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| "The Storm That Broke Fourth Wall" Reviews/Comments [ 2 ] | Reviewed By: JNVermont On: September 13, 2007 23:58 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I didn't enjoy this piece from the beginning. Rather, it got better as it went along. It started out softly with so many pauses, so much dilly-dallying before getting into the boat, that i wanted to give up on it totally at first(My fault- a lack of patience)and walk away, i am not very familiar with this genre. Then i felt the first drop of comedy touch my cheek. A splash spraying later on over me caused a giggle. Finally the storm of laughter that followed had me rolling on the floor in guffaws, unable to harness my mirth. The climax couldn't have suited the story better, nor been more timeley... too much more and i would have ruptured a stomache muscule. My all-time favorite line? "Toby's idea of `better' was, by little stretch of the imagination, to not have the constant urge at the present moment to go to the bathroom. (He was sailing on it)." And the line about the pee. Way to go out like a bang... just like a hurricane.
| Title: Muuuuch Better
Reviewed By: Project 0506 [MediaMiner Member] On: September 03, 2007 11:18 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Yosh, much better. Your natural aversion to dish-washing comes out beautifully Lu-chan, and you have done well in following Prachet's and Snickett's tones. Now all I have to do is get you to read some Douglas Adams and the world will be a funner place! The fourth wall was effectively broken, keep it up!
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