… but even when I try to hurt her, something just… stops me… why is this… feeling so… intoxicating!?

I thought I had eradicated such things from my soul many years ago… Have I grown soft? I looked down upon her limp, frail body… she looked so weak… so vulnerable… but... her face… she was so pale…

I knelt beside her and put my hand upon her cheek… she was cold… had I saved her in her mind too late? Was she… was she? No… she was stronger than that… and why should I care if she is gone? Koenma can… no… her soul was being tortured… not her physical being… her… no… she couldn't have lost herself… she had to be stronger than that! She had to be!

I picked up her life less body, her head lolled on her shoulders…

She must be… dead… NO! she… she must just be unconscious… she must be!

I held her torso against my chest… and used all my powers to try and warm her… to try and being her back to life, back to me… why was I so attached to this, girl? I have been so strong before! No one can go into my heart… but in her eyes… she seems to… to understand… but... but that's impossible, she can never understand, never…

She's not warming up… why… why isn't she warming up? I can't have lost her! I can't!...why am I so afraid I have lost her? This… this makes no sense… her last impression of me, was… to her… rejection…I wanted to… stop myself from hurting her, and in the process… I… I've killed her… the realisation stung at me, and I looked down into her dull, lifeless orbs…

The old effects that used to captivate me… the lovely brightness within her eyes, the shimmer of mischief… Why did she love me? ME? Of all people, she could have loved Kurama… but she loved me… and I wasted that… I took it for granted, thinking she would always be there…and that my feelings, and her own would disappear…

But… it is to late for anything… not one little word of kindness… I never said anything good to her… and… she didn't want to look weak in front of me, but she couldn't keep up the act… and now her part in this play of life was over… and before my last line I wished to tell her… but why do these feelings linger? Her face… so pale now… still makes me feel… but… but WHY? I stroked over her cheek… she was as perfect as ever… and I was a baka and let her go… I let her down… I leant over her body, and wept into her chest… and I heard the slow… but steady thump of her heart…

THUMP OF HER HEART!

I pulled back from her, and tried to think of what to do, I had to pull her soul back… I had to make her regain consciousness… she's alive… and I'm not going to let her slip through my fingers, like I let Cevena… I felt a tear escape my eye… and it materialised into a gem… a dark… perfect gem… I had never seen my own tear gem before… it was black… as black as my soul… than I remembered… it was like her own tears… ____ cried the same tears…

Was she no different to me?… no… she could not be… she was so perfect… and I… nothing… nothing but a pale shadow cast by the strong but fickle light of judgment…

No… I have no time to brood upon my own faults… I must save her… and now… I took off my bandanna and began…

There was nothing but darkness… black… and swirling,

"____!!!" I yelled out, my voice echoed all around me, did I really sound like that? So… harsh… cold… and unforgiving… is that what she heard when I spoke? I heard a faint reply, her faint cry of pain… and I searched for her, in this dark abyss of sorrows… following her screams of pain… her torturous voice… if I wasn't able to save her… I knew they would haunt my dreams for all eternity… than, her screams stopped… and I knew… she was on her last breaths… I moved faster than I had ever run before… and I found her… she was existent… that was all… floating on nothingness… and her features and body were distorted with darkness… and yet she still looked perfect… like a flower… so delicate and frail too… I ran to her, and wrapped my arms around her once again… she didn't react… there was nothing… had I been to late this time?

She is alive, fool… but only just…

"Who's there?" I growled into the darkness, there was a chuckle, sinister… and dark…

Foolish mortal… you have no idea, do you? You do not understand…But you must one day…

"What the hell are you talking about!?" I yelled, my voice echoed loudly through the darkness, and the voice replied again…

Cevena… Yuniku…_____... do you not see?

"What is there to see?" This voice was strange…

So much, Jaganshi… So much for you to see…Cevena and Yuniku are entwined with ____... three people… one ultimate destiny… ____ will live…. For now… until they come for her on the full moon… she will live…

"What the hell do you mean, baka?" I hated being toyed with like this…

"Hiei?" It was her… her voice… she had returned… to me…

Normal POV

You slowly opened you eyes, and saw him holding you, Hiei… he had saved you again from the darkness…

"Hiei?" he looked down into your eyes with his red ones, they were wide with surprise,

"___?" his eyes hardened back to their normal state… there was nothing you could gain from them… And the darkness dispersed… away and…

You felt soft, warm breathes upon your face… the owner smelt like pine… and… something else…

"____?" a familiar voice questioned, you felt a soft touch upon your cheek… and you opened your eyes, and saw Hiei looking into your red eyes… a sigh escaped his lips, of relief… than he looked away from you… why did he always do that?

