Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Yu Yu Hakusho Bloopers ❯ Chapter 11 ( Chapter 11 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Yu Yu Hakusho Bloopers: Chapter 11

By: Cece Williams

((Disclaimer: I don't own YYH, and I never will. Don't sue, cause you can't get nothing from me.))

Cece: Another chapter of bloopers for the fans who love this stuff.

Yusuke: And another DVD to add to her collection.

Kurama: Expect a lot of bloopers from the YYH DVD “Bandits and Kings” in this chapter, along with some from the two movies.

Cece: Read on.

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(From “Poltergeist Report” - after Kurama gets hurt)

Koronue: Goodbye, old partner.

(Koronue starts to disappear, but reappears again)

Koronue: Oops, forgot my pendant.

(Laughter on the set)

Director: Cut!

(Episode 103 - another reason to laugh at Yusuke)

Yusuke: YOMI! You stupid blind freak! You hear me; I'm coming over so bring us some hookers!!

(From Gandara, Yomi and Kurama laugh so hard they hit the floor)

Hokoshin: Lord Yusuke, why would you need hookers?

Yusuke: I dunno…

(Laughter on the set)

Director: CUT!!

Kurama: Sometimes I wonder about Yusuke…

Director: *rubs her temples* I do, too, Kurama. I do, too.

(Episode 108 - Sha na na na, na na na na…)

(Kurama walks out to the area near the ring and looks up at the ring. Looking back at eye level, Kurama sees from the dust cloud...)

Kurama: Yomi. *looks again* Why are you dressed like that?

Yomi: *flips the cape behind him around his face* I'm… Batman!

(Laughter on the set)

Director: Cut! Who stole Yomi's actual outfit?

Kurama: I don't think you want to know.

(Episode 103 - Father/son talk)

Yusuke: If you need to eat humans to survive, so be it. I can bring you some - some really evil ones.

Raizen: Could you bring me Charles Manson? And maybe some sex offenders?

Yusuke: I'll bring back some drug dealers, too.

(Laughter on the set)

Director: Cut!

Youko: Don't be talking about me.

Director: Youko? When did you get here?

Youko: After I heard Yusuke talking about drug dealers.

Director: Yusuke, you weren't talking about Youko, were you?

Yusuke: Nope.

Director: Good.

(Episode 103 - Father/son bonding… I think)

Yusuke: So, what'd you do?

Raizen: We made love.

(Yusuke nearly gags as Raizen laughs)
Raizen: There was no other choice, what could I do?

Yusuke: Hey, kids watch this show, too!

(Laughter)

Director: Cut! Raizen, I'm sorry, but this is PG-13 for a reason.

Raizen: What did you want me to say? “We made hot, passionate, steamy…”

Director: *covers her ears* I GET IT ALREADY!!

(Episode 102 - Kurama's got a brand new bag…)

Yomi: I'd like to make you my new second-in-command, if you'll accept it.

Kurama: *takes out his PDA from his hair* Let me think about that for a second.

(Jin and Chuu laugh while Kurama plays on his PDA)

Kurama: Can we talk about this on Friday at 10AM? That's the only time I'm open.

(Laughter on the set)

Director: Cut! Kurama, where did you get that?

Kurama: Radio Shack.

Director: How did that fit in your hair?

Kurama: *winks at her slyly* I have my ways.

Director: Something tells me I shouldn't have asked.

(Episode 102 - same scene)

Yomi: I'd like to make you my new second-in-command, if you'll accept it.

(Kurama looks through a magazine)

Yomi: Kurama? I didn't know you read Cosmopolitan.

Kurama: *stops reading* What?

(Kurama looks at the cover and face faults)

(Laughter on and off the set)

Director: Good Lord! Cut! Kurama, that's my magazine!

Kurama: So, that's why I couldn't find anything worth reading.

Director: Keep it up, Shuichi Minamino, and your hot little tush is going outside with the fangirls.

