Reviewed By: Rose of Sharon [MediaMiner Member] On: January 20, 2007 16:22 CST
Comment/Review:
Chapter 4: Wow, you've got a really nice story line going there. There are just a few small things that I don't like. The first is really small - you keep making spelling errors. Secondly, I just feel as if you are moving too fast. Kagome seems as if she's falling in love too quickly. I can't blame Inuyasha, because you make it seem as if he has been watching her for quite a bit of time. But, still, the best thing for them would probably be time and experience. It's as if they are falling in love over a matter of days! I don't think its possible to build such a strong relationship without time. They can't already be on the kissing stage! Unless, of course, Kagome's just sad and needs someone. And Inuyasha's still smarting over Kikyou. In which case, I don't think they will ever have a decent relationship. But, honestly, I love your story. Next time, seperate the song lyrics from the rest of the story with little symbols. (For example, ~*~). Anyway, this must be the absolute longest review I've ever written.
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