| "Black Market" Reviews/Comments [ 3 ] |
Title: isabella?
Reviewed By: feifiefofum [MediaMiner Member] On: December 15, 2005 02:03 CST
Comment/Review:
you're right, there's something about this chapter that doesn't sit quite well with the previous chapter. they got a new job, killing the gabriel character and all, but who is isabella? she reminds me of that assassin that chloe killed, the poisons one with the funky nails. i expected to see more of monique. other than that, i thought mirielle and kirika slept together. the first chapter had a more noir-ish feel to it. there was a sense of the normal and the dark that was nicely blended to paint the story. this one seemed a little quick in throwing the reader into the deep end. but that's my opinion.
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Reviewed By: soulsword [MediaMiner Member] On: October 19, 2005 18:13 CDT
Comment/Review:
in response to the postive feedback (^_^) is the following message: this is a one-shot for the moment since it's written for the contest, which is a one-shot contest. i hope to continue it once the contest is over.
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Title: one-shot!!?
Reviewed By: feifiefofum [MediaMiner Member] On: October 19, 2005 11:00 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 7 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
loved the gory descriptions, they were delicious! however, i do have a bone to pick with you... WHAT THE HEY DO YOU MEAN ONE-SHOT!!? this could be so much more... please don't dump this fic... pretty please?
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