Title: um..uh...yeah Reviewed By: Laa_girl(not sighned in) On: April 22, 2007 22:39 CDT Rating(s):Style of Writing: 6 of 10 Spelling & Grammar: 4 of 10 Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10 Enjoyment Factor: 2 of 10 Overall Rating: 4 of 10 Comment/Review: okay so this is agreat effort but i must say all in all i am really! really!confused, forever everyone has been writing the kyo and other role prospect but the thing is it has been done, i do like the way you go about it but you see you need more detail in your writing it lack that element and also the element of linking one event to the other, and how do you get email on a plane and how does Akito find out in a split secong that she knows the secret? this in itself makes no sense but to add to it you have no origion of setting, place and time kind place and time! i have no idea where you are going with this! it seems too look like you have a million ideas floating areound in your head but you are not putting them into order so that they make sense! please continue writing without it the world would loose it prospective, but take what you lean from others and use it to better yourself along the way....there is what i have to say, no harm meant no harm done, i sincerely hope! may you fill the earth with words.. Laa_girl
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