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| "The Smiling Mask of ANBU" Reviews/Comments [ 15 ] | Reviewed By: SomeoneRandom On: July 29, 2009 19:27 CDT
Comment/Review:
I loved it!!! Naruto is amazing please update soon!!
| Reviewed By: moonshinewish [MediaMiner Member] On: May 29, 2009 23:55 CDT
Comment/Review:
Awsomeness!!! Can't wait for the next chapter. I imagine by now Saukra is running in circles on seeing both her teamates hurt (mainly Sauske)and not knowing what to do and will soon faint because of this. Keep updating you've got me hooked. Ja ne ^_^
| Reviewed By: kikilee On: May 21, 2009 17:51 CDT
Rating(s):Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Please update soon i'll go insane if you don't!^_^
| Title: Fire Water Burn ~ Bloodhound Gang
Reviewed By: GoblinKing2112 [MediaMiner Member] On: January 11, 2009 00:03 CST
Comment/Review:
NEW CHAPPIE!!! ::eye-twitch:: I never thought I would say 'chappie' before. OH NO! Naruto-kun has been stabbed by the Kusanagi! Now his regenerative abilities will take half an hour to remove the toxins, instead of half a minute! Stupid butt-hurt Uchiha, unless he proves to be loyal to the Great and Magnificient, and might I add handsome, Naruto-kun, I will personally drown him in stomach fat! Keep up the good work, and writer's block sucks more balls than every Power Ball Lottery Machine and Bowling Ally combined. Ja Ne. The Goliath's Commandment - They never expect you to move after you (supposedly) accidentily decapitate yourself ~ Hanicas on teaching young regenerators how to catch their opponents off-guard, with combat footage of Hanicas decapitating himself with a chainsaw, then shooting tendrils of muscle from his neck to pull a squad of special forces cyborgs into his stomach for digestion (extradimensional pocket + Level 9 Bio-Hazard Acid + lamprey like rings of shredding teeth). Penguin + Top Hat = mehh!
| Title: I got a Tiki God
Reviewed By: GoblinKing2112 [MediaMiner Member] On: November 09, 2008 21:52 CST
Comment/Review:
YAY! Though chapter 9 is still messed up, I discovered that by using select all and pasting it to a word document it will copy the missing text. Didn't think of doing that till now. I didn't even realize that Kabuto telling them about Lee was treasonous. The problem is is that in the anime noone outside of team 7, team Gai, and Kabuto remembered that little fact. Or else they thought it was a bit of misinformation. Especially if he was an expert at Ninjutsu and/or Genjutsu (that sunset that appears behind Gai is commonly considered an ultra-strong Genjutsu that cannot be defeated in anyway), he would spread that around as they would expect one thing. Counter-misinformation though is what it would be in Lee's case, as only schizophrenic paranoids would actually believe he was a Taijutsu expert, every other skilled ninja would think he had far greater talent in Ninjutsu/Genjutsu. That would mess them up, now wouldn't it? Keep up the good work. The Goliath's Commandment - Society is but a Rollercoaster of Incompetence and Imbecility ~ Hanicas on known money-grubbing fucks like Jeff Merkley being elected to political positions
| Reviewed By: blue wolf On: November 03, 2008 12:50 CST
Comment/Review:
It wss hard to read ch. 9 can please fix . other then that it is great. please keep up the story thank you
| Reviewed By: not logged in currently On: October 29, 2008 15:49 CDT
Comment/Review:
If you know naruto's mother's name how come you didn't us his father's real name? His mother's name was released (oficialy in the manga) after his father's real name.
| Reviewed By: GoblinKing2112 [MediaMiner Member] On: October 21, 2008 00:24 CDT
Comment/Review:
A new chapter. Very good, though it is a bit short. But hey, it's better than "Haku walked into the clearing and Naruto decapitated him then burned his corpse and went back to sleep". One sentence covering ~5 minutes of time. Keep up the good work, and beware of Fangirls. Because of Naruto Fan Fiction I am frightened by Fan Girls. The Goliath's Commandment - Our name is Goliath, and we are Legion
| Title: More dakka, you crakka
Reviewed By: GoblinKing2112 [MediaMiner Member] On: October 12, 2008 05:23 CDT
Comment/Review:
Meaning, more shooting/fighting/decrapitation (yes, de-CRAP-itation, where in your bowels loosen IMMEDIATELY upon being harmed in any way, including death), you white boy (general perception that all fanfic writers are white males, either stupid teens or creepy middleaged dudes that look like child molesters; I am neither, just a disordered 21 year-old male). Very good I must say. And I laugh at Kakashi's inability to realize that Naruto is most definitely not a gennin (even I can tell when comparing his actions to other ninja; more fearless than most chunnin that appear in the anime). Oh well, keep up the good work. And decrapitate was a mispronunciation my older brother did that stuck. The Goliath's Commandment - Our resolve is Adamantine, and no evil shall stand before our righteous might! Woah... my shortest review yet...
| Reviewed By: ChibiInu20 On: May 21, 2008 16:43 CDT
Comment/Review:
PPPPPPPPPPPPPLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSS SSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEE update PPPPPLLLLLEEEEEAAAAASSSSSEEEEE..............please
| Reviewed By: FieldOfEternalSnow On: February 26, 2008 07:14 CST
Rating(s):Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
I really like this story. You're doing a great job so far :)
| Reviewed By: GrayPheonix [MediaMiner Member] On: February 08, 2008 22:43 CST
Comment/Review:
FUCK! And that was a cool chapter so far! Wait, tha means the next chapter, would Naruto have to deal with Team assignments? Shit, I want to hear his reaction to being assigned to help train Sasuke in a sideways manner, by being his rival? MAAAAAN! Okay, that idea just makes me laugh. Anyway, thanks for the chapter, ja ne.
| Reviewed By: blackbloodedangel On: February 07, 2008 23:37 CST
Rating(s):Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
YOU HAVE GOT TO UPDATE THIS WHENEVER YOU CAN!!!!! i mean i love this story its so thrilling that i cant get enough of it!!!!!!!
| Reviewed By: GrayPheonix [MediaMiner Member] On: January 18, 2008 22:09 CST
Comment/Review:
Hmmm, a good start, but there are problems. FOr instance, you seem to jump from moment to moment between paragraphs, going an in determinant amount of time between scenes. Not the best idea. Prepare some way to separate scenes, either a line of dashes, or something else. In addition, I DO like your characterizations. Like I already said though, you jump around too much, and you also need to work on your descriptions more. Even though we already know what everything looks like, show the scene, all the small details, facial expressions, placement of objects, what objects are in a room. Keep that in mind, especially for the Hokage's office, you haven't described it, or shown the piles of paperwork! Anyway, I do like the story, and I want to read more. SO UPDATE!!!! Ja ne.
| Reviewed By: Soliderboy [MediaMiner Member] On: December 14, 2007 08:39 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Wow first one to give a review it's good update soon.
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