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| "Chained World: The Fall of the House of Kuno" Reviews/Comments [ 7 ] | Reviewed By: darkinudemon [MediaMiner Member] On: September 19, 2013 13:12 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
What can I say but…WOW! But before I get into the details, I want to start by letting you know a little about myself to help put this review into context. My pen name is Darkinudemon, and I’ve been a fan fiction enthusiast as long as I can remember. By now I’ve probably read more stories than I can count, and even written and published a few of my own. Like everyone else I have my favorite story types and favorite authors, and out of all the stories I’ve ever read over the many years I’ve been reading, this is the first one that I’ve ever felt I couldn’t move on from without leaving one. This has to be the best story I’ve ever read, and Ranma ½ isn’t even one of my top three genres. The plot was beyond exceptional, with a dark quality that only the real world possesses. Each twist and turn had its own unexpected dynamics that all but forced myself to kept reading, and while like with almost every story the outcome can all but be predetermined this one did everything right in keeping the reader from knowing until the end just exactly how it would turn out. The individual character development was great without needless waste, with each person reacting as one would expect in real life and a person’s ability to overcome was astounding. The single greatest gift you gave readers was your willingness to kill off so many or the main characters was something I’ve never seen before. While I might of disagreed with some of those deaths (mostly Ukyo), each death truly had meaning despite how anticlimactic (Konatsu, the Amazons, and even to some extent the Master or Servants) to the sacrifices Genma made protecting the Tendo’s and his wife when he finally fell in the battle. Your continuing ability to accurately show each additional the mental scar such traumatic events would cause is beyond equal right up until the very end. Alas, this brings me to the first of only two negatives I could find in such a work of art and both take place in the final chapter (40). First off, I felt the chapter was rushed and as such somewhat inconsistent, but make no mistake even this chapter was good. I felt you easily closed out every character’s thread except the two that truly mattered, and this was my biggest disappointment… The simple fact is unlike every other character Ranma never woke up, and as such no one was able to grasp the totality of the emotional scarring this whole ordeal caused. I don’t know if this was done on purpose (since you’re writing a sequel) or not. I’m glad that you’ve since started addressing that major shortcoming in what you’ve posted so far in the sequel ‘Saving Grace’ and look forward to future postings of that story. Lastly the second negative, (I can only shake my head as I write this since it clashes with the belief that you intently didn’t bring a conclusion to Ranma and Akane’s relationship) was the part again of chapter 40 where Sailor Pluto steps into the Time Gates at the of the chapter. I have to say this was completely botched… If you truly were planning a sequel and was waiting to address Ranma there, you shouldn’t have even broached the topic here. If instead, you hadn’t even considered the sequel then it was a train wreck of epic proportions. As you’ve yet to reveal the full extent of the trauma Ranma is still suffering in the sequel I don’t have much to offer in constructive criticism. The only thing I can suggest to fix it would be to be nowhere near as specific as you were to the when she was viewing the near future, leaving it clouded to help transition into the sequel (maybe except for maybe the part of the spires and towers of Crystal Tokyo, though I’m not a Sailor Moon fan so I don’t know the true meaning of that reference). Regardless of how the sequel works I’d still like to see a resolution to the Ranma/Akane rel | Reviewed By: Moton [MediaMiner Member] On: March 17, 2012 05:32 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Thank you for a very interesting read, been following it since the start and am very glad you kept to it till the end. Well, to this climax at least. You started off with an original uchronia concept and developped it to its "natural" conclusion. At least that's how it felt reading it, and it's not something many writers achieve. | Reviewed By: Neihaera On: January 15, 2012 13:21 EST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
I've found this to be an extremely engrossing exploration of a very disturbing topic - slavery in the modern world. The body count, frankly, is a bit high for my own preference, but at least you haven't committed the far more common sin of soft-pedaling the whole issue. | Reviewed By: terri v On: December 06, 2011 06:32 EST
Comment/Review:
I've enjoyed your tale so far and can't wait to see what happens to everyone in the aftermath of the attack. What I'm most looking forward to is what Ranma does to Kuno and his retainers. | Reviewed By: graypheonix85 On: May 29, 2010 02:28 EDT
Comment/Review:
Hmmm, an interesting read so far. Dunno if I like the concept (kinda crass really) but well written if nothing else, and definitely worth reading more of. Continue to update, ja ne.
| Reviewed By: Anon1 On: February 08, 2010 19:02 EST
Comment/Review:
---So Kodachi is semi-sane? Who knew . . . I doubt Kodachi has much love for her brother, so despite the blood, I wouldn't be surprised to find her quite willing to aid in any murder plans when the time comes to kill Kuno. Happy writing, and update soon!
| Reviewed By: ANON1 On: January 16, 2010 00:52 EST
Comment/Review:
---Damn . . . could you maybe consider writing a spinoff where Setsuna wins? I was actually looking forward to see what she had in store for Ranko . . . Or maybe you could have her by Ranko after the Kunos are killed off? That would be a happier ending for everyone. Happy writing, and update soon!
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