"…Hiei… thanks…" you whispered, you had forgiven him, for now… he had saved your life, and in your mind... it was worth something..

"Hn…" he seemed to be in deep thought, trying to decide something… but what? It plagued at you, as you took in your new surroundings, from what you could guess… you were behind a waterfall, its roars resounded around the cave, the stone cavern was damp… and mossy… but the air felt fresh, and good… you sighed, and got up, the silence that had fallen was starting to scare you, and you felt the need to know what he was trying to decide…

"Hiei, what's on your mind?" you asked, he looked back to you, and scowled, "Come on, you can tell me, or you'll regret it!" there was a flicker of something in his eyes… and he smirked…

"Figures you would help make my decision for me…" he looked right into your eyes, and pierced through,

"What do you mean?" you whispered unable to look away… he pushed you down to the ground, hard. He was on top of you, and he was straddled around your waist, his arms pinning your own to the side. Your demonic instincts kicked in, and you struggled to get away from him, terrified… he tried to stop you, but to no avail, and just as you were about to break free, he transformed… his body turned green, and eyes opened all over his body, he smirked down at you, as you looked to him, stunned… so… he was the one who had tried to buy the shadow mistress… or at least the one inside you…

"I thought you would fight back with more spirit ah well…" you glared at him, and struggled to get out of his stronger grip, but to no avail, it was useless to waste the rest of your energy… and you stopped… he moved one of his hands to your neck, and forced your head to one side to expose your neck, you closed your eyes, and felt his lips over your neck, and his fangs probing for a certain point, a weak spot perhaps… and stopped, a fang lightly pressed on a point, and his mouth left your neck for a moment… and than you felt them plunge hard into your neck, you opened your eyes wide with the pain… it was coursing through you, his fangs pierced in, it felt like millions of daggers were twisting and turning through your neck, moving deeper, and deeper… what was this for? Why was he hurting you? What had you done?

He's only marking you…

'Marking, me?' you thought to yourself… so… he was marking you? Making you his property? His territory, his… mate? All this pain… was to tell you... he was in control…he was the master now… The pain seemed to last for ever… it went on and on… until he slowly pulled his fangs out, you felt weak… and afraid…

"Don't be so afraid, baka… I won't use you in your condition…" his tongue licked over your wound, it was rough… but soothing… should you trust him? Why was he marking you? Didn't he reject you before? It made no sense… but nothing did anymore… his hands stroked through your hair, he was so gentle… but why? But than again… if you questioned this, maybe you would lose the only time you would ever really have with Hiei… like this… You felt calm… knowing it would all be fine… something told you it would. He stopped licking over the wound, and kissed your lips, his tongue forced entry into your mouth, tasting you... exploring his new territory… and slowly pulled back, and licked his lips, as if savouring your taste. His hands… lets just say they roamed a bit… and you realised you were only in your one-piece swimming costume, and him in board shorts… his bare torso pressed against yours… and you immobile… drained… Hiei was impulsive, and controlling… there was no telling if he would want to go farther… "Why are you so scared? Isn't this what you wanted?" he whispered, he nibbled your ear, you smiled, pleasurably.

"Just… a bit scared…" he smirked,

"I could have guessed… you do still have a ningen mind… and all of this is new to you…" he kissed over the mark,

"Naduh…" you laughed slightly, and Hiei shook his head, and sighed,

"I have to fall for a baka… don't I…?" you growled,

"HEY!!!" he smirked,

"Did I hit a weak spot?" he snickered,

"Hn…" you glared at him,

"…Ah well… you're my weak little baka… and nothing can change that…" you sighed, he stopped straddling you, forced one of your legs around him, and you didn't like that…

"Hiei!" you glared… he smirked, his body was so close… and the intoxication began… every little touch from his was like ecstasy… and it made you sweat… because you could do nothing to quench your lust… nothing at all… his lips pressed hard against your own… no more gentle play… he knew what he wanted, and it was all at his fingertips… but hadn't he said he wasn't going to use you? But wasn't that what he was doing? Suddenly, all you could feel, was a numbing pain, and darkness pulled you down… and maybe this time… you wouldn't escape…

…I know… I know… it isn't that good…

…darkness… angst…confusion…despair … I LIKE IT!!!!

…and that's meant to make me feel better? Well... anyways REVIEW!!!