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| "Opal" Reviews/Comments [ 22 ] | | Pages (2): [ « < 1 2 ] | Title: Ahh, kirei..
Reviewed By: Cloaked Vampire [MediaMiner Member] On: February 18, 2006 17:35 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Ahh, so beautiful, as usual ^^; I just thought I'd give you another review XD Well done!!
| Reviewed By: Maya N On: February 15, 2006 22:51 CST
Comment/Review:
i really love this story!! your doing such a great job!! i really cant wait for the next chapter!! please update soon!!!
| Reviewed By: azndr3amer [MediaMiner Member] On: February 14, 2006 18:08 CST
Comment/Review:
WOW! At first I chose other fanfics over this because the summary didn't seem all that good, but now that I've read it, I really wish I'd gotten to it sooner ^^. It's a great, creative story! You put a lot of detail into things that matter...and if you make lemon scenes, I can't wait for those -.^ hehe. love your story and I hope you update soon!
| Reviewed By: sglily-nli On: February 13, 2006 19:29 CST
Comment/Review:
What a nice surprise to see this story here while I am suffering from DT's since THE OTHER site is experiencing major problems... Nice chapter! I loved how Ryou woke up and decided to plaster his lips to a sleeping Bakura... delicious! I was rather surprised by Bakura's reaction. I thought you were teasing us... I thought maybe ole' Bakura would join Ryou in the shower... heh heh. But, that's OK. I liked that Bakura kissed his human before Ryou left on his mission. Seems like Ryou wanted more... The mission itself was interesting and gruesome. Good job, Ryou for pinning the crime on someone else... Looking forward to Ryou's return and the reaction from his new "family".
| Reviewed By: kuramaishotlikehell [MediaMiner Member] On: February 08, 2006 03:06 CST
Comment/Review:
Oh wow! Please keep updating!
| Reviewed By: Paniwi [MediaMiner Member] On: February 05, 2006 07:15 CST
Comment/Review:
yeey, an update! Nice chapter, poor Ryou, it seems that the counsil wants to get rid of him as quickly as possible. I would've liked to see some more training and maybe a portion of the meeting though.
| Title: nicely done
Reviewed By: paniwi (NLI, am I ever?) On: February 01, 2006 10:34 CST
Comment/Review:
I just read the whole thing, and I'm really excited about it. You bring in a whole lot of inventive ideas, such as the bed, and how the ship looks, you deepen those things out where most writers wouldn't. Also, I find the personality's you've sketched really nice, especially Ryou's. Hooray for Ryou's who aren't made out of sugar and are sarcastic. The only negative thing I can think of is perhaps that you could try being a bit more in depth with your characters. For instance, Ryou could act, or think for that matter, a bit more traumatized about having seen a mass murder of those he knew/loved. When you let him cry about it, it seemed a bit distant, when reading a story, the reader should have the idea of being drawn in, and sharing emotions with the characters, not the feeling that they are just onlookers. Above advice is a bitch to achieve, I know all about it, but if you write more and put your heart in it, especially read alot of other books and fic's you'll see that in time you'll become better in it. All in all this is really good!
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