| "Conflicted" Reviews/Comments [ 35 ] |
| Pages (3): [ « < 1 2 3 > » ] |
Reviewed By: Nelly On: April 04, 2003 18:37 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
This was good!! There aren't many Yami/ Yugi rapes...please update! |
Reviewed By: Dryad Chick [MediaMiner Member] On: April 04, 2003 16:09 CST
Comment/Review:
Wow. That was intense O.o *sucking whip cream form the can* sooo, it's all very interesting and naughty, yes? ^.^ oh ho ho.
Anywho, it seems pretty good so far, just some friendly suggestions:
When you have dialogue, you should space it out. It makes the story flow better, allows dramatic scenes to be more dramatic, and is easier to read. ^-^ All ya have to do is hit enter, then tab, when you have a new piece of dialogue.
Also, the ~*~ things broke up the story. Since you are writing in third person, these separations aren't really neccesary, because you aren't looking straight through a certain character's eyes. Just take those out, and it will make a smoother read.
There were a few spelling errors, such as realising is realizing. There weren't too many, though ^.^;; I've seen some stories...oh god...do people just sleep through school? I mean, gawd! *sleeps during school too, just trying to look good ^.^;;*
YAY! Write more! *swirly thumb* ;_; but poor Yuugi-chan! Although Yami IS pretty evil...I mean...in the manga...he's frickin evil...heheheheheheheeheheh once again write or post or whatever more soon!
|DCHK| |
Reviewed By: Dragondreamer Yami Dragon [MediaMiner Member] On: April 04, 2003 07:03 CST
Comment/Review:
DON'T LEAVE IT THERE!! EEPPP!!! UPDATE!! UPDATE!! |
Reviewed By: I love Yugi and Davis [MediaMiner Member] On: March 07, 2003 14:43 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Good story but.... I WANT MORE!!! I want 2 find out wat Yami does. Will Yugi ever 4give him? And there r Yami/Yugi rape one. I no cuz I've read em but urs is by far the best so far |
Reviewed By: My Own Shukuun [MediaMiner Member] On: February 23, 2003 18:13 CST
Comment/Review:
Great story but... Where's the rest?This story is screaming to be finished! Hear it?
Story: FINISH ME!! FINISH ME!!!
see? please fulfill this poor deprived story it's only wish!! |
Reviewed By: Animechick On: February 12, 2003 19:50 CST
Comment/Review:
Please update!!! I have been waiting half a year for u to update this story!!!! I'll give u pocky if u do!!!!!!!![choclate covered biscit stick] |
Reviewed By: AngelEyes On: January 26, 2003 19:16 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
10.10.10.10. I GIVEYOU THE TOP RATINGS NOW WHERE IS THE REST??? PLEASE!!! :grovels on knees: PLEASE UPDATE SOON!!!!!! YOU ARE TORTURING ME!!! |
Reviewed By: Evil Inga and Evil Yami Inga On: January 15, 2003 17:29 CST
Comment/Review:
Evil Inga: ACK!!! THAT IS IT?!?!?!?! *looks at Evil Yami Inga* ACK!!! WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU!?!?!
Evil Yami Inga: ~_~ ... what does it look like!?! I"VE BEEN TURNED INTO A MAN!!
Evil Inga: *grins* i'll have to thank my sister the bunny magician for that!! o.o .. oh my.. look at our review... |
Reviewed By: Child of Darkness [MediaMiner Member] On: December 19, 2002 21:16 CST
Comment/Review:
Ello! |
Reviewed By: TheOtherChair On: December 19, 2002 20:09 CST
Comment/Review:
Grrr...This is good, so finish it! Just finish the stupid thing!*thrusts pencil into Child of Darkness's hand* C'mon! Fishish it! I wanna see some angst here, too! Don't listen to those people who don't want this sad! I've seen plenty of nice, cute happy Yami/Yugi stories, but I want something different!!!
**sane side takes over**
So please finish it? |
Reviewed By: firedryad [MediaMiner Member] On: December 30, 2002 16:07 CST
Rating(s):Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Comment/Review:
wheres the rest? update soon!!! |
Reviewed By: CasualOtaku [MediaMiner Member] On: November 30, 2002 02:06 CST
Comment/Review:
Hmm, I'm curious yet afraid all at once. It would be so easy for it to go badly, but then again, it could turn out quite right.
Oooh, what the hell! I'll bite, the first part was good, so where's part two?
As long as Yugi gets to enjoy it at least a little. I'd hate for him to be totally broken. |
Reviewed By: Kari On: November 28, 2002 18:51 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
It's very good but where is the rest. THAT'S why you got a 9 where it could have been a ten. Where is the rest? You MUST finish this. |
Reviewed By: *cries* On: November 26, 2002 12:24 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Nooo!! Don't have Yami rape his aibou! I love this couple! Angst is not at all bad. Infact, I enjoy angst. But, please, please, please!! *gets down on her knees* Let Yami think about what he's doing and make the next chapter happier! Or, as a suggestion, Yami could be ATTEMPTING to rape Yugi and then suddenly realizes what he's doing. Yes? No? Maybe? Simply suggesting ^_^
Oh, and I LOVE the detail you put into this! It's beautiful! Keep writing! ^_~
*hopes you write next chapter soon and make it happy* |
Reviewed By: AMG On: November 12, 2002 00:05 CST
Comment/Review:
Niffty coolness! Really cool! Please have more! ^_^ Yami and Yuugi rule! =) Kawaiiness! Lemony Goodness next, ne? Please?! ^_~ I wish you didn't have to make it rape though...that's mean. Yami isn't THAT mean. ^_^
Y+Y4EVER AND EVER! |
| Pages (3): [ « < 1 2 3 > » ] |
