| "True Love Conquers All" Reviews/Comments [ 38 ] |
| Pages (3): [ « < 1 2 3 ] |
Reviewed By: The Oujis Mate [MediaMiner Member] On: July 14, 2003 23:14 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
Hey, this is very interesting so far. Bulma's a little ooc, but i'll give you poetic license. Hurry with the next chapter. Oh, and i bet it's yamcha, that'd be weird. |
Reviewed By: Laina On: July 11, 2003 16:03 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
You have to update. PLEASE DO IT REALLY SOON PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 |
Reviewed By: roxychica091 On: July 06, 2003 07:23 CDT
Rating(s):Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
kick ass story... update soon |
Reviewed By: Sakura no Hime On: July 06, 2003 00:32 CDT
Comment/Review:
I loved it. Please write more! |
Reviewed By: Lone Vixen On: June 26, 2003 19:12 CDT
Comment/Review:
Oh my, was that unbearably short. *scratches the back of her head*
To start off: Hello, I'm Lone Vixen.
I'm glad to see that chapter one is still a work in progress. There wasn't enough to even judge if i wanted to read on. However, it seems that you'd have a good B/V going on from what you have so far.
Poor Bulma, Yamcha never deserved her because of the lowly fact that he's a slimey rat. As we all know though, she wises up for the mighty Prince of all Sayajins. - Thank God! lol.
I believe there was only one thing about your writing that i feel the need to comment on. That is your sentence structure. It is very blunt and to the point which therefore means, it lacks detail. Perhaps that is why it's length was rather short. This is just something to think about.
I wish you mega luck on your future work with, True Love Conquers All. I'm always peeking in on MediaMiner to check for updates so i'll be looking for yours now.
Take Care!
-Lone Vixen |
Reviewed By: trunksvegetafrodo [MediaMiner Member] On: June 26, 2003 15:45 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!! |
Reviewed By: Lone Vixen [MediaMiner Member] On: June 29, 2003 08:19 CDT
Comment/Review:
I love what you got going on here!
I like how the plot is picking up pace now. Ya know what i think? I think Bulma should be secretly plotting a way to get back at Yamcha. Part of the plan could be that she took him back, because she looks mega gullable to Yamcha if she willingly took him back after what happened. She should've been stronger and realised she had her very own hunk of a Saiyajin right at home! lol It's just an idea i had because Yamcha deserves a good kick in the ass. lol
Anyways, i suggest a few things. One, could you seperate the lines in your story please? like paragraphs from paragraphs and dialogues from dialogues. It'd just make it easier on the eyes.
Two, i suggest you read over your story a few more times so as to just correct some of the spelling errors. Sometimes, one mispelled word can through off the whole meaning of the sentence. Ya know?
Three, my last suggestion is, make Bulma toughen up! I hate seeing her just taking Vegeta's crap. But they are so cute together, like when they kept thinking of each other. lol
Anyways, good luck with your further chapters! I hope to see more updates soon.
-Lone Vixen |
Reviewed By: GMP Wolf On: July 28, 2003 17:48 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
This is a story that I cried a couple of times. The poor woman...
I beg u update please
I want to know what happens. |
| Pages (3): [ « < 1 2 3 ] |
