| "Love Goes On" Reviews/Comments [ 6 ] |
Title: FFARG Review (The missing half!)
Reviewed By: MissMusicality [MediaMiner Member] On: June 15, 2005 02:20 CDT
Comment/Review:
Thank you SO much for submitting your fic to be reviewed! I read through both of the chapters, since it was interesting, and you didn't specify which chapter you wanted reviewed. To start off, great job! I only noticed a few minor punctuation problems. (And then... it continued on into the review. Sorry about the posting mistake!)
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Title: FFARG Review
Reviewed By: MissMusicality [MediaMiner Member] On: June 15, 2005 00:10 CDT
Comment/Review:
"'Kagome, hurry up! I use the bathroom too you know!' Yanna banged nosily at the door. Kagome shut the water off and wrapped herself in a towel. 'It's all yours Yanna.' ''Bout damn time. You asleep in there or something Kagome?'" In these few sentences, "nosily" should be "noisily" and there should be a comma when addressing Yanna: "It's all yours, Yanna" and a comma when addressing Kagome "You asleep in there or something, Kagome?" A good beta should be able to help you solve these minor problems. Every good writer needs an editor. If you have one, both of you need to take another look, so you can make the story even better by fixing the tiny problems. Now that the little stuff is done, I must congratulate you on a beautiful little tale. I have to admit, I am sad that it isn't longer. And you left with a valid point at the end. Well done, and nicely thought out. Thanks for the great read!!
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Reviewed By: RadiosNmyHead [MediaMiner Member] On: May 07, 2005 23:30 CDT
Comment/Review:
Just a warning, if you don't want this to get deleted, you better put a hentai label on it.
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Title: Part One
Reviewed By: RadiosNmyHead [MediaMiner Member] On: May 07, 2005 23:06 CDT
Comment/Review:
This is very well written, and I love the melancholy. I also like the way you disperse the memories in the chapter. There are a couple minor spelling and grammar mistakes that you might want to check over, but besides that, it's really good!
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Reviewed By: Shinobi-chan [MediaMiner Member] On: January 25, 2005 01:20 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Great story Idea! I really hope you continue this because so far, you have a great start on it. Please continue and I'll continue reading ^___^
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Title: omg
Reviewed By: anime fan [MediaMiner Member] On: January 24, 2005 23:35 CST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
really good fic!! this is an awesome idea. and it does make sense. i haven't seen the end of the series yet, but i always thought that something like that (neither being happy in the others time) would happen. but the whole past-life idea is awesome!!! update soon!! *shakes fist*...dont make me get angry if you dont =^~.-^=
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