|
| "Black Storms" Reviews/Comments [ 4 ] | Title: cool story
Reviewed By: headgirl On: September 16, 2005 14:29 CDT
Comment/Review:
ok, ya writing is good,and id like to know whats going on, so continue pls!
| Title: Great
Reviewed By: ptbear [MediaMiner Member] On: March 05, 2004 20:36 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Good story. Update soon. Would like to know what happens next.
| Reviewed By: eaglehawk On: December 30, 2003 02:58 CST
Comment/Review:
not too bad. however the one thing that really annoyed me was that the words seem to go on and on and on. there are things called commas and it seems like you really don't like to use them especially when someone's saying something and it makes it hard to follow. sorry for being so nit-picky but being a writer myself I pay the most attention to how the sentences flow and how easily they seem to work. commas would really help you there and I know they can be annoying but they're really helpful all my writer friends agree. (sorry for being a tad sarcastic, it's just the way I am.)
| Title: just some (well meaning) suggestions....
Reviewed By: caliko (not signed in) On: September 30, 2003 07:26 CDT
Comment/Review:
Ok, I don't mean this to be mean. However, you are shortchanging the story. You need to be more descriptive of the surroundings. Also, when you write dialouge, say it out loud. Does it sound like something people would really say, or does it sound forced? Don't give up, tho, cause we all started out writing like you. It takes a lot of WORK to get these things out. But, in the end, it's worth it. Not only does your writing improve (and it shows in school), but you have something to be proud about later. Good luck! ~Caliko
|
|
|