Yusuke: *offset* Dun dun dun!

Jin, Chuu, Sazuka, Rinku, and Touya: Oooh…

Shishi: *singsong* Someone's in the doghouse…

Kurama: *sweatdrops* So sorry.

(Episode 102 - Shachi and Kara… with Kurama in the wings)

Shachi: *speaks into a phone* It's Shachi, are you getting this?

Kara: WHAZZUP?!?!

Kurama: Whazzup…

Shachi: Whazzup…

(Laughter on the set)

Director: What are you guys on, speed?

Shachi: I think I did some crack before this scene.

Director: You guys are something else.

Kurama: Is that a compliment? *fox-like grin*

Director: No.

(Episode 111 - Yusuke sure does wake up at the most inopportune times)

Yusuke: So, where are we now in the tournament? Is it the semi-finals yet?

Kurama: *had just walked in* No, Yusuke, the tournament is over.

Yusuke: You mean I slept all that time?!

Kurama: Not the first time that's happened, I'm sure.

(Laughter on the set)

Director: Cut!

(Episode 111 - Enki sure has his priorities straight…)

Enki: I'm only enforcing one great law. *clears his throat* My law is that there will be a McDonald's on every corner!

(Yusuke busts out laughing while Kurama and Hiei look at him in confusion)

Kokou: How can you think of food at a time like this?!

Enki: Well, every growing demon needs to eat…

(Laughter on the set)

Director: Cut! Although that's a really good idea.

Kurama: I'm treating.

Director: In that case, I want a large McFlurry, a #1 combo, a Dr. Pepper…

Kurama: You can't eat all that!

Director: I've done it before.

(Episode 111 - Kurama sure needs a non-yaoi line here…)

(Hiei tosses Kurama his tear gem)

Kurama: Hiei. I can't accept this. I value our friendship and all we've been through. But I'm interested in you that way.

Hiei: *sweatdrops* Kurama! I'm NOT going to sleep with you!

(Laughter on the set)

Director: Cut! Hiei, this is not a yaoi scene!

Hiei: Then why did he say that?

Kurama: It was in the script!

Director: Okay, Kurama. How about this: “But, we can't be seen together in that way.”

Hiei: That's even worse!

Director: Just drop it!

(Episode - Open mouth, insert foot)

Shishi: Tsk, tsk, tsk. Don't you think you're forgetting about somebody?
Yusuke: Look, it's NSYNC!

Onji: *breaks out in song* You're all I ever wanted…

(Kurama and Hiei try REAL hard not to laugh)

Shishi: Onji, what the hell are you doing?

Onji: Getting my voice on.

(Laughter on the set)

Director: Cut!

Shishi: I can't work like this. I'll be in my trailer.

(Makintaro and Shishi walk off the set)

Onji: Come on, guys! I wasn't that bad!

(Yusuke and Kuwabara laugh on the floor, with Kurama holds his ribs, still trying not to laugh)

Onji: You guys suck! *leaves the set after Shishi and Makintaro*

(Episode 52 - why do I get the feeling this is NOT as easy as it looks?)

(Wind blows seeds out of Kurama's hand)

Kurama: That wind, it's stronger than before. Someone is in serious danger.

(Screams come out of the woods and Miroku, being chased by Sango, comes out of the woods)

Miroku: All I asked was one question!

Sango: And your hand on my butt again!

(Kurama sweatdrops on the set)

Director: Cut! Miroku, Sango, you're not on the right set!

Miroku: *sees Director and grabs her hand* Will you bear my children?

Sango: *hits him upside his head and drags him off* She doesn't want you!

Miroku: *while being dragged off* Call me!

Director: Everyone, take five!

(Episode 102 - Chuu on the tightrope)

(Chuu starts walking on the tightrope and takes a drink with the others watching. Chuu slips on the tightrope and hits himself between the legs.)

Chuu: *obviously drunk* That was ripper…

(Laughter on the set)

Director: Cut!

