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| "Awakening" Reviews/Comments [ 5 ] | Reviewed By: Raye-Rei [MediaMiner Member] On: December 15, 2002 17:36 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Me likey!! 'Tis berry berry ineresting and I like it lots! I'll be waiting for an update. Oh! There were a few spelling errors. Other than that it was extraordinary.
Raye-Rei | Reviewed By: maybop On: November 20, 2002 18:58 CST
Comment/Review:
Great fic. I can't wait till you continue! | Reviewed By: Xaira [MediaMiner Member] On: October 17, 2002 00:39 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Wow.. Youji, I'm guessing this is your "new" style of writing you once talked to us about in SoH!! This is so very good ^-^ And.. I love the bonus addition! You know... with Folken.. That's awesome... Hehe. I gave u a "nine" just to bug ya... OF course it deserves a "ten"!!! I didn't mind your past work on this, but now I just can't say no to your present work ^^ The emotional dept is probably what I love most about it... Especially with Folken in it now... It seems that his spirit also serves a symbolic purpose now... Keep writing... I love this new version....
--out. | Reviewed By: Fierysable On: October 16, 2002 19:13 CDT
Comment/Review:
WAH! It's gotten SO MUCH BETTER!! *starry eyed* I LOVE Folkein making an appearance!! Especially about him being the brother in death that he never was...It's GOOD. I had a little trouble with the beginning though; the intro; felt like you kinda rushed through the descriptions of how everyone was...and *CougH* something tells me ur using a personal bias against Millerna in ur fic to make how Allen reacts against her. *grinz* Not that I wouldn't have done the same...hee hee...=^^= love where this is going !!!
*Dons "Muse's devil outfit" Points to the computer* WRITE! ;) | Reviewed By: Fierysable On: October 16, 2002 19:01 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
*mwah*
This is a LOT better than the first draft, although...*eyebrow raises* KUDO YOJI EH?? *cough cough* LOL! Ok, back to the review. It has more humanity in it, things aren't just going boom boom boom, happening in a sequence without going into emotional depth; I love the way u contrast Hitomi's unhappiness with the joy and bounce that's going on around her, the nightclub was a nice touch. (Dude, as soon as u said "dirty blonde hair, tall, and sunglasses" I was like, SHE DIDN'T! LOL!!) If u want, and this is just personal preference, not really something wrong with the story, you could kinda do a little more description factor, maybe? But u noe, that's just me. Description is my LIFE.
=P
N'wayz, getting good, luva gal! *HUGZ* I want my chapters!! hee hee...going to read ur third chapter now and find out what's going on currently in ur first draft....*head spins* bai babe! |
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