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| "We're In This Together" Reviews/Comments [ 5 ] | Reviewed By: SonKikyo [MediaMiner Member] On: July 29, 2003 17:20 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
*points to title* that's alls I gots ta say. Though, me thinks you should've done TrunksxVegeta too. Oh well, still really good. | Reviewed By: androidqueen On: May 10, 2003 21:11 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
i am a large fan of yaow, and I thought this was great, the emotions could have been a little higher, but it was an all over very good job | Reviewed By: little_ninjin [MediaMiner Member] On: April 22, 2003 05:31 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Raven, it reminded me a bit of "Chains of Affection," the way they found comfort in each other through grief. Very beautiful. I love the clean first person narration. You have a great turn of phrase. Plus the erotic scenees were very well done. Honestly i started the fic getting myself ready for something icky, sinc eit was incest. And came out of it floored by the class of the piece. Very beautifully done. :D
It was so sad. I felt terrible when goten found out trunks wsa dead. You carry the drama out so well with your writing:
" My head, my heart, my gut all clenched up to the point that I found myself huddled on the ice in the fetal position, my body being violently wracked with my cries. My beautiful prince, my Trunks, was gone."
I am jealous! It's poetic AND first person. Beautiful!
I wanted to makea special mention of the incest. The plausability for consensual incest seems very limited. Somehow you made it seem almost reasonable. That's got to be tough. You did a great job there. | Reviewed By: Jady [MediaMiner Member] On: April 22, 2003 02:19 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Heh... *nods in agreement with Mana, but wants the next part from Jita and Trunks' side!!!!!!*
DBZ Incest Queen? *blushes* Another title to add... heh... *glomp* Ya already know I loved it! | Reviewed By: manawolf [MediaMiner Member] On: April 21, 2003 23:43 CDT
Comment/Review:
Totally original, very ingenious. I would have liked to have gotten a better sense of Goku's personality, what he was going through & feeling... he was kind of nebulous, to me. But it did work! Loved the commentary about seme/uke... very nice.
It was a good stopping point as far as the story arc goes... but.... I can't help it I want a lemony epilogue! XD |
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