Jin: That looked like it hurt.

Rinku: He's used to it.

(Episode 57 - Not exactly the best way to resolve anything)

Juri: I won't talk to you. Not until you learn to how to keep your grubby fingers to yourself.

Yusuke: I'll put my grubby fingers through your face unless you tell me how the hell the breathing guy loses!

Juri: *gets in Yusuke's face* Weren't you even watching the damn fight, you idiot?!

Yusuke: What's that gotta do with it?

(A microphone gets thrown at Yusuke and knocks him out)

Director: Cut! We need a medic!

Kurama: Why does Yusuke's mouth overshoot his brain?

Director: Your guess is as good as mine.

(Episode 112 - Complaining, complaining…)

(Kuwabara, Kurama, Keiko, and Shizuru walk up the steps to Genkai's temple)

Kuwabara: Are we there yet?

Kurama: No.

Kuwabara: Are we there yet?

Shizuru: Shut up.

(Laughter offset)

Director: Cut!

(Kuwabara plops on the steps and drinks water)

Shizuru: I wonder who is dumber: Yusuke or you.

Keiko: Huh? What are you talking about, Shizuru?

Kurama: Never mind.

(Episode 84 - Kitsune instinct or something else?)

Elder Toguro: Thanks to this lard I can absorb any power I want! I'll start with yours! *starts running like a maniac over to Kurama*

(Kurama whistles and steps out of the way, letting Elder Toguro hit the cave wall)

Elder Toguro: *face in wall* Ouch.

(Yusuke, Sensui, and Itsuki bust out laughing while Mitarai and Hiei wonder what the hell is so funny)

Mitarai: Mister Kurama, why did you move?

Kurama: I don't know.

(Laughter on the set)

Director: *laughing so hard she falls out of her chair* CUT!

Elder Toguro: Speaking of cut, can someone get me out of the wall?

Everyone except Kurama and Mitarai: Nah!

(Episode 104 - Someone needs a Kleenex)

(Jin sneezes, sending the door in front of them down to the floor)

Yomi: *doesn't even turn his head* You're paying for that, Kurama.

Kurama: Jin!

Jin: Allergies.

Kurama: Oh, no. Don't blame them on me!

(Laughter on the set)

Director: Cut!

Kurama: Benedryl?

Director: Nah, just some Claritin for right now.

(From “The Golden Seal” - One wrong line…)

(Yusuke almost hits the lava before Botan grabs his arm above his wrist.)

Yusuke: We got to stop meeting like this.

(“Ooooooooooh's” come from offset)

Hiei: He's still an idiot.

Director: Cut!

Koashura: He's an imbecile.

Director: Great minds think alike.

(Episode 102 - Master Genkai strikes again)

Sazuka: After that embarrassing loss against the old bitch…

(Spirit blast hits Sazuka and knocks him into the wall)

Kurama: That's going to leave a mark.

Director: Cut! Sazuka, this is PG-13 for a reason!

Sazuka: It's “The Beautiful Sazuka,” little girl. Get it right.

Director: *obviously miffed* Little girl?! Oh, that's it!

Kurama: *looks at the Director with a sweatdrop* I think we need to move.

(Everyone except Sazuka moves out of the way while the Director tackles Sazuka and knocks his head into the ground)

Director: I'll show you a little girl, pipsqueak!

Kurama: *rubs his temples* Where is Master Genkai when you need her?

Chuu: I know a bar we can go to.

Shishi: *snaps a picture of the Director beating up Sazuka* I'll join you.

(Chuu, Shishi, Rinku, Touya, and Jin leave the set while Kurama pulls the Director off of the now-beaten up Sazuka)

Kurama: Do we need to take our Prozac today?

Director: Be a darling and get that for me.

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Cece: Another chapter from me.

Kurama: Cece's got a new job, so these chapters might me few and far in between.

Cece: R&R everyone!