Reviewed By: Sassa, too lazy to log in On: April 11, 2007 08:20 CDT
Comment/Review:
I don't mind the change of hearts, but I'd want it to be a bit more emotional. Perhaps you could write "Miroku knew Kagome was asleep by the way her breath slowly fell on her pillow. He had seen it many nights before, many enough to learn it". Or that Kagome sought his gaze when returning only to find he waited for it. Or that Kagome woke up, recognizing his presence. Something to show this was nothing sudden, but something that had been growing a while. That would make it even sweeter, I think. Good job still!
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