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| "Sephiroth's Story" Reviews/Comments [ 3 ] | Title: oh dear.
Reviewed By: Lady Xenobia [MediaMiner Member] On: March 14, 2004 10:20 CST
Comment/Review:
*wipes the blood from her eyes and blinks* I don't think it could have been more painful to read if you held me down and gave me a thousand papercuts to the eyeballs. I must be honest. You've completely bastardized a brilliant character in a way that I've never seen matched. Your format is torture...I've had problems with word documents loading onto Media Miner correctly myself, but GAWDS, what did you DO? Unless you wrote this purely as a joke, please clean it up and use some critical thinking to revise it. Hetero stories are fine, but this story is a major example of why I avoid male/female fanfics like the plague. Too many fangirls out there trying to put themselves with the bishounen. And if it IS a mary sue, it's no wonder you're fantasizing about yourself with imaginary characters. Any real man would run from women who act like these pathetic "original" girls. Sorry to rant, but I'm still in shock from trying to read this.
| Title: Proofreading is a good thing
Reviewed By: Elf From Space On: September 29, 2003 00:51 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 2 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 1 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 4 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 1 of 10
Overall Rating: 1 of 10 Comment/Review:
PLEASE just take a look at your story and notice that it's half messed up attempts at html that are what you get when you let microsoft word attempt html. just turn it into a .txt file or something, it'll work MUCH better
| Reviewed By: Xeledra On: July 27, 2003 23:37 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 1 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 1 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 1 of 10
Overall Rating: 1 of 10 Comment/Review:
The format for the fic is messed up. You might be using characters the browser cannot handle. As for the fic itself, I don't think you're mature enough to even be contemplating a lemon. Sephiroth is badly out of character, your original female is clearly a Mary Sue and overall, this is one pathetic piece of drivel.
Take a good writing class, learn a few things about relationships and sex and THEN come back and try to write a lemon if you are so determined to. |
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