Digimon Fan Fiction ❯ Digimon High ❯ Tai, Sports, the 40-hour Famine and Suicide...: Joe's Story ( Chapter 8 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

In the Staff room, Joe was reading the newspapers and Yolei was reading a phamplet

Matt: Hey, Tai, want to go for a drinking session...

Tai: Not today, Matt.

Matt: Look, it has been a tridition since last week, even though I missed the first one...

Tai: I'm on edge, but I'll be there...it's just that I'm nervous about this soccer game
today...

Matt: I know, I know, if there's any constellation, I have been trying to reach you all day...

Tai: That's the problem with this staff, we should be trying to reach for each other...I
mean, look at Yolei.*pointing at Yolei talking to Joe* She doesn't know what is at stake
here...

Matt: Everythings at stake here, a place in the finals is one and next is the school's
reputation is on the line and not to mention...gulp. *Matt holds his stomach*

Tai: Oh, come on, you're a good friend Matt.

Tai helps Matt out of the Staff room...

*

Digimon High: Episode 8: Tai, Sports, the 40-hour Famine and Suicide...: Joe's Story

Staring:
Sora as the Ruthless and Ambitious "Vice" Principal cause Mr.Fujiyama's permanently on leave
Matt as the Carefree, Honest and Freely offered Teacher that is a Music/Computers Teacher
Tai as the Sports Teacher who is undecided whether he's gay or not
Cody as the Drama Teacher that seems to be diffrent and more weird and artistic
Kari as the Libarian that is sometimes a Teacher...most of the time
Yolei as the Polotics Teacher that wants's Romance
TK as the English/Literature Teacher that thinks he's cool
Joe as the Science/Math's teacher that's a weakling
Izzy as the Mute Maintanence man that is always an idiot

By PikaFlash Tai

Disclaimers: All characters, cast, crew and any ideas in this fic belong to their
respective owners...this fic is inspired by the new Australian comedy, Sit down Shut up...

Summary: Thanks to Yolei, Half of Tai's Soccer Team is on a 40-hour famine, casuing Tai to
mess himself up. Also, Matt gives of a new English school motto to remove the previous
Korean Motto. And currently, Joe has plans to take his own life...

*

In Sora's office...

Joe enters the office...

Joe: Sora, I'm sorry to barge in like this, but I would say that in your best intrests that
you should find a new science and maths teacher...someone who can start in the next couple
of weeks...

Sora: Can I ask why?

Joe: Oh, yes, of course...it's a simple reason why...I'm prepared to take my own life. I may
do it either at the end of this week or the beginning of next, but once I finish Calculus with
my Grade 12s...

Sora: It would have been easier if you had done it two weeks ago!!! We have the silly hat day
and the 40-hour Famine and next week is Glottony week...if you could just put it just at the
end of the Term, it would be good by an administrative point of view.

Joe: Ok, I'll try...

In the staffroom, the teachers were standing around, and Sora walks in...

Sora: Alright, Teachers, looks like Principal Fujiyama will be away for another 2 weeks...his
stigmata has been quite servere, so I'll be continuing as acting principal. Firstly, staff
dressing has declined in that area...

Cody started to grab a large prop...

Sora: Not you, Cody.

Cody resumes his normal stuffs...and TK enters the Staffroom in a Biker's outfit...

Sora: TK, care to explain why you're in that outfit?

TK: Well, I'm a cyclist and this outfit cuts down in wind resistance...and lately, female
resistance too...

Sora: But why are you teaching in this, TK?

TK: Well, boss, at the end of the day, I want to get home as quick as possible as I have a
half-an-hour break during lunch and it's not crazy to put the suit on and ride home at
10 pass 3...

Sora: TK, School doesn't end until 3:30...and if you continue to wear inapporiate attire, you
will not only lost your job, but your basic human rights.

TK: Ok. So the bike's alright?

Sora: Anyway, Matt, you have a new suggestion to the School Motto?

Matt: Well, I have found a good English Motto since our last Korean motto failed...this motto
will bring us to the elite standards...with the help of TK since he's fluent in English, the
motto is "Accept your Limits, Embrace Failure"...

TK: Accept your Limits, Embrace Failure...

Cody: I could use that in my drama classes for their vocal warmup...

Kari: I think it's pathetic.

Yolei: I was told that the motto would show the School's opposition to Plastic bags?

Matt: That's the great thing about it! It's all in there. I heard great english mottos my
father has penned and this is the best he has ever penned.

Kari: Surely there should be a better one?

Matt: There was one chinese one from TK, but was rejected.

Yolei: Can we hear it?

Matt: Ok, it says, "quanbu kucunpin de qu, shoushi daishou" which means "All stock must go,
clearence sale."

Sora: But that was taken off the list...

TK: But it sounds nice thanks to the rolling of the tounge...

Sora: Joe, what do you think?

Joe: Well, I think that "after 15 years of marriage, I have a wife that sleeps like a whore".
And I don't know any other languages for that...

Sora: It's decided then, Izzy will paint in the new motto. Tai, you have an announcement,
make it short since we're pressed for time and there are people disintrested.

