"Tempting" Reviews/Comments [ 2 ] | Reviewed By: m_nakita01 [MediaMiner Member] On: July 01, 2010 10:01 CDT Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10 Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10 Originality/Creativity: 6 of 10 Enjoyment Factor: 7 of 10 Overall Rating: 6 of 10 Comment/Review: Hmmm... More interesting than the the first chapter, but not quite captivating. I feel a little bit weird about David -- sure he may be young, but the fact that he's already intrigued with Ella and smirks and stuffs makes him seem just a little bit sleazy to me. And Bennet and Bingley? Is this a modernization of Pride and Prejudice or something? LOL, jk. I have a feeling that as David gets more involved with Ella, she's gonna end up liking Eric and David's gonna be jealous...
| Reviewed By: m_nakita01 [MediaMiner Member] On: July 01, 2010 09:19 CDT Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10 Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10 Originality/Creativity: 7 of 10 Enjoyment Factor: 6 of 10 Overall Rating: 7 of 10 Comment/Review: Not bad for a first chapter. Things are going slowly so far, but you write well and I appreciate your proof reading efforts. There was one thing I didn't get though -- after David met Lizzy and offered to take him to his class, you wrote that David followed Claudia. I don't know if that was a mistake, but if confused me a little. Besides that, sounds good. Keep it up ;)
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