| "Shadow Leaf Dance" Reviews/Comments [ 42 ] |
| Pages (3): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 ] |
Reviewed By: j0 On: October 16, 2006 18:03 PDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 7 of 10 Comment/Review:
Very well done! I love the pairing, and the plot. Because, however, I feel the need to include some constructive criticism, I'll enlighten you as to what I think could be improved. The sex wasn't described in enough detail. You could use more descriptive words to describe teh secks. Like, "hot wet passage" or "slippery cunny". You know. Makes it easier to imagine, and thus makes it more enjoyable. Your job isn't to recount a story of how people had sex. Your job is to weave a tapestry of sights, sounds, feelings, characters, plots, etc. into this story, and make the reader feel like he or she is *there.* I look foward to seeing more from you! Keep it up!
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Title: Excellent!
Reviewed By: Dark Z On: October 11, 2006 07:53 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 7 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Blimey! That has to be one of the hottest Naruto lemons I've ever read. I'm stunned. I mean not only was it incredibly graphic, with nearly every major sexual act included, but your story design was excellent incorporating realistic character development. Hinata and Naruto's reaction were in character, but altered through the use of propper plot devices. wow. Not to mention that you used Naruto/Hinata... my all time favorite Naruto combination. Hinata... Anko... Toys... Naruto... But don't forget, Naruto knows Kage Bushin, and Sexy-no-jutsu ;) More! MORE! Please write more stories! Thank you!and Best of luck! -Z
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Reviewed By: Sokar the Destroyer On: October 08, 2006 23:22 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Kickass. That about sums this fic up. Although it would be nice to see a sequel to this. That would probably make this even better.
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Reviewed By: Trinneko On: October 08, 2006 23:18 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I am exceedingly happy that I decided to read this fic instead of sleep, it was more than worth it. I would love it if you wrote a sequal or something, it would be interesting to see what would happen if poor innocent shino-kun found out about their 'special' relationship. Keep writing.
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Reviewed By: XIII Orginization On: October 07, 2006 08:11 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Simply genius.
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Reviewed By: Talker On: October 03, 2006 19:00 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
the way the lemon was writen is quite exciting to say the least, it aso makes me think that their could be a sequel that could include another (young) kunoichi in their relationchip like Hanabi or another girl finding out about it and being included into the relationchip, no time lapse specified depending on the girl. But aside that it is a great story that i took pleasure in reading if for nothing else then the way the fic was writen
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Reviewed By: Miyuutsuu [MediaMiner Member] On: October 03, 2006 12:25 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Hawt damn! That's what I call a great lemon fic!
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Reviewed By: Zendura [MediaMiner Member] On: October 03, 2006 10:35 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Great storie, and quite a fasinating premise. You might even merit a continuence.
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Title: Whoa
Reviewed By: Fu Mon Chu [MediaMiner Member] On: October 02, 2006 17:33 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Wow. Rx7 can certainly spot talent. Very good lemon scene. Good authors of any type of story, be it fanfiction or original, have a certain flavor to their writing. In my opinion you have shown that with some practice and polish you could easily compete with some of the great authors out there, fanfiction or otherwise. I would particularly enjoy seeing a novel-length story from you. Just develope a compelling story line and your style of writing would easilly make it something I would follow. The way I'm talking I make it sound like the easiest thing in the world to make a compelling storyline. I have seen plenty of good story ideas abandoned or trampled into the ground by horrible authors, ones who just didn't have that "thing" that "style" that could take their ideas to new hights. I think you have what it takes. I think you have the style to do justice to any story. I'm definitely adding you to my favorites list and I can't wait to see more.
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Reviewed By: til On: October 02, 2006 17:09 PDT
Comment/Review:
what about the book she stole from kakashi? whatd he do, did he find out? besides that LOVED IT!!!
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Reviewed By: entorl On: October 01, 2006 17:37 PDT
Comment/Review:
i was kinda skeptical when i first decided to read this but i was far from dissipointed, there was a kinda witty humor involved and a good ending. Good Fanfic!
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Reviewed By: ttestagr [MediaMiner Member] On: October 01, 2006 11:40 PDT
Comment/Review:
Gold. Its good to see this up, and on my favorites it goes.
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| Pages (3): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 ] |