Tai: Well, there is the return of Wormmon for the soccer team. As long as I keep those Grade
10s away from him, he will become the best player of the team. He is a freak and must be
nutured like a poppy.

Kari: Well, I detest sport and I'm off to clean the toilets...

Sora: Since Izzy's painting the school motto on the sign, you will have to be there slicing
oranges and cleaning their boots...*as Kari was about to leave*...after you clean the toilets.

Outside the school, Izzy was painting the new motto with a big brush on a small school
embelm of the Highton View High sign...

In the hallway...Yolei was giving out the 40-hour famine lists to teachers Yolei walks to
TK...

Yolei: TK, here's the list of students that are on the 40-hour famine...

TK: Yolei, I just want to say that I have broken up with my 4-year relationship with Jun...

Yolei: Oh, I'm so sorry.

TK: Yeah, ever since she found out about my girlfriend. Anyway, that freed up my monday night
and...

Yolei: TK, I don't have time...just take the list.

TK: You know what, Yolei? You wanted to ask me out on a date...don't worry, just relax...

Yolei: TK, I'm not intrested.

TK: Well, neither am I. But we can even it out...

TK walks off and then Tai walk down the stairs...

Yolei: Here are the students in the 40-hour famine.

Tai: What? The 40-who?

Yolei: The students can only drink barley water and they may be lertagic at certain times.

Tai: Oh Sweet Jesus no...Wormmon, you witless moron!!!

Yolei: What's the problem?

Tai: Wormmon is the only Digimon that has legs the equal length and can kick the ball high and
now he's going to be useless.

Yolei: It's a worthy cause, Tai...

Tai: You are meddling with powers you cannot possibally comprehend.

In the school field soccer/change rooms...the team was doing their warmups...

Tai: That's good. Sit down. Now, I'm going to be honest with you boys, after 7 years of
coaching in sport, I have that raw gut feeling that...you boys are absolutely going to be
flogged today...I understand that since the beginning of the year, you have been going
out...only to be trashed...well today, you are to play soccer like you never played before.
Half-decent. Now, I heard that some of you are on the 40-hour famine, like Wormmon, I
understand, but if you get sluggish, get outrunned by your opponent or basically STUFF
THINGS UP, I will SPEW UP! I cannot accept it! I go out there and I WILL SPEW UP!!!! Now go
have fun...

The Digimon walk out of the room...

Back to Izzy at the signboard, a soccerball landed next to Izzy and a Tentomon picks up the
ball but Izzy splattered paint from his brush onto Tentomon's sweater...as Tentomon runs
off scared by Izzy's attitude...

Back at the school hallway, Yolei was talking to Gatomon and Patamon...and Joe enters to go
to the water cooler...

Yolei: I know, Gatomon, that you and Patamon are in a very caring loving relationship and I
don't mind if you do it at the back of my class as long as it doesn't disturbs anyone...but
Mr. Kido's class is very diffrent and I can't stop him...

Joe heard his name...

Yolei *whispering*: I'm sorry if he shifted you off. You see, Joe is suffering from a maritial
relationship problem and he's suffering from a mid-life crisis. I suggest you don't do it in
front of him...

As Patamon and Gatomon walks away, Joe walks up to Yolei...

Yolei: Don't worry, Joe, the students are very caring and symphatetic...

Yolei pats her hand on Joe's shoulders and walks away...

In Cody's classes...the students were breathing slowly with Cody...

Cody: Alright, class, relax. *The class relaxed* Thank you for those 3 hours of silence.
After lunch, we will be reciting the new English motto, "Accept your Limits, Embrace Failure"
and it will fill this afternoon and next week...

Outside the school, Joe was watching the students play soccer when Matt tossed a soccerball
at Joe...

Matt: So, Joe, want to watch the kids at the field play soccer?

Joe: The only thing less intrest me than sport are the Digimons.

Matt: Joe, those kids are an endless source of joy, energy and vitamin B...now go have a
kick...

Joe: I don't know.

Matt: Just go for it.

As Joe walks to the makeshift goalpost, Sora walks by holding a recorder...

Sora: Note that Joe has taken my advice and is looking forward to the end of the semister. I
have succeed where Principal Fujiyama has failed. Note that my voice is loud and clear.

After Sora left, Joe gives a sign to Matt...and then as the soccer ball flies towards Joe, it
hits Joe in the most sensative part...

Matt: Uhhhh...there's is no other way to put it...that ball hit him right in the genetials.

In the soccer field...

Tai and Kari were standing on the field while Matt just walks in...and Veemon was pulling his
socks up...

Tai: Veemon, wait until the ball's away, then you can put your socks up...

Matt: Hey, Tai, sorry I'm late.

Tai: At least you're here. VEEMON! Go for the ball!!

Matt: Oh, RUBBISH!!!! Don't you see? HAVE A LOOK REF!!! *Matt was yelling at the reffree
running pass Matt* THAT'S ALL I'M ASKING! THAT'S ALL I'M ASKING!!!!! Is it so heard to see?!

A goal is scored...

Tai: Oh great!

Matt: Oh yes! A goal!

Tai: No, that's not our goal. NO MORE OWN GOALS...

