| "Shikon no Tama now Dragon Balls?" Reviews/Comments [ 8 ] |
Title: Saphieralynn
Reviewed By: Saphieralynn [MediaMiner Member] On: March 05, 2007 13:44 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 4 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 4 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 5 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 5 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
I hope you up date soon and the daghters name is Marin so you now...please up date soon...Ja
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Reviewed By: Purefire16 [MediaMiner Member] On: November 03, 2006 22:31 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
PLZ CONTINUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Title: my mermiad haten' chicken says hi... bye... AGAIN
Reviewed By: gcdv [MediaMiner Member] On: August 07, 2005 00:21 CDT
Comment/Review:
SRY, FORGOT TO WRIGHT THIS IN MY LAST REVIEW, UMM, I THIN THAT YOU SHOULD HAVE KRILLIN LIVE AT HIS OWN HOUSE. AND ANDROID 18 IS NOW JUST CALLED 18. AND ONE MORE THING, WHEN YOU ARE WRIGHTING THE SCRPIT FORMAT, YOU SHOULD NOT PUT THE ACTIONS AND SPEECH TOGETHER WITHOUT ANY TYPE OF SEPARATION... EX: Rin: Kagome saved me! pointing to Kagome... YOU SHOULD PUT SOMETHING LIKE THIS SO THAT IT DEOSN'T CONFUSE PEOPLE... Rin: Kagome saved me!(HERE YOU SHOULD HIT ENTER AND GOT ANOTHER LINE) SHE SAID pointing to Kagome... I JUST THOUGHT I TELL YOU WHAT I THOUGHT, BUT IT DIDN'T CONFUSE ME, BUT SOMETIMES THE WAY U WRIGHT CAN CAUSE LOSE OF READERS, SRY IF U THINK THIS IS A FLAME, BUT ITS NOT. I REALLY DO LOVE YOUR STORY... BYE... 4 REALL THIS TIME
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Title: my mermiad haten' chicken says hi... bye
Reviewed By: gcdv [MediaMiner Member] On: August 07, 2005 00:15 CDT
Comment/Review:
i THINK I READ A VERSION OF THIS ON FF, OR SOMETHING SIMSILAR... OH WELL, I CAN'T REMEBER THE PEN NAME SO IF IT ISN'T U THEN, KRILLINS DAUGHTERS NAME IS MARRON AND SESSHOMARUS AND INUYASHA R BOTH BROTHERS (1/2) THEY SHARE A FATHER BUT NOT A MOTHER, INUYASHAS MOTHER WAS HUMAN AND SESSYS WAS NOT... i LOVE IT, PLEASE LET IT BE A GOTEN/KAGOME PAIRING, FOR SOME REASON I DON'T LIKE WITH TRUNKS... BYE... LOL
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Reviewed By: inu yashas witch [MediaMiner Member] On: April 07, 2005 14:30 CDT
Comment/Review:
update story is very good
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Reviewed By: rose of vegeta On: October 08, 2004 15:09 CDT
Comment/Review:
Ok. Krillin lives at Kame house with Roshi and family. His daughter's name is Marron. As far as the story itself, you have an interesting idea to do a crossover (and I have found some really good ones) but your writing style is too simple. You need to elaborate more on the area, the people, the situations. Personally the script style of making people speak is annoying in my opinion. I'm not trying to flame...I'm giving criticisms that you can work with and improve your writing.
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Reviewed By: Winged Fox On: October 08, 2004 10:46 CDT
Comment/Review:
Krillin's daughter's name is marile and Krillin calls andrid 18 just 18.
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Reviewed By: bee3 On: October 06, 2004 00:36 CDT
Comment/Review:
i like it. sounds great. can't wait to find out what happens next. please update soon.
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