| "Destino" Reviews/Comments [ 27 ] |
| Pages (2): [ « ‹ 1 2 ] |
Title: ffrg review
Reviewed By: angelica incarnate [MediaMiner Member] On: May 30, 2005 11:50 CDT
Comment/Review:
Thanks for submitting your story to ffrg, it was a pleasure to read. You did a lovely job translating the characters from Japan to Spain and did especially well maintaining the class conflicts if you will. This is one of the rare cases where I will simply leave it at "this is a good AU fic" rather than say "why not try making them your own characters." For some things to watch for--check over your spelling. I know that you threw in a couple Spanish words and that worked well since even without previous knowledge I would have been able to understand them in context, but you did misspell a few words (violate=violet and, I think you misspelled secret as well). Also, watch the number of adjectives you string before a feature (ex. 'dark long black hair' is a bit much and a bit awkward). I'd say you have a beautifully crafted piece here and you write in a voice that is very pleasant to read. My Spanish is quite rusty, so forgive me if this is wrong, lol, but ¡me encanta!
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Title: FFRG
Reviewed By: Kellen [MediaMiner Member] On: May 26, 2005 17:50 CDT
Comment/Review:
Thank you for submitting to FFRG. This was a wonderful read. There isn't much I can say about the story. Although the setting was very different, you managed to keep the characters mostly in character. (I had a few problems with Kagome once in awhile, but I don't think I can put my finger on it. Perhaps it's because Kagome can be stubborn and argumentative at times and I didn't see that in this fic.) The description I though was beautiful. Simplistic enough not to be overwhelming, but beautifully and eloquently done. There were a few words in the story that threw me off, and it's a recurring problem through the story. There are words that are spelled right but are the wrong word, ie, you have "holly" instead of "holy", "composer" instead of "composure" and a few others sprinkled throughout the story. Great story, and I was glad I had the opportunity to read it. Cheers!
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Title: WOW!!
Reviewed By: InuyashaGirlie (Not logged in) On: May 22, 2005 16:54 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Hey, this was absolutely wonderful! I mean, really, WOW!! I have never read anything like this at all, and I love the fact that you intermixed the different cultures! :) I really love how everything is progressing and I must say that I'm estatic that you decided to write this and will be patiently waiting until you update it again! I swear I'm addicted to this one...I was at the edge of my seat the entire time I was reading it! :) Anyway, I was wondering if you knew about the site, www.notifylist.com? If not, its a site that allows you to sign up for a mailing list. I know a lot of fanfic authors who use it to notify their readers of when they update their stories. Basically you just sign up for an account and have the readers subscribe to your notifylist. Then you go in and write a note or something like that and it sends a message to everyone subscribed that you have updated. Anyway, I hope this solves your problem! I just thought it might be easier than, say, using an yahoo! group or something like that. Anyway, like I said, great chapter! Great story! I was really blown away with it and can't wait to read more! :)
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Reviewed By: leilachan not logged in On: May 13, 2005 15:00 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
i thought you did a great job of putting the characters together in a whole new way. you MUST be talented to do that and make it good! i'm looking forward to any new work that you may have for us fans. don't ever stop writing. ever.
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Reviewed By: ninja star On: May 10, 2005 23:17 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 7 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
An astounding job. The story was absolutely wonderful, a truely magnificent peice of work. Your use of the setting and surrounding culture was very creative. I really loved the story, and hope that it was as enjoyable for you to write, as it was for me to read.
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Reviewed By: Hououza On: May 10, 2005 17:20 CDT
Comment/Review:
Beautiful story. I think that it played out perfectly, Inuyasha may have been a little more eloquent but that fitted perfectly with his background and in the end he still kept his arrogant nature and thick headedness. Have I said before that I am but a poor English lad? Reading this makes me want to go and Spain, at least once. I've travelled so little it would be nice to see more of the world, I've already been to the west and east, perhaps somewhere closer at hand would be in order... I look forwards to BM being continued although like I said before, don't push yourself, no sense in risking an injury for us. Till next time good luck & best wishes, Hououza
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Reviewed By: angelbabe17(nsi) On: May 10, 2005 16:59 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
today's my birthday and this was the best present =D
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Title: WHOOHOO!
Reviewed By: rin^^(NLI) On: May 10, 2005 08:38 CDT
Comment/Review:
LOVEIT! It took me two days to read but it was definently worth it!^^
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Reviewed By: Precious [MediaMiner Member] On: May 10, 2005 01:04 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Yes you pulled tens all across the board. But I have come to expect such when it comes to your writings. I loved the plot. I forgot it was a one~shot for a moment! The way you made the characters talk, the part english part spanish gave them a real feel. Because that is the way most most Spanish-Americans talk. And even if you don't know the language you can use context clues to figure it out. And they way you kept InuYasha's lineage was prefect. Same feel different culture. It was so cute how defensive he got over killing guys that wanted to hurt Kagome. I'm also impressed with your use of the Shikon, very unique. I also like the way InuYasha, Sango, and Miroku became friends. Miroku and Sango were on point as being in character goes. They also seemed like a cute couple. And your descriptions of the places were fine. I think it was easier for you to "show" us since you used real places I had a eaiser time seeing it in my mind. I would love to gush more about how sweet they all are. The way you went about the characters and the story was beautiful but I seem to be getting low on my word counter. So in fear of having to delete anything to make it fit I'll just say I really do love this story amd of course we are waiting patciently for your updates. Good work takes time. (Oh and I like the story InuYasha told Kagome of how he came back for her. Romantic! And Kagome is right. I'd forget too! Thanks for explaning culture and vocabulary list.) Okay I promise I'm stopping here..... |
Reviewed By: PrncessS (not logged in) On: May 09, 2005 23:40 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 6 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
Wow! This is really good and I like it very much, I hope it's not just a one shot, I want to see what happens! It is well written and descriptive and I definitely feel like I can see the places you are writing about. Good job and please update soon! ^_^
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Reviewed By: cj flutterbye On: May 09, 2005 23:22 CDT
Comment/Review:
I enjoyed this very much.
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Title: Destino
Reviewed By: Dilanda Albata [MediaMiner Member] On: May 09, 2005 21:56 CDT
Comment/Review:
Good job there, buddy! I'm looking forward to an update...I didn't read your poem, but I will when you update ^^
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Reviewed By: Rogue-Xile [MediaMiner Member] On: May 09, 2005 21:43 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I liked the story alot, the imagery remided me alot of a place I once lived.
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Reviewed By: silver_eclipse On: May 09, 2005 21:37 CDT
Comment/Review:
WOW- I loved the story. You paint the images so well, and the plot was great. Keep writing!
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Reviewed By: serendith (not signed in) On: May 09, 2005 16:52 CDT
Comment/Review:
I almost wish you could continue with this as well! I loved that story! It was so very sweet. Today is my Birthday and that was a great contribution to the celebrations (especially considering I am at home finishing up a term paper that is due tomorrow!!). *sigh* The details you put into the story really made it a fun read.
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