| "The WhiteFire Alchemist" Reviews/Comments [ 10 ] |
Title: (if you don't recognise me, you should)
Reviewed By: Sontara On: June 07, 2007 16:55 CDT
Comment/Review:
HEY CAR-CAR !!! HOW ARE YOU??? THIS IS LIKE A LITTLE CHAT ROOM HUH? gotta luv the animals.
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Reviewed By: hiya24 [MediaMiner Member] On: March 15, 2007 03:46 CDT
Comment/Review:
ok, so you've got an ok start, just update and don't leave us on cliffhangers for months on end =)
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Reviewed By: shikiori(nsi) On: January 11, 2007 16:31 CST
Comment/Review:
Ignore what everbody else says. YOU ARE CAR-CAR, THE ALMIGHTY SHORT PERSON WHO EVERYBODY CAN'T STAND! Uh, yeah,so I reveiwed like you told me too. And why don't I get mentioned? I was the one who introduced our group to FMA in the first place. Oh well, tho I hate to say it, it is a g g gr gr gr gre grea grea greasy story. Sry, meant G$#^#^R@#$@&E@#%@#A&^%&^%T story.
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Title: Okay
Reviewed By: xXx_Wings_of_a_demon_xXx [MediaMiner Member] On: January 09, 2007 21:15 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 6 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 7 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 5 of 10
Overall Rating: 7 of 10 Comment/Review:
I have to be realsitic, I'm not seeing any plot line forming at all. It all looks like pointless drabble, lined up in a row. If I could see where the story could go, or if It had any hopes of improving, I might have rated a little better. But the honest truth is that It needs a lot of work. If you added less dialogue, made the chapters longer, Put some good old description in and made your own plot, I would rate a little fairer. Please, I'm not trying to be mean, I'm offering fair critisism, so please build on it. I don't want you to take any of this personally, I'm sure that your a great person! Keep working on it! =^^=
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Reviewed By: Beverly On: January 03, 2007 08:12 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 1 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 1 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 5 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 4 of 10
Overall Rating: 3 of 10 Comment/Review:
HI Car! I am at school, on the computer! I forgot my user name! you told me to weite a review, so I am. Hurry up and write more!
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Reviewed By: X09-C On: December 18, 2006 15:15 CST
Comment/Review:
HA HA!!! I was the first person to read 6th chappie!! so thrilling, and Ed an dAl finally Met with Kaori and Ahmi! What will happen? WHO KNOWS!!!!!! Except you of course. Good story, write more! (By the way, now you can't get mad at me at school>)
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Title: Write More!!!
Reviewed By: Mao-Mao [MediaMiner Member] On: December 16, 2006 17:56 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE it!!!!
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Reviewed By: X09-c On: December 09, 2006 16:36 CST
Comment/Review:
HE HE i am mentioned! by the way, xXPEARXx and me are the same person, just lettin ya know. bood story, luv the kitties!!!!!! X3
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Title: Wow.
Reviewed By: Kaoriel(NotLoggedIn) On: December 09, 2006 13:01 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I love it so far! My only advice: Make chapters longer XD
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Reviewed By: x09-c On: December 09, 2006 06:15 CST
Comment/Review:
awwwwwww, you didn't add the part about there being 13 kitties. oh well good story! LURV IT!!!!!!XD E-mail: McDKdz2@AOL.com
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