Reviewed By: akito_darkangel On: July 21, 2009 02:20 CDT Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10 Spelling & Grammar: 6 of 10 Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10 Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10 Overall Rating: 6 of 10 Comment/Review: You write well, and you have really interesting, insightful and funny ideas, but you end all of your fics very abruptly. I can't tell you how it feels to be reading along, really enjoying yourself, and all of a sudden come to an ending where one character says something to another and then the story leaves off, and we never get so much as a hint at what the other character might have been feeling or planning to say; whether the events that came next were good or bad. I mean, when I say abrupt, it's like... *really* abrupt. Like running into a brick wall. The other fic I read, Edge, I actually had to sit there and ask myself if that really was the end or if I was hallucinating. So... basically, you have amazing potential, and your stories are wonderful in just about every way, only... could you please try to work on a more fulfilling ending for your readers, or if you're planning to continue the fics then at least say "to be continued" at the ending of the chapter? If you're not sure about what should happen next, then discuss it with a friend or ask on writing advice websites or something. But don't leave off just having Vegeta say "Yes, I know how you feel about what I said" and then that's it! It's a really big let-down for people who read your stuff. And just so you know, this is not a flame, I'm not trying to be mean to you. As I've said above, I really enjoy your writing. I just thought I should offer this bit of constructive criticism and thoroughly explain my reasoning behind it because it occurred to me that maybe you really didn't know how it is for those who are reading your fics. Anyway, in every other aspect you do brilliantly and I know that you can be great if you continue to work hard. I hope that you continue to post stories in the future, I'd love to see some more stuff from you. ^^
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