Bleach Fan Fiction ❯ Different Circumstances ❯ The Reunion: Part Two ( Chapter 4 )

Tite Kubo owns Bleach and the characters depicted therein. The characters in this story are not mine.

 

The Reunion: Part Two

 

I walked into the room. Zaraki was sitting on the side of the bed, waiting.

 

“What took so frigging long?” he asked abruptly. His eyes were hard as he looked at me.

 

The tone of his voice took me by surprise. I stood still.

 

“What took so long?” he repeated. His voice contained little warmth. What did he think I had been doing? What could you do in a bathroom?

 

“Nothing,” I replied with a quaver in my voice. His anger was unexpected and made me nervous.

 

He got to his feet and walked over to me. “I almost came in to see if you'd passed out or something,” he said standing near me.

 

He looked down, his mouth a sharp line in his face, but that didn't matter to me. He was standing close; that mattered more. I had to touch him. My hand reached out and my palm came to rest on his chest. As my palm made contact with his skin I felt his sharp intake of breath at my touch.

 

“Damn you woman. A simple touch shouldn't affect me like this. One touch from you and I want you again,” he said as he pulled me to him.

 

I relaxed into his embrace, feeling his warm skin meld against mine. My breasts were crushed against his chest and I could feel his erection against my stomach. I didn't trust myself to speak; I didn't trust myself at all. My resolution to say nothing was severely strained as my body reacted to his closeness.

 

I knew what I wanted to do, but was unsure how he would react. Freeing myself slightly from his clutch I sank to my knees and brought my mouth close to his penis. I wanted to taste him this time. I wanted to taste myself on him and feel him between my lips. “Besides,” I reasoned, “if my mouth is full, I can't talk.”

 

I delicately touched my tongue to the tip of his penis. It leapt against my tongue and Zaraki did not object. Encouraged I ran my tongue down the length of his penis to the sac underneath. Zaraki's breathing roughened a little as his hands reached down and tangled in my hair. Encouraged I licked his full length again, slowly, feeling the skin react to the touch of my tongue.

 

I poised my lips over his erection and then encircled the head with my mouth. There was no possibility that I would be able to take the full length into my mouth, but I wanted to try. As I sucked the head gently, I could savour the mingling of our juices. It was faint, but it was possible to taste. I agreed with his earlier comments. I liked the combination of our juices but I wanted to taste him the way he had tasted me.

 

Zaraki pushed his hips against my face. I could feel the heat of his skin increasing. I caressed his sac with my fingers as I pushed my mouth further down his length. The feel of his hardness within my mouth was turning me on even more. My hands reached around and kneaded the firm flesh of his buttocks as I worked on him. His hands were still through my hair, but he was not resisting. I thought I could hear him groan.

 

I decided to change tack and laved him with my tongue, alternately sucking and licking him. I could feel him begin to tighten as I took him into my mouth again. I slid my mouth over his penis, as far as I could. It filled my mouth and I then proceeded to slide it back and forth, feeling a sense of power. I could tell he was enjoying it. My fingers were now cupping his sac and I could feel how tightly they were drawn against his body. I could feel the dampness between my thighs increase. I wanted him in my mouth, I wanted him inside me. The urge was too much. I slid a hand between my legs as I licked the length of his penis again, and then took him in my mouth. I began to touch myself as I sucked him. I felt so much in need.

 

“Oh, God, Matsumoto,” Zaraki growled, using my hair to gently pull my face away from his penis.

 

I knelt there, disappointed. I really wanted him to come in my mouth.

 

He picked me up and holding me against him, inserted his fully engorged penis into me. I wrapped my legs around his thighs as he thrust deeply into me. As he filled me, I pushed down, eager to feel his full length.

 

“I wanted you to come in my mouth. I wanted to taste you,” I groaned, my head against his chest, and my arms around his neck. “Oh, that feels so good.”

 

“I had to get inside you again. I saw you touching yourself and it drove me wild. Your mouth is good, but this is so much better,” Zaraki panted. Still carrying me, he moved toward the wall.

 

“I'm going to have you against the wall, like I wanted to when we first got here,” he said huskily. “Good thing I'm strong.”

