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| "Rivalry" Reviews/Comments [ 4 ] | Reviewed By: vincents_lover_ffall [MediaMiner Member] On: August 29, 2006 23:18 CDT
Comment/Review:
Does YOU CANT STOP WRITING THIS! mean anything? Cause you cant! No! Keep writing! Turn this into a story! It has to be more than a one shot! This is from me and my friend Kira who insists (physically)*looks at author while kira smashes computer screen* that you keep writing this! K? Please! ;-)
| Reviewed By: panda_chan On: March 27, 2005 23:16 CST
Comment/Review:
A really awesome, well written, cream yourself before the end Lemon! However, I think you went a little overboard with the japanese stuff...we all know a little bit, but the amoutn you used was definitely beyond me, and I'm studying the language ^_^;; try to keep it a little more basic. Oh yeah, and kudos on not going for the same old pairings. I'm a yukix Suichi fan, but I am officially In love with Ryuichi and Kumagaorou (at least enough to make a Kumagorou plushie... erm...you didn't hear that ^^;; )
| Reviewed By: Ryu-San and Shu-San's lover. On: March 11, 2005 22:50 CST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Simply beautiful I adored this you have great talent in your writing. I might add a personel note here that it did make me wet thanks for relieving me :]
| Reviewed By: weeeeee On: February 25, 2005 20:13 CST
Comment/Review:
For some odd reason, the french letters do not show up..they only come out as weird symbols. ^^;;; Now, the concrit - For your first gravi fic, it's alright but it could be better if the minor grammar mistakes are fixed. However, what I noticed immediately is the flow of events in the fic...they seemed forced and are awkward at times. To me, the fic just did not *flow* nicely (I apologize if what I'm saying is not clear but I do not know any other way to epxress this). In addition, the random japanese dialogues are out of place especially since no footnotes are provided to translate its' meanings. Also, it wouldn't hurt to add more detail. Hmm, that's all I have to say. Work hard and I hope this review will help you with your future fics!
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