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"Looking into Terror's Eyes" Reviews/Comments [ 21 ]
Pages (2): [ «  <  1  2 ]
 Reviewed By: Golden Shadow (melancholy_shadow@hotmail.com)  On: November 05, 2001 19:11 CST
Comment/Review:
Hmmm. Well, your ideas are neat, but maybe the story would have a better effect if you tried to be more fluid. Try to take us into the characters thoughts. Slow the pacing down and try to give us an inner sense of what the characters are feeling... ^^ Overall, pretty good.
G.S.- over and out! Peace! ^^
 Reviewed By: Golden Shadow  On: November 06, 2001 15:44 CST
Comment/Review:
A little smoother writing. The transitions are still a bit choppy, though. Keep it up. I see some better points throughout this! ^^ Maybe you could add some more descriptions to the characters and their surroundings.
G.S.-Over and out! *Peace! ^^
 Reviewed By: Golden Shadow (melancholy_shadow@hotmail.com)  On: November 09, 2001 22:02 CST
Comment/Review:
That chapter had some really great dialogue with it... "The real joke is..." and "I' wonder what Vegeta would say if we had a romantic dinner?" meanwhile: "Gyanrrinkanho!" (or however you spell it.. i'm too lazy to go look right now...) It made me laugh! I like their contrasting dreams...
 Reviewed By: Golden Shadow  On: November 10, 2001 15:40 CST
Comment/Review:
Well, I must say I liked last chapter better, but, oh,well! This is a confusing b/v relationship! From hate to love! Zero to sixty! ^^
A few grammatical errors were in this one, but keep on! If you keep writing, it always gets better... eventually, I think! ^^
G.S.-over and out! Peace! ^^
 Reviewed By: kali  On: November 10, 2001 18:02 CST
Comment/Review:
good fic.
 Reviewed By: majinsk8rvegeta  On: November 11, 2001 22:58 CST
Comment/Review:
chapter 6 is due to be redone! and chap 7 should be coming after that!
 Reviewed By: Re-o-ko  On: November 12, 2001 19:34 CST
Comment/Review:
VERY GOOD! one of the best v/b fanfics ever ^_^!!
 Reviewed By: majinsk8rvegeta  On: November 16, 2001 21:33 CST
Comment/Review:
sorry if this chap didn't come so early this week!!! i still need to know if u guys want to read a mafia style b/v fic!!! so write a review if ya guys want to read this kind of style fic thing!! i reall y need to know!!!
 Reviewed By: flamer to the first flamer  On: November 16, 2001 21:39 CST
Comment/Review:
u suck!!!! Bad to worse is a good fic, but we don't need a fuckin fic rivalry between two b/v fics!!! so shut the fuck up flamer ass!!! have u ever written a true b/v fic thats actually good?
ur such a jackass!!! all the other b/v fics are good to read for inspiration so other authors could write another b/v fic. That's how it goes. so who ever the hell u are i want to see a better b/v fic thanthis one an from bad to worse!! man, ur like dissing all b/v fic authors out there!!! sunnavabitch!! go ahead write ur own b/v fic story and see how hard it is to write and think some more ideas to make the fic better. jes another fic rivalry!!
 Reviewed By: b/v fan!!  On: November 16, 2001 21:43 CST
Comment/Review:
yeah!! this is the best fic ever of the b/v on how they got together of the 'ness!!! I hope all the othe r people here will like this fic!! read from bad to worse too! what the hell read all the b/v fics!! i think the mafia style b/v fic sound s cool!!!!!!!
 Reviewed By: Golden Shadow (melancholy_shadow@hotmail.com)  On: November 16, 2001 22:20 CST
Comment/Review:
Getting good... Oh, and flamers suck don't they? I so want to kick that "flamer" to Hell! But that's just my protective side over authors... write on. we're with you!!
 Reviewed By: Sailor Libra  On: November 18, 2001 09:38 CST
Comment/Review:
This is really goods. Have you started that mofia fanfic yet? I'm a little late in finding your fanfic. sorry. I'm sorta glad you didn't put a lemon in it. I'm not allowed tp read those.
 Reviewed By: majinsk8rvegeta  On: November 18, 2001 16:33 CST
Comment/Review:
the mafia fic will be posted soon and the next chap should be coming soon...im still working on it.
 Reviewed By: b/v fan!!!  On: November 18, 2001 17:52 CST
Comment/Review:
the last chapter had a tiny hint of lemon, which was cool. It sounded that you're experienced in writing lemons. well, keep writing the strory cuz im waiting for some more b/v reading!!!! Oh yeah, i found ur mafia fic and sounds cool. i hope ya add more gangs!!!
 Reviewed By: majinsk8rvegeta  On: November 20, 2001 11:01 CST
Comment/Review:
ok the next chapter should be available soon...maybe during the weekend...U see i'm workin' on my latest project 'The Saiyanos'...and the first chapter is very long. SO u should be able to read the next chap near the weekend!!!
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