Card Captor Sakura Fan Fiction / Gundam Wing Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction / Tenchi Muyo Fan Fiction / Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ The Anime World ❯ More Good Guys ( Chapter 4 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

This is the story of several popular anime characters that were all forced to move into a small apartment. It doesn't really make much sense, but it's good for a few laughs every now and then. Anyway, it never actually happened... hopefully. If it did, I didn't do it and can't be blamed.

Disclaimer: Ryoko & Yugi belong to Pioneer; Cell, Vegeta, & Goku belong to Akira Toriyama; Serena, Reenie & Hotaru belong to Naoko Takeuchi; and Heero belongs to Sunrise. The Real World belongs to MTV and happens to be a great show. I'm not getting paid.

The Anime World 4: More Good Guys

Day Five
6:45 AM

[Serena sneaks into the kitchen, being careful not to wake up Goku, who is asleep on the floor. She carefully picks up the phone and dials a number. It is picked up on the second ring.]

Voice: Cartoon Network Suggestions Department. How may I help you?

Serena: This is Serena, from The Anime World. Listen, could you guys send over some more good guys? We're really going to need them.

Voice: I'm sorry, but we don't have any plans for more-

Serena: PLEASE! There's all these scary guys with beady eyes and drool and...I'm afraid something terrible is going to happen to me! You HAVE to send over more good guys right away!

Voice: Calm down, ma'am. We-

Serena: NO! Either you send over more good guys, or you risk losing the star of one of your most popular shows! It'll be pretty hard to keep running Sailor Moon without Sailor Moon! You'll never be able to get the final season in dubs!

Voice: ...I'll have some sent right over.

[Serena hangs up, then turns around and screams as she finds Cell in front of her.]

Cell: Who was that?

Serena: Um...no one?

Cell: You were asking for more heroes, weren't you?

Serena: (laughs nervously) What would give you that idea?

Cell: I was listening on the extension. Give it up, blondie.

Serena: (backs away) Hey, I think I hear Reenie calling me...I'll just...go see what she wants...like a good future-mother-to-be. Bye!

[Serena runs to Heero's bedroom and slams the door. She then spots Reenie, Hotaru, and Yugi in bed with Heero. Seconds after she convinces herself that it is really happening, she screams, waking up everyone in the apartment.]

Heero: (groggily) I thought I said no waking me up for any reason, people. (notices Serena) Oh, it's you.

Serena: WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!

Heero: Well, I was sleeping peacefully, until your banshee powers suddenly manifested.

Serena: GET YOUR HANDS OFF THEM!!! (yanks Reenie & Hotaru away from the bed)

Heero: Hey, they're the ones that begged to sleep in my bed. You want to yell, yell at them. I'm going back to bed. (pulls a pillow over his head)

Reenie: Serena, we were only sleeping with him because Vegeta-

Serena: I don't want to hear it! I don't care what century it is, I'm still your mother! And Hotaru, surely your father taught you better!

Hotaru: But Vegeta was going to-

Vegeta: Would you keep it down?! Some people are trying to sleep here!

[Serena drags Reenie & Hotaru into the kitchen, where Cell has started breakfast.]

Serena: If you think for one minute that I'm going to let this go on, you're crazy!

Cell: You girls prefer syrup or fruit topping on your waffles?

[Goku wakes up at the mention of food.]

Goku: Hey, what's all the noise about?

Cell: Serena's mad because Reenie & Hotaru were in Heero's bed.

Goku: Heero's not so bad. He's actually a hero, if you want to get technical.

Serena: No hero takes young girls to bed with him!

Cell: So I suppose it's okay for Darien to date a girl in high school...

Serena: Quiet, you! We haven't even...that's none of your business!

Reenie: Heero was only protecting us! The same way Tuxedo Mask does! Only Heero's a little cuter...

Hotaru: Besides, you had Goku to protect you out here. Vegeta still sleeps in the same room as us!

Serena: Yeah, well, Cell stays out here most of the time, too. Why don't you guys just fix the bedroom that was damaged?

Goku: I guess we never thought about it. I could do it, with some help. Any volunteers?

Cell: I'd do it, but I tend to shed when I perform manual labor. Not a pretty sight.

Reenie: Ew...

* * * * *

Heero's Interview

Guy: So tell me, Heero. Is it difficult to control yourself around the younger girls?

Heero: (firmly) No. I'm totally devoted to Yugi and her happiness.

Guy: O...kay. So Hotaru and Reenie won't be disrupting that relationship in any way?

Heero: They can try, but ultimately, they'll fail.

Guy: Just what I wanted to hear. (loudly) GIRLS! HE SAID OKAY!

[Hotaru & Reenie run into room and smother Heero with hugs and kisses. Guy starts to laugh, but suddenly stops and gets a weird look in his eyes. He gets a running start and dives out of an open window. No one seems to notice Yugi in the shadows, her eyes glowing bright red.]

