Reviewed By: RadioActiveRedhead [MediaMiner Member] On: June 16, 2008 21:17 CDT
Comment/Review:
Your writing is very smooshed together. You need to space out your "speech" between characters. For reference to what I mean by spacing out the character speech, check out a fanfic of mine when two characters are talking to one another. Other than that it doesn't look bad... Just remember spacing and not making the paragraphs TOO big. :) Goodluck!
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