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| "Consequence" Reviews/Comments [ 2 ] | Reviewed By: Aoi Mitsukai [MediaMiner Member] On: March 03, 2007 11:45 CST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I don't usually read these stories, but I truly enjoyed this one. I like how it didn't go right out and say what Jounouchi had done, focusing on him trying to find a way to let one of his friends know and which friend. I enjoy reading these kinds of stories where the author doesn't outright say what the character had done, but lets you use your owm imagination. Great one-shot, I enjoyed it.
| Title: FFRG Review
Reviewed By: Kari Izumi [MediaMiner Member] On: October 07, 2006 01:41 CDT
Comment/Review:
Hi! I saw this on the old thread of unreviewed fanfiction that had been cut from the review, due to lack of man power, but I felt like I should review it after reading it from there :) I'm sorry no one got to you sooner. The one really, REALLY strong point is the characterization. Honda and Jou and Anzu were all very much like the characters we all know form the show, and you remembered that Jou and Honda used to be gangster (well, Jou was, at least. I'm not a hundred percent about Honda, but I'll assume you're right). The plot itself would make for a very strong teaser of a chapter fanfic, but as a one-shot (which I know you wanted this to be), it'a little bit on the vague side. We know Brent is an a$$ and all, but is there more to the story? Does Jou have feelings for Anzu? (I was sensing "yes"). If you don't trust yourself to make this into a chapter fic, you could dig a bit more into Jou's mind about what he did and why without havign to add another entry. The overall descriptons of the action that's going on is some of the best I've seen in this fandom. You do have a pretty strong sense of story flow, and that's very good. Overall, I liked this story idea, but I think it wouldn't hurt to add on to this concept a little more. If you are afraid of it being too much like a soap, you can get a beta that will be happy to point out if your fic is or isn't going that direction. It's a good story idea. :)
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