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| "Pride, Pomp, and Circumstance" Reviews/Comments [ 5 ] | Title: Good Start
Reviewed By: J Luc Pitard [MediaMiner Member] On: June 29, 2010 09:45 CDT
Comment/Review:
This story has a gritty feel, with Kagome being as roughed up as Inuyasha. Liked the way she confronted the three guys. Could've used a tad more detail about them. Once we learn from Inuyasha that the three were youkai (nice touch getting his side of the confrontation) I started to wonder more about them. Perhaps more will be revealed later? The flashback was creepy and makes me want to learn more of the back story. Good luck in the military!
| Reviewed By: Kawa-Misuterii [MediaMiner Member] On: June 27, 2010 23:52 CDT
Rating(s):Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Comment/Review:
Hey, I'm really enjoying this fic, here, but I think you accidentally used the pre-write instead of the final copy towards the end of the second chapter... at least it seemed that way. Just thought you should know.
| Reviewed By: SplendentGoddess [MediaMiner Member] On: June 27, 2010 11:32 CDT
Comment/Review:
I can understand how "real life" gets in the way of writing stories, so no worries if you've got prior obligations. Just promise you won't straight up abandon this fic! If I have to wait until the end of summer for it to get continued that's okay, just so long as it gets continued. Good luck with everything!
| Reviewed By: theknightcallsmyname [MediaMiner Member] On: June 24, 2010 21:07 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Really enjoyed this first chapter. I'm so glad Inuyasha is hanyou in your story - I enjoy AUs but I don't care for the ones where he is human like everyone else. So huzzah for your first chapter of your first fic - hope you'll be able to continue it to the end because it looks to be very good.
| Reviewed By: SplendentGoddess [MediaMiner Member] On: June 24, 2010 18:44 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Okay, first off, sorry to hear about all your formatting problems. I've heard other people say that too, but I've always used rich text and have never had a problem. Sometimes it'll do something weird, like turn bold all of a sudden, but I've figured out what causes that and how to fix it when it happens. Anyway, onto more pressing matters. Wonderful start! I'm really liking where this is going! While I've seen the more generic version of "Inuyasha heals Kagome" done a few times in the past, I've definitely never seen a Kagome with more or less an Inuyasha-like personality, ready to take those thugs on, and just basically shielding herself from the world. I don't think she realized they were youkai from the way she ran the attack plan off in her mind. Come to think of it, does she even know about youkai? But she definitely has super-human senses, feeling the vibrations in the street from the people leaving the restaurant, sensing Inuyasha's aura as he approached her from behind... And then of course there's the whole Kikyou connection. It's too bad Inuyasha missed catching what Kagome actually said, because he doesn't even realize there is a connection yet. This is a really, really good start and I certainly hope you continue with this story. I'm tagging it as Favorite. :-)
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