"What if..." Reviews/Comments [ 3 ] |
Reviewed By: killerman83ca [MediaMiner Member] On: February 02, 2008 13:35 CST Comment/Review: I have read what you have put down so far. I don't know what to say to this story. I would like to know what is going to happen next so please update soon.
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Reviewed By: yenom [MediaMiner Member] On: August 17, 2005 05:42 CDT Rating(s):Style of Writing: 4 of 10 Spelling & Grammar: 10 of 10 Originality/Creativity: 5 of 10 Enjoyment Factor: 5 of 10 Overall Rating: 6 of 10 Comment/Review: Not bad has a different spin on that point in the story. Only thing is lacks is interaction between any of the cast including motoko and keitaro. you have point a and point b of the story but there is know meat no depth it just sort or jump where you want it. like you should of had a little bit for them training, saying bye atleast to the people in the dorm before going to fight her sister. hopefully you can take what you have and just write so of the meat of it inbetween.
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Reviewed By: seph6 On: June 21, 2005 08:11 CDT Comment/Review: Its very good, but isnt this story from fanfictio.net before the nc-17 became forbiden? Wasnt you who did a serie where Keitaro have sex with all the girls? If yes, i would like to see they again.
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