Kari: This is pathetic. I'm going...

Tai stops her...

Tai: You're not going anywhere. *picks up a bucket of Oranges* Get slicing.

The reffree blows the whistle for half-time...Kari was dropping a few oranges as the soccer
team ran back to the showers...

Matt: All I'm asking is just look! Just have a look. Open it up...

Back in the staff room...Joe enters the room and Yolei sees Joe...

Yolei: Joe, I'm sorry about talking about your problems within earshot and I hope you forgive
me...

Joe: Well, your apology means nothing to me...but thanks anyway...

Yolei: Try to connect with the students as even some of the seniors have maritial problems of
their own...

Matt walks from the shelf to Joe...

Matt: But we do know that good advice does Joe no good, so he needs to be shown upon. So, I
will sit in in one of his classes...

As Matt was taking Joe out of the staffroom...

Matt: *to Yolei: Don't worry, he's in good hands now...

At Joe's science class...

Matt: Since this is the first time I'm with your class, I will start them off with a joke...

Matt stands at the teacher's desk...

Matt: Hello class, I will start off with a quick joke. The other day I was playing baseball
when the bat crashed through the window. Get it? Ok, now, I have started off this great class,
Joe, it's all yours.

Joe walks to the desk and puts his folders down...

Joe: Well, when a doctor got this phrase, he didn't have much confidnece, so it says,
"I think, therefore I am, I think." HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....ha?

Silence in the class as 15 students stared at Joe...

Matt: You harsh pack of upperty little bastards!!! This little man has given his best and I
know his joke was crap and you wanted more of me after I whipped you up in a frenzy. You
gave him the bugger off tone. And this little little man has been pushed over the edge!!!!

Joe walks to the door...

Joe: I guess that's it then.

Joe walks off...

Back to the sign board, Izzy only painted a quarter of the motto on the emblem when the same
soccer ball landed, Izzy was mad as he takes a knife and punctures the ball and gives it back
to Tentomon...

Back in the staffroom...Tai entered carrying the soccer equiptment...

Yolei: How was soccer, Tai?

Tai: Pretty good...considering that half of the team is striken by famine...you should have
been ashamed for yourself and you have ruined the lives of the kids.

Yolei: Oh, hardly Tai, I didn't invent the famine. It was run on a voluntary basis.

Tai: THEY WERE PUSH!!! They were pushed by someone who want to rip out the very heart of
the school. I hope your friends in hunger land is happy, because back in the real world, the
Highton View soccer team is out of the finals! I hope that sickened you.

As Tai left...Kari and Yolei returned to their crossword puzzle...

Kari: Here's a clue...he's a dickbrain.

In TK's class...

TK: And that's why Shakespear wrote "Romeo and Juliet", and I'll see you next week...

TK rings the bell on his bike and rides out of the classroom...

In Sora's office...

Sora: Joe, I'm pleased to see that you were playing with the students. Don't think that
your efforts weren't appriciated

Joe: Sora, I want you to set up an application immediately because I'm going to end it all as
soon as possible...

Sora: But you were having a great day today...

Joe: Let me explain, today I have found 2 more things I am a complete failure at, stand-up
comedy and sport and I have a brusing to prove of the latter, I simply cannot go on...

Sora: But you have an administrative duty of working here...

Joe: Wait, are you threatening legal action against me if I kill myself?

Sora: No, I'm not going to say that...

Joe: But you are going to.

Sora: Indeed I will. You have a legal obligation. Joe, don't kill yourself. We can't afford
it.

In Matt's classroom...

Matt: So we've had the glass smashed and I called out, "TAXI!!!" and they all look at me and
fell for it. Aw come on, Tai, I thought you like that joke...

Tai: Yes, Matt, it was one of your best and I loved it. Its Yolei. She keeps going on and
on about the bloody famine! She sounds like a bloody feminist.

Matt: But you still love her, don't you?

Tai: She's perfect...so perfect that it makes me...spew up. But I only know how to be rude,
agressive and insulting...

Matt: Just tell her, Tai. You have to be honest with people. If someone's unattractive, I'll
just tell him. If someone's not slim as I want them to be, I will open up. Look, if those
kids are ugly, they have the right to know! Just tell her you love her, Tai. Do it now.

Tai: Alright, I will do it.

Matt: I disagree...I mean your future happiness is at stake here...but just do it.

Tai: Alright, I will go. Thanks Matt...

After Tai left Matt's classroom...

Matt: That's not true. *opens a can of beer*

In the staffroom...Tai walks in and sees Yolei...

Tai: Yolei.

Yolei: Yes, Tai?

Tai couldn't say a world...

Yolei: Yes? Don't be afraid.

Tai slowly raised his hand and breathing hevily as he clenches his hand into a fist...and
then brought out his middle finger...

Yolei: I see...

Tai walks out of the staffroom...

Outside the staffroom, Tai was calmed down, resting on a wall for a while until he saw his
soccer players, Gomamon and Veemon and he changes his mood...

Tai: *Angrilly* You see what you reduced me to with your insipid BRAND OF SOCCER!!!!!

Tai walks off leaving a confused Gomamon and Veemon...