 

I felt rather nervous as I had not had sex against a wall when my feet were not touching the floor. But it felt so good to have him fully within me.

 

Bracing me against the wall, he began to quickly thrust into me. Each thrust caused the bells in his hair to tinkle. I felt the wall hard against my back as I held on to him tightly. This position meant I felt him penetrate me even more deeply. I squirmed on his penis, wanting him to continue forever, or at least until I was satisfied. When that would be I didn't know. Even though I had come twice already, I hadn't had enough. I wanted to continue until neither of us could move. The only problem was the words I was scared would spill from my mouth.

 

Having sex in this position, made it hard for me to kiss him. I felt my nipples hardening as I grew more excited. His penis seemed to grow in size and the friction was intense. His thrusts quickened, too soon for me. Zaraki groaned and shuddered as his semen spurted hot into me. I hadn't come. As he rested his forehead against mine, I felt a twinge of disappointment.

 

“I could have held on longer if you hadn't sucked me,” he said, panting heavily.

 

“I wanted you to come in my mouth,” I said still aroused, but not knowing what would happen next.

 

“Not today, probably not tomorrow,” he said as he slowly withdrew. “I told you I want to fuck you. Don't worry. I won't leave you unsatisfied.”

 

Carrying me back to the bed he place me down and kissed me lingeringly as his hand touched me, playing with my clit. I moved against his hand, wanting more.

 

“I have to taste you again,” he said as he buried his face between my thighs. He spread me wide and licked me, one long slow lick. I quivered as his tongue grazed me. Remembering the previous time I expected a long, torturous tease as he drove me out my mind. It's always a bad idea to try to predict what Zaraki will do.

 

He licked me again, missing my clit, but sliding his tongue into me fully. I tensed as I felt him enter me, anticipating a removal and a pause. Instead he licked my clit quickly, fast cat like licks, and then sucked me. A few moments were all I could handle before I lost control and came, shrieking his name again. He continued to lick me until I had finished.

 

When I opened my eyes it was to see his grinning face above me. “Taste me,” he said before he kissed me.

 

His mouth tasted hot and I experienced the salty pungent flavour of our juices. I sucked his tongue and licked him in a frenzy to absorb all of the taste I could. As I tasted I could smell the scent. Damn, the man was getting to me. I couldn't get enough. I had never kissed him with such intensity and he responded, passionately.

 

Zaraki finally pulled away. “That was different,” he commented, giving me a strange look.

 

I flushed, embarrassed at the frenzy I had displayed. “I was a little carried away,” I explained.

 

“I noticed,” he said as he moved to lie beside me, not touching me.

 

I was too scared of his reaction and my feelings to move any closer. If I touched him I might start babbling. Maybe he didn't want me to touch him.

 

I looked at his face. His brow was furrowed while he stared at the ceiling and seemed oblivious to my presence. I sighed and looked at the ceiling also. I had seen it before and it hadn't changed since I last looked.

 

My mind was racing. “What is he thinking about? Did I scare him when I kissed him? Why isn't he touching me? Should I talk to him? Should I touch him? Is it over between us already? Should I just go? Can I spend any more time with him? I'm too nervous to stay and I'm too scared to go. Why can't I control my emotions?”

 

Too many stupid questions and no answers; and no easy way to obtain the answers. I should go, make some excuse or other. I'd had sex with him once more as I'd hoped. If I left now, I could possibly join a drinking session where I could forget all this, forget how I felt. I had to end it now. I shifted on the bed, preparing to get up.

 

Zaraki, sensing the movement reached out and pulled me close to him, embracing me. My head again rested on his chest and I was wrapped in his warmth. “Don't think you're leaving, Matsumoto. Not yet. Not until I'm ready to let you go.”

 

I stiffened in his arms. His embrace was affecting me in the worst possible way. I bit down on my tongue, hard. The words were forming in my mind and in my mouth.

 

“I was wondering about that last kiss, Matsumoto. No one has ever kissed me in a frenzy of passion before. No woman has reacted to me the way you do. I asked this question before and you didn't answer. I want you to answer me now. Do you like me?” Zaraki asked.

