| "This is my story" Reviews/Comments [ 7 ] |
Reviewed By: BIG_DADDY [MediaMiner Member] On: April 17, 2004 22:46 CDT
Comment/Review:
Never mind I know what Goku's Solar Flare does. It blinds people temporarily, right?
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Title: hey hey hey!
Reviewed By: Cillaty [MediaMiner Member] On: April 07, 2004 22:16 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
A man it's me. Since you checked out my fic i thought the least i could do was check out your story. It's awsome! and big daddy gets on my nerves. overall, good fic.
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Reviewed By: BIG_DADDY [MediaMiner Member] On: April 06, 2004 00:54 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 7 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Oh well, looks like my last review won't do any good now. But hey, you could make a sequel! But I have one question, what does Goku's Solar Flare do?
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Title: Getting Better.
Reviewed By: BIG_DADDY [MediaMiner Member] On: April 05, 2004 17:51 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 7 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Getting better. But take my advice and get your grammar checked out. That's a big no-no in your fic because it is too difficult to tell where a sentence ends. That's the only downfall or else this would be one of my top 10's. Anyway my guys has one new attack. Death Destruction: He only uses this as a last resort. He rips off a piece of his body and hurls it into space. Then he destroys himself along with the planet but doesn't die. Then he regenerates himself from that small piece of skin and comes back just as powerful as before. And he is even more lethal, as he can breathe in space. And... um... he got regenration from when he visited the area where the Cell Games were. It appears that a piece of Cell's skin (he regenrates himself if only if his head hasn't been destroyed) survived the blast from Gohan and fused it with his body making him pretty much indestructible if they don't destroy his head (which is already difficult enough as it is)
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Reviewed By: BIG_DADDY [MediaMiner Member] On: April 03, 2004 18:28 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
Getting better, although it wouldn't hurt to know where you put commas, aposterphes, etc.
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Title: An improvement.
Reviewed By: BIG_DADDY [MediaMiner Member] On: April 02, 2004 23:20 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 7 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 7 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
This fic is starting to improve slightly. Actually, I'm usually too lazy to go and re-read the other chapters but I'm sure you've improved them. Keep up the (semi) good work.
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Title: Huh?! What's going on here?!
Reviewed By: BIG_DADDY [MediaMiner Member] On: March 30, 2004 00:10 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 6 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 3 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 5 of 10
Overall Rating: 7 of 10 Comment/Review:
Umm... the plot was too undeveloped, your grammar needs to improve a bit, the plot could have been better and there wasn't much fighting either. Although your fic's originallity rating was great, this fic could have been so much more than it already is. Try thinking of a plot before you decide to write another Dragon Ball Z fic. Or edit the chpaters so that it explains how you all got to earth and you meeting the others. Sorry if this review seems too harsh (even after I gave you some ideas) but I'm only saying the truth. Good luck trying to improve on the plot. And try to think ahead of time before you actually post it up.
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