Reviewed By: eshfemme [MediaMiner Member] On: January 08, 2006 00:58 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 1 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 7 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 1 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 1 of 10
Overall Rating: 1 of 10 Comment/Review:
WTF? I can't tell which is your fic, as the writing seems to be broken up between the summary box and the actual body of the chapter. I'm sick of OCs that are essentially just Mary Sues and despite your claims otherwise, it's reading like a very belabored Mary Sue to be. I find it requires skill to actually work with the existing cast of characters rather than trying to artificially graft on a poorly made up OC. Especially when it's a bandaid revisionist method. There's too many obstacles towards an OC what with the immediate thought of Mary Sue-ism and what not. I recommend that you actually try to explore the psyches of the existing DBZ characters if you want to write fiction that explores the DBZ universe. Or just save your OCs for an universe of your own making.
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