 

I swallowed. “Damn, I must be so transparent,” I thought. But it gave me an idea of how I could leave.

 

“I'll answer you on one condition,” I replied, letting my hand touch his cheek.

 

“I don't do conditional answers,” Zaraki stated. I knew he didn't like conditions unless they were his conditions.

 

“You don't meet the condition, I don't answer the question,” I said with as much firmness as I could summon, still stroking his cheek. Realising how my gesture could be interpreted, I snatched my hand away and rested it lightly on his chest. I would not caress him, it made everything so obvious.

 

“What's the condition?” he grated. It seemed he might actually consider my request. I hoped this would work.

 

“Remove the bells from your hair and I will answer the question,” I said calmly. Unless he cut the bells off it would take precious minutes for all the bells to be removed. I wanted those moments.

 

“What sort of condition is that? Why?” Zaraki seemed perplexed by the condition. He reached to touch the bells and appeared to think better of it as he dropped his hand.

 

“I find the bells distracting when we have sex. I'm worried about developing a Pavlovian reaction to the sound of bells,” I explained. It was true. I did find the bells distracting, tinkling as he thrust into me. I preferred him without them.

 

“It will take a little time to remove them,” he said thoughtfully. His eyes were distant as if he was thinking about the length of time it would take.

 

My guess was right. It would take time. “If you want me to answer your question, that's the price.” It seemed that my condition would be met. I had not expected it to be this easy.

 

“You answer me first and I'll remove the bells,” he bargained, his hand caressing my back.

 

“I don't know why this is so important to you, Zaraki. Remove the bells and I'll give you my answer,” I said with finality. I had to be firm because the answer was on the tip of my tongue.

 

He moved so he was facing me. I missed being pillowed by his chest and feeling his warmth. He placed his fingers under my chin and tilted my head so I was looking into his eyes. “Tell me, now,” he said and kissed me sweetly.

 

It was too much; when he kissed me;, I became blind to reason. I pulled away. “Until you remove the bells, I won't tell you anything. I won't kiss you,” I rasped.

 

“I could take you by force, again,” he said, his hand sliding temptingly between my legs.

 

“We both know that wasn't rape. You prefer your partners to be willing. I believe you mentioned that earlier,” I said as calmly as I could while fighting my response to his touch. I hoped that I sounded convincing.

 

Zaraki sighed and rose from the bed. “You win. I'll remove the bells and then you will answer all my questions, not only the one I asked just now.”

 

“I will answer all your questions,” I said, knowing I would never willingly answer any of his questions. It would be foolish to do so.

 

I waited until he closed the bathroom door before searching for the replacement uniforms he'd mentioned. I found them and quickly dressed. As quietly as I could, I retrieved my zanpaku-to and left. I knew I was doing something stupid; really stupid. I wasn't thinking rationally. I wasn't even thinking. I was driven by a fear of loss so intense that I decided to be the one to make the choice to lose. Zaraki might say he cared, he might even care a little, but it was better this way. If I said what I wanted to say it would be over. I wanted to choose how to end the affair and this insult would end it between us, I expected. His pride would not allow him to forget.

 

I did say I wasn't thinking. I'm always at my worst when I give into emotions. That was how Gin managed to gain so much control over me. With him I could never separate emotions from thought and he knew that so well. I was blind to his faults; constantly hoping he would return, even after he distanced himself from me. I'd always hoped he would forgive me for my momentary foolishness. Sometimes I even fantasised that he had learnt the truth and returned to me, full of apologies and love, ready to cherish me. So much wasted time and emotion. That was why I had sworn off emotion, and yet, here I was again allowing my thoughts to be overruled by my passions.

 

I had to get away from Zaraki, stay away from Zaraki or I would end up in the same emotional mess as before. One more minute with the man and I would be sobbing, on my knees confessing… Confessing how I felt. I couldn't even allow my thoughts to frame the words I wanted to say to him. I had to leave.

 

As I left Zaraki's quarters I noticed that the sun was now setting. We had arrived back in Soul Society in the early afternoon. This was the time that my friends met to discuss the events of the day, while having a social drink. I'd visit them. Hurriedly, I made my way home, washed and tried to tidy up. I then walked to Captain Ukitake's place. My friends would help distract me as they had in the past. From the noise and singing it seemed a party was already in progress. I pushed open the door and entered the room.

