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| "Experiment Ryuma" Reviews/Comments [ 7 ] | Reviewed By: WatcherWolf [MediaMiner Member] On: July 12, 2005 20:50 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Fantastic! Please update! So Ryuma gets dreams like Kanami? Of the past? Interesting....I'm glad to see Ryuhou and Kazuma are finally getting their act together, and the scenes you write between them just come out perfectly. And Ramsey's not so creepy as before, that's better. I think he'll make a good character addition.
| Reviewed By: WatcherWolf [MediaMiner Member] On: July 12, 2005 20:15 CDT
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
This just gets better and better as it goes. It's great to read more of this. I'm also WandererWolf on ff.net, so I'm a bit familar with this.
| Reviewed By: Saphire-Eyes On: July 12, 2005 18:11 CDT
Comment/Review:
This is really interesting! I can't wait to see how Ryuhou and Kazuma's relationship continues... Great job! I love your style of writing.
| Reviewed By: Sisco [MediaMiner Member] On: June 17, 2005 09:06 CDT
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
I'm going all the way!!! XD
| Title: Yep, another review from me...
Reviewed By: Eloy Brightdreamer [MediaMiner Member] On: June 17, 2005 02:23 CDT
Comment/Review:
YAY KISS!! ^__^ Though you might want to put somewhere in there an explaination as to why they haven't done this sooner, ne? I mean, it was pretty random the way Kazuma just kissed him then. Why did he decide to do it? Perhaps the next chapter can be from Kazuma's POV to explain that.
| Reviewed By: Eloy Brightdreamer [MediaMiner Member] On: June 15, 2005 00:11 CDT
Comment/Review:
Yay, I'm glad you decided to continue this! You seem to be setting up a lot to happen later, and I'm excited to see where this is going. I love the little bickering Ryuhou and Kazuma do... even after all these years. So like them. I was wondering, however, what exactly Ryuma's Alter looked like. You say it's on his left arm, yet give no description. Let the readers know! ^__^
| Reviewed By: Eloy Brightdreamer [MediaMiner Member] On: June 10, 2005 21:40 CDT
Comment/Review:
Hmm, well, I won't tell you that you need a beta, but... I'm willing to help out, if you want. I did find three small typos that spellcheck would miss: "blood hurdling scream" should be "blood curdling". "finding the bolder beside him" should be spelled "boulder". "shuttering breath" should be "shuddering breath". Now, on to an actual review! I think you've got a good start here, and I'm intrigued to read more. Ryuhou and Kazuma still haven't admitted their feelings, even after 16 years? How very like them. XD Ryuma seems like he will be an interesting character too... it's difficult to write a good OC, but from what I see, you have a decent start. Now, one little thing... I find it highly presumptuous that you say "no criticism." Even the best writers, professional writers, accept critique. You seem to realize that this is not a good thing to say, so why say it? And flamers are fun to laugh at! XD If they flame your story for being yaoi, so what? Anyway, yep, that would be my only criticism. XD I'm only saying that because I really do like what you've got so far, and I would like to see more. If you do want a betareader, I'd be happy to help you out. There should be more good s-CRY-ed fanfiction out there, and I want to encourage new authors as much as possible.
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