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| "Yume" Reviews/Comments [ 4 ] | Title: Intriguing
Reviewed By: Selenide88 On: June 01, 2006 09:58 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
A very intriguing start so far. You have a very captivating style of writing; it's very enjoyable. The use of POV depicts the characters very well, especially Kikyou. So far I'm entranced and I can't wait to see where you lead this story, it has a great deal of potential. Keep up the amazing work! :D Take it easy!!!
| Title: Chapter 1 Review-FFRG
Reviewed By: misslady [MediaMiner Member] On: August 29, 2005 23:27 CDT
Comment/Review:
So far this is a good start to a story. It is a bit confusing at first from whose point of view this is written in. I do like that it is written in present tense and flows beautifully. Kikyo is in character which is good. Thank you for the good beginning and please keep up the good work. Misslady
| Title: FFRG review Ch.1
Reviewed By: devildice708 [MediaMiner Member] On: August 04, 2005 06:08 CDT
Comment/Review:
Thanks for submitting this to FFRG. It's not everyday that you see people try the present-tense narration much less pull off so smoothly, and for that, I applaud that. Each word was descriptive and I could picture everything. Kikyo also seemed to be in character as well, though this is just the first chapter. The only problem I saw was that you spelled "youkai" wrong about once or twice as well as "hanyou". Also, sometimes you go into details that aren't really relevant, but it isn't all that noticeable. Other than that, I like it very much. I hope you submit more chapters to FFRG!
| Title: Amazing, haunting beginning
Reviewed By: swasdiva On: August 03, 2005 22:32 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
This is probably the most promising, most darkly alarming fic I've read in a good long while. I'm utterly absorbed in the potential written in this story. Your style is succinct and biting, perfectly atune to Kikyo's present personality and accurately depicting her POV. This triangle, is it going to blur so badly that mere emotional tugging becomes literal and physical? To be more blunt, are they *all* going to end up together, if you know what I'm sayin'? The very idea is both disturbing and downright alluring. I'm eager to see where this dark idea takes you. Please write more soon!
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