 

Everyone turned to look at me. I quickly hugged them all. It was good to see them again. After a few minutes spent greeting each of them, a small warmed bottle of sake was pushed in my hands.

 

“Sit down and tell us what happened,” Captain Ukitake requested. He smiled at me with his usual sweet smile. I realised how much I'd missed him.

 

“In the human world?” I asked sipping from the bottle feeling the warmth of the sake spread through me; it did not compare to the warmth of feeling Zaraki hold me. I rejected that thought.

 

“No. We're more interested in what happened with Captain Zaraki. We heard you were with him today, that he'd carried you of as soon as you arrived back. We weren't expecting you tonight, otherwise we would have waited,” Hisagi said. He was leaning against the wall, relaxed and seemingly at peace.

 

“So, is he any good?”

 

“Does he take off the eye-patch?”

 

“Does he have kinky tastes?”

 

I looked at the eager faces of my friends. “Unfair,” I said. “I never ask about your liaisons.” I realised that comment was not just. No one had asked me about one particular previous liaison. That subject had always been avoided by unspoken accord. I didn't know if they guessed what had happened, but I would never tell them. It would serve no purpose.

 

“But none of us have been so public in our relationships. He must be good or you wouldn't have gone back that first day,” Kira answered eventually. He winked at me and raised his sake bottle.

 

I blushed. They were right about the publicity our relationship had received. The events of today would have just confirmed everything. “I'm not answering your questions,” I said. “Did you miss me?”

 

“Touchy about the good captain? Does that mean you finished with him, already? Will we have to avoid him because he's in a bad mood,” Captain Kyoraku asked. “Captain Zaraki in a foul mood is something I dread. He's likely to challenge anyone and everyone. It upsets me.”

 

“I haven't really finished with him,” I said taking a swig of sake. The room fell silent as all eyes were fixed on me.

 

“You haven't really finished with him and you came here? What does that mean? Did you come from his place? Does he know you're here,” Captain Kyoraku asked nervously.

 

“I don't know. I don't want to talk about it. I only wanted to have a drink; is that a problem?” I asked, worried by their reaction.

 

“God, Ran. He probably sees you as his property. You're still new in the relationship with him. If you left him and came here, he'll find you. Don't you understand how possessive the Captain is? I think you should go home, or back to his place, now,” Kira advised. His normally pale complexion was even whiter than normal. His eyes looked around the room as if trying to find an exit.

 

Hisagi nodded agreement his relaxed pose had changed into one of someone expecting an attack at any moment. I looked at my friends. You don't want me here?” I said stunned. I began to feel a little unsettled.

 

“We do want you here, but under different circumstances. Not when Captain Zaraki is likely to turn up any minute and….” Captain Ukitake eyes widened as he looked behind me and stopped speaking.

 

“Not when Captain Zaraki is likely to turn up any minute and what?” a familiar voice asked from behind me.

 

I wasn't ready for this. The voice caused shivers to run over my body. I wanted to run away, I wanted to hide. Mostly I wanted to throw my arms around him and kiss him. I slowly turned and my heart leapt. It was obvious that I hadn't guessed his reaction correctly. My friends had known he would turn up and I had foolishly believed he would not.

 

Zaraki had removed the bells from his hair. He must have dressed quickly as he was not wearing his captain's coat, or his eye-patch.

 

“Hello Brother Captain,” Captain Kyoraku said pleasantly. “Do you want some sake?”

 

“I'm interested in how you were going to finish that sentence, Ukitake,” Zaraki said, glaring at him.

 

“Just that you were likely to turn up any minute to see if the pretty lieutenant of 10th Division was here,” Captain Ukitake said smoothly, looking coolly at Zaraki.

 

“You're right. I am here looking for the lieutenant of the 10th Division. Lieutenant, come with me,” Zaraki ordered. He hesitated a few seconds and then added, “Please.”

 

I looked at my friends. They shrugged, or shook their heads. There would be no help there. Somehow I hadn't expected any, not this time.

