Title: Unforgiveable Review Reviewed By: Wacky [MediaMiner Member] On: June 13, 2012 21:34 EDT Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10 Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10 Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10 Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10 Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review: Very good start to a series, even if it was Rated X. The only two bits of criticism I'd give would be to change the hiccups from "hic" in the middle of a sentence to "" to show an interruption. Second, for your larger paragraphs, try breaking them up. Most writers don't realize that when people see a huge block of text it can be deterring to read all of it and they move off. Just start a new paragraph even if all you're doing is hitting the return key a couple of times in the middle of the paragraph. No body will notice the difference. Great start and I can't wait to see what happens next! |