Digimon Fan Fiction ❯ Venom of Love ❯ Bad Thoughts ( Chapter 2 )

Venom of Love

Part Two: Bad Thoughts

By KellyQ

I can hear voices saying that I was going to die. I don't want to die, not when the Digital-world needs to be saved! How ironic that I'm actually worried about something. Okay I admit that I can be a little harsh sometimes ....

Happy Now!

The thing is that if I let people get to close to me ... they'll be taken away from me or know how weak I really am. I sometimes wondered why the others cared so much especially Takuya. I thought by now that he would get a clue that I hate him!

Why do I hate him you ask?

Hate him for trying to know me

Hate him for that charming personality

Hate him for tying to act cute

I just hate him for just being Takuya!

Why is it that he can annoy me so much? I don't know. Even though I wish I knew.

I can hear voices in the darkness and one of them is Takuya. It's hard to make out what he's saying but he sounds so sad and scared. Sorry to disappoint you but it's not going to work on me!

I started to shiver when his voice started to fade. Wait! I didn't mean it! No .... I started to feel really cold and my throat felt like it was on fire.

************

Takuya held Kouji close as they walked. I'm not going to give up on you, he thought, not when Tomoki needs the too of us! The two of us ... Takuya looked down his eyes distant, all I wanted was to be his friend. Why couldn't he see that? Why couldn't we be friends.

A single tear escaped from his right eye and landed on Kouji's worm forehead. That's all I ever wanted ... was to be his friend or ... maybe ... no! I can't think like that! He hates me ... but I'm not going to give up!

"Takuya ... are you okay?" Tomoki asked in a small voice.

"Huh, oh, I'll be okay."

The young boy looked ahead knowing that the older boy was lying through his teeth. Why do they hate each other so much. I wish they could just get along with each other. I know that Takuya likes Kouji but doesn't want to admit it .... I wish there was a way to help them .... Tomoki thought.

They both walked into the building that looked abounded .... the whole village looked deserted. Takuya laid Kouji down and gathered enough cloth to cover his shaking body. Izumi watched with a worried look, Takuya has changed since Kouji was hit, he must be really worried about him ... I would be too if I .... wait ... hmmm ... I wonder ....

"Takuya .... can I talk to you out side?" She asks.

"Go ahead .... yell at me ...."

"Takuya," Izumi said from behind, "this isn't any more your fault than it is ours."

*********

I lay there shivering hearing Izumi and Takuya talking about something that it wasn't his fault and she's right it's not your fault it was mine .... for not paying attention. I wanted to prove that I was better than him ...

"Yea .... but you're not the one who he hates."

Takuya will you just stop! I don't ... hate ... you ...

"Come on, Takuya ... he doesn't hate you ..."

"What do you know! You never had someone look down on you ... call you mean names or look at you as if you where nothing!"

Those words hit me .... I ... I had no idea that I was causing so much pain to you ...

"I know that Kouji yells at you ..."

"Of course he yells at me! He hates me! He's probably wishing that it was me right now dieing instead of him!"

Stop it, Takuya!! Just then I hard what sounded like skin hitting skin and a thud, that when I felt a gloved hand on mine.

"I can't believe you would say that!"

Man, I never heard sound Izumi so pissed and I bet Takuya has either ...

"Takuya ...."

"Thanks Izumi ..."

************

Izumi helped him onto his feet she could still see that his eyes where still distant.

"I'm sorry .... for being a wuzz ...."

"I know that you're just worried about Kouji." Izumi said with a smile on her face.

"Yes. We know that you care about him ...."

"I ... I .. need time to think ..."

Junpei was about to step closer when Takuya turned saying that he needed be alone. The other boy nodded his head as he walked out. He really wanted to tell the others that he loved Kouji but if told them they would kick him off the team not wanting to see him ever again.

"You love him don't you." Izumi said from behind.

*********

I watched him tense up when I said that as he lowers his head. I know that I hit something and I sometimes don't mean to. He can piss me off sometimes but I do care about him like a big brother just like Tomoki.

"You wouldn't understand ...."

"Takuya, all I know is that there is someone who needs you right now." I said trying to smile.

"Yea. Even if we find the antidote he'll just hate me even more ..."

"Not if you tell him the truth."

"The truth?"

He turns to my direction and the first thing I saw was tears and great pain in his eyes. I bit my lip. Now what am I going to say, I know I did enough damage for one day. He then fronds threw his tears.

"Why are you being nice to me all of a sudden?"

"We are a team aren't we?" I asked walking closer to him, "now come on. What happened to Takuya Kanbara ... the spunky boy that was care free?"

"Izumi ...." he finally says looking down at his right, "I just need to be alone."

"If that's what you want." I sighed still feeling the guilt in my heart.

*******

They don't understand. How I feel about Kouji. None of them do. When I first met him, my cell-phone rang. I looked at it wondering why anyone would be calling me. No one the Max seemed to using theirs, I looked ahead to see a boy about my age.

It was weird because his cell-phone was ringing the same time mine did thus fancier than mine. It was one of those ones that folds up. As I got a better look at Kouji there was more to him than I realized.

As we got to know each other, I noticed that Kouji's heart was starting to soften but it's taken along time. Sometimes I lay awake wondering why he's so distant. I wanted so many times to ask him why he acts like we're going to hurt him but it's so hard to even get near him sometimes.

Oh Kouji .... I just wish you give me a chance. I'll give you one too .... if you let me. I want to know you, make you happy, make you smile thus it hurts knowing that I can't do any of those things.

"Come on, Takuya, you better get in here before the foods all gone!" Izumi yells.

I sighed turned and looked over my shoulder to look at the moon again. I'm not going to give up, Kouji!

"Takuya!!"

"I'm coming! Hold on to your horse's!!" I yelled back.

Just at the brief moment it felt good to yell. It felt part of me was lifted off of me.

"Takuya!"

TO BE CONTINUED ....

Once again! Another stupid chapter! And thank you for reading.