 

“Okay. I'm coming,” I said reluctantly, not wishing to start a fight in public. If I had to argue with him it would be better if we were alone. I drank the small amount of sake left in the bottle and placed it on the table. “Talk to you later,” I said as I left.

 

Zaraki preceded me out the door. Once we had left the house he picked me up and flung me over his shoulder without any comment. He began to move quickly back to his place. Being held like a bag of flour wounded my dignity and made it impossible for me to talk. It hurt as I bounced on his shoulder. I did not like this. I was angry with Zaraki for treating me like a naughty child and I objected to the indignity of being carried in this manner.

 

When we arrived back at him place Zaraki took me into the bedroom and placed me on the bed.

 

“Take your clothes off, now,” he ordered as he left the room.

 

I stood up, angry at his treatment of me, refusing to obey his order and wondering what was going to happen now. Why had he left the room?

 

“I've locked the door. If you want to leave, you have to ask my permission,” Zaraki said as he returned to the bedroom. “Why are you still dressed and standing?”

 

“I've told you before that I detest being ordered around,” I said harshly, glaring at him. “I hate it when my captain does it; I hate it when you do it.”

 

“You know what I hate? I hate it when my sex partner, that's you, requests I take the bells out of my hair. You left without explanation while I was carrying out your request,” Zaraki retorted, steel in his tone. He returned my glare.

 

“His sex partner. That's all he sees me as. Even though he said he cared, he only sees me as his sex partner,” I thought, my anger rising.

 

“Why did you leave?” Zaraki moved closer to me, his eyes intent on my face.

 

“I wanted to see my friends. I haven't seen them since I went to the human world. I missed them,” I replied tersely. Any minute now I was going to fling my body into his arms.

 

“You were with me. Why was it important to see your friends tonight? I thought we were spending tonight with each other. It's been too long. Why did you leave?” Zaraki asked harshly.

 

I looked at him, my mouth shut tight. I would not answer that question.

 

“I'll ask again. Why did you leave? I took off the bells at your request and came out here and you were gone. I went to your place and you weren't there. I guessed the bells were just an excuse so you could leave. You wanted to leave me,” Zaraki stated. I shrugged, unwilling to say anything. Zaraki grabbed me by the shoulders.

 

“Why did you want to leave? I demand an answer. You owe me an explanation,” he said through gritted teeth. His anger was evident in the way his hands bit into my shoulders.

 

“I wanted the bells removed. When you were in the bathroom, I gave into an impulse to go and see my friends. You don't own me Zaraki. I don't have to explain myself to you. I'm not your toy,” I replied sulkily tugging at his hands, unable to shift them.

 

“You are mine, woman. I've claimed you and claimed you publicly. Remember? Everyone knows you belong to me, except you. I thought you understood,” Zaraki rasped his hands tightening.

 

“I'm a slow learner. My friends told me to come back to you. They're scared of you,” I was beginning to feel a little fearful also. I had never seen Zaraki in such a rage.

 

“Your friends are more sensible than you,” Zaraki observed grimly. His hands were hurting me. I tried to shrug them off, but his grip tightened even further.

 

“I wanted some sake. I wanted to unwind and catch up on the gossip,” I said feebly by way of explanation.

 

Zaraki was shaking his head. “You have been apart from me for all this time. You were angry with me for not looking at you in the human world. I've told you I care about you; I don't understand. All the time I was removing the bells I was thinking about fucking you again. I was so hard it was distracting me. I came back into this room and you'd gone! I guessed where you'd gone, but I didn't know why. Are you trying to finish what we have?”

 

I shrugged again, not knowing how to respond. Zaraki shook me. I hated feeling like a doll in Zaraki's grasp.

 

“Do you want to end it?” he demanded.

 

“You're hurting me. You embarrassed me in front of my friends,” I yelled, trying to change the subject.

 

“You embarrassed me in front of your friends,” he grated. “But you're avoiding the question. Do you want to end it?”

 

Again I did not know how to answer. I stood, silent. I knew I should end it but I wanted him to hold me within his arms again. My head drooped as my uncertainty grew.