* * * * *

12:56 PM

[Yugi is in the kitchen, preparing a late lunch of tacos, burritos, and rice. Goku, Serena, Reenie, and Hotaru are watching a tape of old Sailor Moon episodes.]

Goku: Okay, so why does that guy always throw a rose?

Serena: Because he's really cool and romantic.

Goku: But wouldn't a brick or a rock be more effective?

Serena: ...You are SO lucky to have a wife. Did you ever find someone to help you fix the bedroom?

Goku: Well, no. I thought about calling home and asking Gohan to help, but Chi-chi hates for him to stop studying for anything.

[The doorbell rings.]

Yugi: Who could that be?

Hotaru: Maybe we got really lucky and a carpenter got lost?

Reenie: We've never been THAT lucky.

[Serena runs to the door, but Cell suddenly appears in front of it.]

Cell: Can we help you?

Voice1: Um...did someone request some heroes?

Serena: YES!

Voice2: Well, open the door!

[Cell opens the door, then vanishes into one of the bedrooms. Tenchi walks in, wearing a toolbelt. Li, who is scowling, as usual, follows him.]

Tenchi: I was told there's a bedroom that needs fixing?

Goku: Great! A volunteer at last!

[Goku grabs Tenchi and drags him to the former bedroom. Li notices the three girls on the couch.]

Li: Oh, great. I was better off with Avalon and Meilin.

[Yugi walks over.]

Yugi: Dinner's ready, so get it while it's...(notices Li)...who are you?

Li: Who are you?

Yugi: I asked you first.

Hotaru: This would be so much easier if you people just said your names...

Serena: Never mind. Her name is Yugi. Now who are you?

Li: My name is Li Showrun, and I-

[There is a loud shriek from one of the bedrooms, followed by a bright flash of light.]

Li: I would REALLY like to know what that was.

[Cell returns, trying his best not to look suspicious. However, he now has yellow, catlike eyes and a head full of gray hair. There is also a red jewel on his wrist.]

Yugi: Cell, you didn't!

Cell: (calmly) I don't know what you're talking about.

Yugi: You absorbed Ryoko!

Cell: I didn't. You children and your active imaginations...

Yugi: I'm telling Vegeta!

Cell: Even if I DID absorb Ryoko, he wouldn't care. They're separated, remember?

Yugi: Okay, you've got a point. But it's still wrong!

Cell: You should be taking notes, Yugi. This is an apartment full of evil.

Serena: WAS an apartment full of evil. That's why we're here.

Cell: Yes... (licks his lips)

Reenie: Serena, he's doing it again!!!

Li: I can see this is going to take some getting used to. Where am I sleeping?

Hotaru: Well, once the new bedroom is finished-

[Reenie elbows Hotaru in the side.]

Reenie: Actually, you could stay in Heero's room.

Li: Who's that?

Cell: The only one here with a gun.

Li: I feel safer already. (walks away)

Hotaru: Reenie, why'd you hit me?

Reenie: Because he's way cute and you're being stupid!

Hotaru: So that means you're not interested in Heero, right?

Reenie: I never said-

Hotaru: So I can have him, right?

Yugi: (holds up a knife) Touch him and die. Are you people going to eat or not?

* * * * *

9:26 PM

[Everyone is gathered in the kitchen/living room for dinner (it is getting pretty crowded in here). Tenchi suddenly notices the jewel on Cell's wrist.]

Tenchi: Hey, where'd you get that?

Yugi: He ate Ryoko!

Cell: Squealer.

Vegeta: Who cares?! Pass the macaroni before I blast you all!

[Tenchi quickly passes the macaroni bowl. He doesn't notice the dreamy look Serena has in her eyes as he does so...]

Goku: Vegeta, you haven't been taking your blood pressure medicine, have you?

Vegeta: Shut up, you fool!

Tenchi: Is there anyone here that doesn't shout, scream, or yell?

Cell: Not for long, no.

Serena: So Tenchi, do you have any girlfriends back home?

Tenchi: Well, six of them, if you believe the commercials, but...why do you ask?

Serena: No reason. (giggles)

[Cell suddenly jumps up.]

Cell: Okay, I did it! I ATE Ryoko! And I'd do it again, dangit! You know why?!

Everyone Else: ...No.

Cell: Because HE was coming here! (points wildly at Tenchi) And I couldn't stand the thought of that evil woman corrupting a perfectly good hero!

Tenchi: ...but you're evil.

Cell: I'm also a purist. Evil and good just don't mix.

Yugi: Heero isn't evil, and we're together.

Cell: That's different; he's a mass murderer.

Reenie & Hotaru: He is?!

