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| "To Freedom" Reviews/Comments [ 2 ] | Reviewed By: Xeshitha . . On: May 30, 2011 23:13 EDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
WAIT! It wasn't the end!? I thought that was the end! D= --- But it wasn't! :D. Which I'm glad for. I fairly liked the story. It SOUNDED like the end, cliffhanger, does he or does he not escape? Nice cliffhanger end. But it wasn't! I actually skipped two chapters, wondering, who are those masters and everything. I was just like, "...I don't remember these guys." And yes, I had come back to read it, so that says something. I really liked the last chapters! I love the brethren, and how they're treated more nicely. I can't wait for the next chapters ;o | Reviewed By: Xeshitha [MediaMiner Member] On: February 09, 2011 13:49 EST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 6 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10
Overall Rating: 7 of 10 Comment/Review:
This was sick. And the thing I hate most about myself is that I am never phased by things like this. XD. Kill a thousand virgins and sacrifice little babies, repeat the Holocaust or whatever you want, and I'm just all... the same, not phased, nothing. Personally, I have no interest in rape. And definitely not Yaoi, but I knew torture would be in here, and that's what made me click. Some would puke at this or whatever, but it doesn't seem so bad. The torture was pretty mild... but it was entertaining to read nonetheless. On with the comment. You could explain the thoughts of the protagonist more. I never really heard of them at all. You didn't go into detail with what he was thinking. The only thing you did was describe everything else - which, if I might add, you have amazing detail. This was horridly long considering the concept/theme of this story, but that's good. I love detail at all times ^^. Your writing isn't powdered or anything. You make it somewhat interesting without all of those fancy words with bunches of comparisons and so on. And that's good, too. The only fix I see that you need made done is going through what the character is thinking. I can understand at some time he just stops thinking, really, becoming broken from all of that. But in the beginning, I think he would be thinking a lot. And though I know this probably isn't about the characters at all, I liked the poor girl that was trying to protect her little brother the most. I don't know why. I just liked her personality. No I'm not a pedophile and no I don't like rape... if you thought that... 'cause, I really, really hate it. I'm just saying I liked her character. She made me think of some anime/manga kind of character. And maybe that makes no sense, but yeah... |
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