 

“Do you want to end it?” he asked slowly again, his hands still firm on my shoulders, but without the associated pain.

 

I felt annoyed at the constant barrage of questions. “I don't have any freedom anymore because of you. My friends don't want to spend time with me; people are scared of your reactions. You set spies on me,” I accused.

 

“Do you think I have any freedom? I am a Captain. I have to be careful. Don't you understand? Having you in my life has made it so much harder. People don't want us to be together. You're making me vulnerable.” The tone of Zaraki's voice was different. Looking at his eyes I could see that he was still angry, and in conflict within himself.

 

The truth behind the words was evident. I knew people wanted us to part. I didn't wish to weaken him as I admired his strength. At the same time I felt an overwhelming anger at him. I was making him vulnerable? “I'll leave then. I want to end it. Our relationship is at an end. We'll pretend none of this happened,” I said as I jerked away from his retraining hands and walked toward the door.

 

If I had not been furious I would never have been able to say those words. As I began to move out of the room, Zaraki moved between me and the door.

 

“You can't leave. Even if you do wish to end it, I have to agree. I don't give you my permission to leave and you still have not answered my original question,” he pointed out, coldly. “I fulfilled my part of the bargain. Now you have to tell me the truth.”

 

I gulped and my anger began to be replaced by fear. I'd forgotten the bargain. Knowing what he was going to ask I tried to think of a way of withholding the answer. If I answered he would know how weak I was and that would give him authority over me. After my last experience I never wanted anyone to have that power.

 

“Do you like me?” Zaraki asked moving one pace closer. Was he trying to intimidate me into an answer?

 

“Why do you want to know? I'm making you vulnerable,” I hedged looking longingly at the door.

 

“Answer the question,” he insisted, as he closed the gap. Only inches were between us.

 

I took a deep breath. “It will soon be over,” I assured myself. “If I drop all pretence and tell him the truth, I will be able to leave and life will return to normal.”

 

I looked into Zaraki's eyes. “I like you,” I said and awaited his reaction, trying to remain calm. He nodded his eyes fixed on mine. I waited for more reaction, but there was none. What did nodding mean?

 

“I said, I like you, Zaraki.” Saying those words soothed me and made it easier to stop the other words fighting to escape my mouth. He nodded once more, his eyes still fixed on my face.

 

I threw my hands up in exasperation. “It doesn't matter how I feel. I want to end it. May I go now?” I asked.

 

“No. You can't leave, and it isn't over,” Zaraki replied moving ever closer so his body was tight against mine. “Take off your clothes.”

 

“No. I don't want to take off my clothes. I want to leave,” I said as took me in his arms and kissed me.

 

I fought against him, trying to push him away as he held me close. He didn't try to do anything more than kiss me gently, his lips pressed against mine. My struggles grew less the longer he held me. I could feel the warmth of his body through my clothes. I inhaled his scent. The warmth, the kiss, the feel of his body against mine, weakened my resolve.

 

“Take your clothes off, Matsumoto,” Zaraki said still holding me close after he stopped kissing me.

 

“Why?” I asked, rebelliously.

 

“Why do you think? Come on woman. I want you again, now.” I could feel the evidence of his need, hard against me.

 

I shook my head. “I said it's over. Why aren't you listening to me?” I was beginning to lose the fight. I didn't even try to push him away. I wanted him to hold me. Hearing him tell me he wanted me again made my blood heat. I wanted to rip his clothes off and let him take me any way he would.

 

“You told me you were finished with me once before. You weren't finished with me then, and you're not finished with me now. You like me. You want to taste me. You want me too,” Zaraki said with immense confidence, his lips near my ear.

 

The confidence was well placed. I was wavering. It would not take much for him to persuade me to stay. I vaguely wondered how long it would be before I said those three stupid words.

 

“I told you it's not over. It's not over until we both agree and I don't agree. You are being stubborn, Matsumoto, beloved,” he said kissing me again.

 

This time his tongue teased its way between my lips. The word, he'd used the word “beloved” again. Was it just because he was aroused and wanted me, or was there something more? I hesitated briefly before I returned his kiss.

 

 

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