Heero: I couldn't help it. I was trained to kill since I was a kid.

Reenie: Yeah, but that's the kind of thing you tell a girl before you get involved with-

Yugi: He is NOT involved with you!

Reenie: (smirks) That's what YOU say.

Yugi: (whines) Heero!

[Heero pulls out his gun and points it at Reenie.]

Reenie: ...what are you doing?

Heero: Defending my fiancée's honor.

Everyone Else: Your WHAT?!

Yugi: (giggles) Whoops! I got a little eager with the mind control. He meant girlfriend, honest!

Serena: THAT doesn't make it much better.

Vegeta: (angrily) Are you doubting the will of the High Goddess Supreme?!

Goku: (glares) That wouldn't be very smart, Serena.

Cell: Cut it out, Yugi. That's enough mind control for you tonight. Now take your boy toy and go to bed.

[Yugi frowns, but takes Heero by the hand and leads him away.]

Serena: How come she never tries to control you?

Cell: (smirks) She knows better. Anyway, the bedroom has been fixed, and since I STILL have the highest power level, I'm making the sleeping arrangements. Reenie & Hotaru have graciously volunteered to stay in Heero's room, so by popular demand, Serena & Tenchi share the new bedroom. And by popular demand, I mean the fact that Serena begged me to do it, and no one disagreed with her.

Tenchi: Now wait just a min-

Serena: (sweetly) Don't you WANT to share it with me, Tenchi?

Tenchi: (blushes) Um...well...I...

Cell: Of course he does, the lucky dog. So, Vegeta now gets his own bedroom since Ryoko isn't here anymore, and Li's stuck with Heero and Company.

Li: Huh? What do you mean?

Cell: There's four other people in the room. I don't envy you.

Li: Well, why does Vegeta get his own room?

Cell: He's got the second-highest power level. Well, third-highest. Goku's obsessed with the couch.

Vegeta: Besides, if anyone challenges me, I'll turn them into a smoking pile of ashes!

Li: So I have to sleep with a mass murderer and a bunch of girls?!

Cell: Hey, whatever turns you on. No one's here to judge you, kid. You don't have to be evil to have weird, sick fantasies.

Li: What?! I didn't-

Cell: Don't deny your true feelings. We all have our addictions. I, for example, am addicted to absorbing people. It's not healthy, but they sure taste great going down.

Reenie: You taste them...with your tail?

Cell: Sure! Don't you...oh. None of you have tails...

Hotaru: Some people are TRYING to eat here...

Cell: If you had a tail, it'd be much easier. Allow me to demonstrate. Any volunteers?

[Everyone backs away nervously from Cell.]

Cell: Cowards. And most of you call yourself villains!

* * * * *

Reenie's Interview

Guy: So who are you really after, Heero or Li?

Reenie: Well, Li, I guess. Heero seems to be attached to Yugi, for some reason.

Guy: So what do you like about Li?

Reenie: He's really cute, and he's actually human, unlike most of the others.

Guy: But aren't you and the other Scouts superhuman?

Reenie: I guess. But that only means that I can kick his butt if he breaks my heart.

Guy: What if he uses his magic on you?

Reenie: What magic? And why are you in a full-body cast?

Guy: Yugi made me jump out of a window. Li's a CardCaptor.

Reenie: Is that a fancy word for blackjack dealer?

Guy: Yeah, if you're an idiot.

[Reenie transforms into Sailor Mini Moon and knocks Guy out with a judo kick.]

* * * * *

11:54 PM

[Li is still trying to fall asleep in his strange surroundings when someone steps on his arm.]

Li: Hey!

Reenie: (clamps a hand over his mouth) Shh! Don't you know Heero gets trigger happy when he wakes up in the middle of the night?

Li: Um...no, I just got here today.

Reenie: Oh, I get it. You're having trouble falling asleep. I had that problem when I first got here. The solution is to sleep with someone that makes you feel comfortable.

Li: No offense, but that sounded like a pick-up line.

[Reenie slips into his sleeping bag.]

Reenie: Whatever gave you that idea?

Li: ...I think I need something to drink. (starts to get up)

[Reenie beans him over the head with her locket, then pulls him close.]

Reenie: See? You're asleep already!

Hotaru: No, he's unconscious.

Reenie: Same thing!

[Outside of the apartment, a huge but silent mobile suit materializes out of thin air. It pauses by the window, then fades into the shadows of night. Minutes later, a teenage boy slips into the window and sneaks into the kitchen for a midnight snack.]

Extra Disclaimer: Li belongs to CLAMP/Nelvana, Tenchi belongs to Pioneer.

Who is this mysterious new visitor? Why do people keep coming to his apartment? What are Tenchi & Serena doing in that bedroom? What are Reenie & Li doing in that sleeping bag? Find out soon. Well, maybe...