| "Hidden Love Revealed" Reviews/Comments [ 40 ] |
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Reviewed By: Alli Hearts On: October 06, 2003 04:45 CDT
Rating(s):Spelling & Grammar: 6 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
for the couples thing i vote ryou/bakura. NOOOOOOOO!!!! don't discontinue it. welll if you do the you'll have time to update "change of heart." i like this story, but you should make the chapters more longer.----Alli Hearts
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Title: Chappie 5
Reviewed By: Bakuraluva [MediaMiner Member] On: October 05, 2003 21:04 CDT
Comment/Review:
Well, I reviewed up on ff.net, and I repeat, very Kawaii stuff goin' on! If you didn't get my other review, I vote Marik/Bakura (you surprised me with that one) I don't think that you should put the story on hiatus, but you should do whatever you think is best!
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Reviewed By: Deme [MediaMiner Member] On: October 04, 2003 21:09 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 7 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
It's a real good story line, and continue REAL SOON! BUT... you have some serious grammatical errors, and it's too short also. Otherwise, I like it. Improve and continue please, because I wanna read, lol.
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Reviewed By: GreenFairy On: September 30, 2003 20:26 CDT
Comment/Review:
Chapter four is much longer. An improvement indeed! heh, I like the Malik X Yami no Malik scenes.
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Reviewed By: MistyStarlight On: September 23, 2003 19:40 CDT
Comment/Review:
I love your idea but I do wish you wouldn't change PoV so much. Please keep writing if school is hard (I know your pain).
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Reviewed By: Joey'z Sk8tergurl On: September 23, 2003 09:37 CDT
Comment/Review:
Hey, great story! Seto/Jou pairing should be next, but then again, that's my opinion! :)
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Reviewed By: zinx On: September 19, 2003 22:04 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
yo can you pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeas keep on writing this story is a real clif hanger . I would sure love to read on. |
Reviewed By: GreenFairy On: September 13, 2003 06:40 CDT
Comment/Review:
The length could REALLY use some work. I suggest that you write at least over 1000 words per chapter, because writing 500 words for one chapter is an insult. I can write reviews longer than that.
But, other then that, I love the order of the pairings. I would've liked the pairings better if it was BakuraxMalik, but they are brothers. ~_~ Still, the pairings are good. |
Reviewed By: JoeysGal [MediaMiner Member] On: September 12, 2003 19:56 CDT
Comment/Review:
Hey this is good please keep going, but your spelling and grammar could do with a serious polish up! For example, putting what different characters are saying on the same line is a no no. Put them in speech marks on seperate lines so it's clearer, and perhaps put what they're thinking in Italics or something... kawaii nontheless!! |
Reviewed By: Freedom On: September 07, 2003 09:37 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
I really like the fact that it's RyouxYami no Bakura and THEN MalikxYami no Malik because I always see YuugixYami no Yuugi after that. I don't like Yami no YuugixYuugi ^^'
Well, you could have been a bit more descriptive, but I'm really impressed with the originality. Keep up the good work.
(p.s: make sure to put lots of Malikxyami no Malik...)
(p.p.s: It could have been even more interesting if it was Yami no Bakura x Yami no Malik since they are enemies. But that's alright!) |
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