| "Mandate Of Hell" Reviews/Comments [ 11 ] |
Title: A great loss of opportunity
Reviewed By: Street Shark [MediaMiner Member] On: April 09, 2016 09:01 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 7 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 7 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 2 of 10
Overall Rating: 3 of 10 Comment/Review:
I'm sorry to tell you, but you've wasted an enormous opportunity to
make a good lemon ff. The idea of a Shinji's injury was good, but
it was too gruesome and cruel. And, worst even, you've not used the
injury to make an harem story with Misato, Rei, Asuka and even
Hikari as erotic nurse. Beside the new useless characters are
merely a worst clone version of Asuka and Toji, cause she's an
arrogant bi**ch that hate the commons and he's a thug with a golden
hearth. Such a pity cause I can feel your effort to write the
story, but this one isnt' going anywhere and that had ruined
everything...
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Reviewed By: KillerRabbit [MediaMiner Member] On: October 01, 2010 08:51 PDT
Comment/Review:
only comment for now is that obviously someone has the exchange rate wrong because a thousand yen is about ten american dollar. three thousand yen is thirty dollars, so they're working for 10 dollars a week. what is this the 1920's?
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Reviewed By: clilc [MediaMiner Member] On: May 01, 2007 09:20 PDT
Comment/Review:
Great! It's not dead! Please continue!! At least until when Kensuke gets some from Gwen, He hardly ever gets any lol.
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Title: Its been awhile
Reviewed By: dennisud [MediaMiner Member] On: July 15, 2006 16:35 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
I've been waiting for this as you haven't had Shinji and Asuka talk, aaaaand the fact that with him slwwping in Rei's apartment, when would he 'be' sleeping so update this one please! dennisud
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Title: ACC's not realistic
Reviewed By: dennisud [MediaMiner Member] On: July 13, 2006 17:11 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 6 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 5 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 7 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 7 of 10
Overall Rating: 7 of 10 Comment/Review:
I havev to stop here. The ACC's and Shinji simply aren't that plausible or realistic to me. And thats not even accounting for Rei's and Asuka's OCC behavior. Overall your giving your ACC's almost half of each chapter and that's not good. dennisud
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Reviewed By: camintmier [MediaMiner Member] On: January 01, 2006 05:57 PST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Wow, you've definatly got one heck of a plot going. I have a feeling that Kensuke's little project will probably be perverted by Gendo somehow. The whole Shinji/Asuka role reversal thing threw me for a bit of a loop, but I could totally see Shinji finally having his fill of Asuka's antics. Also, I noticed that you refered to Shinji as the first child in this chapter. To my knowledge, in the series he's the third child, with Rei being the 1st, and Asuka being the 2nd. Oh well, no worries. Great story and I hope you continue it. Surpried that not many people have reviewed this story, as it's very good. May you have a happy new year, and tons of fanfic ideas flow into your head.
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Reviewed By: ClownyMelonBalls [MediaMiner Member] On: April 26, 2005 15:11 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 6 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
This fan fic is awesome. I can't wait to read the upcoming chapters. Please keep it going. The story lines and plots are very well thought out. Good job on a great story.
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Title: WHOA
Reviewed By: ShugoAyanami [MediaMiner Member] On: April 22, 2005 06:29 PDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 7 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
HOLY CRAP. This is amazing. Blew my mind. Continue post-haste. I want to see how Kensuke deals with Gwen. Even if she is an up-tight b!tch. And Frost is awesome. The name suits, for he is a conumdrum. Fire in his belly, ice on his soul
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Reviewed By: Dcwestby [MediaMiner Member] On: March 10, 2005 20:26 PST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Wow... Thats quite a curve ball you throw in about Hikari... Considering you never made clear exactly who all was dragged into the fight. Now Shinji should undo what he planned for Asuka, not to mention rethink his stance toward Asuka and Rei... That little sidenote about Shinji still not functioning fully tells us readers that Shinji will need more help and healing as the story goes on... I wonder if Shinji will get back to cooking soon. Somehow tho I doubt he'll revert pre nut crunched Shinji as far as attitude and demeanor for a while anyway. I'm still debating now after reading the last few chapters on whether or not Rei and Asuka should be punished by Shinji for starting the shindig that led to him being screwed up firstly. But I trust you have some interesting plotlines that will reveal all when time comes. Great update!
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Title: Decent
Reviewed By: Death-By-Minnow [MediaMiner Member] On: February 25, 2005 23:16 PST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 5 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 7 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 8 of 10
Overall Rating: 7 of 10 Comment/Review:
I just started reading. It's good, but spelling and grammar errors are everywhere. You may want to clean this up a bit. I'll read more tomorrow, but I'm just too damn tired right now.
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Title: Good job
Reviewed By: Dcwestby [MediaMiner Member] On: January 10, 2005 16:45 PST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 7 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 7 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 7 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Quite enjoyable... Wish the fighting in chapter one or two was a little more detail as to exactly who nearly de-manned Shinji, but I suppose its best we not think of that. On the other end.. quite a nice gesture of generosity by Gendo in that house there. Also, is Shinji going back to school/home next chapter? Also, I sensed a bit of plot foreshadowing in the way the rooms were chosen.. Shinji is gonna be in the midst once again... poor guy... Very good, hope you up date soon
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