Title: Interesting, but a little difficult to read
Reviewed By: CuriousLittleBird [MediaMiner Member] On: August 26, 2004 16:29 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 6 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
The story's plot sounds interesting, but I found it very difficult to wade through the alternating Japanese and English words. The beauty of the storyline was lost underneath the syntax and the changing languages. (This is not a flame by any means---I just want people to read this story and be able to understand it easily, because it deserves to be understood.) It is admirable that you're staying with the original Japanese version as much as you can (and it's something I could well emulate). Consider posting a completely translated version of the chapter you put up, and see if that is more or less difficult for you. It is up to you as to how you write the story, but that might help people understand it a little better. I look forward to your next update---please do continue with this story! ---CuriousLittleBird
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