Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Kuro's Escape ❯ Conflict ( Chapter 7 )

Pain. It was his first conscious thought. Pain. Lots of pain. Not as bad, though. He took my tail… because I asked him to. So I wouldn't hurt so badly. But why? Mas… Vegeta is… I don't understand what is going on. Why he keeps chasing me. He said he loves me… Vegeta doesn't know how to love.

A fact that was immediately denied. YES HE DOES! Isn't he taking care of me? Isn't he? Didn't he take the pride of the Saiyans just to help me heal? Isn't he cooking for me? Letting me sleep in his bed? Didn't he come and rescue me? He loves me! He said so - and he's showing it the only way he knows how!

The body on the bed twitched as some of the pain made itself more apparent, sore limbs shifting to try and relieve pressure on painful areas. It seemed nothing helped, and a small whine escaped. The blankets were stripped back, a cool cloth applied to the fever-hot body. The edge of a cup insinuated itself between parched lips, cool moisture trickling in to be swallowed.

His thoughts were laced with wonder. He's taking care of me. The wonder was squelched. He'll just hurt me again… just like before. All he wants is my body. How many times has he proven that to me? How many times sent me away when I needed him, and he didn't want me around? Or called me to service when I most needed to be alone. I'm a fuck toy for the prince… nothing more.

He found himself making a vehement denial. That's not true! He's so gentle! Vegeta's never gentle, except with those he cares about! Remember how careful he was with Trunks when he was a baby? Of Bulma when she was dying? How gentle he was? He's protective of those he loves, and he's protective right now! You can't deny that! Besides, I never told him I needed him. Never. I should have. I do need him. I need him so badly it hurts more than my body does.

Anger. He wasn't there when I needed him most. He spurned me. Turned me away. Turned me into… this.

More denial. No… it's not true!

A plea, demanding knowledge. Then how did it happen?

More little, panting whimpers, another drink offered. A change of position that flared agony throughout his body, so horrible he couldn't scream, and then the cool cloth wiping him down again, easing the pain.

The plea was answered quietly, the mental tone firm now. I couldn't deal with what they wanted. I couldn't deal with being… alone. Unwanted. That's what happened. I ran away, when I should have stood up for myself. I ran away instead of standing my ground and explaining. I ran away, and I said I was dead. But I'm not dead. I was never dead. I was hiding. Running away into my own mind. Running away, trying to pretend it didn't matter that they couldn't see me right in front of them. But I couldn't run from my son when he needed me. I couldn't hide all the time anymore. I had to save him. I had to help him. I had to live again. I'm not dead, I never was. Just… I had to hide.

Scoffing at himself. That's not what happened. I had to be strong. I had to live. I had to be able to withstand the abuse, the rapes, the drugs. I had to…

The sentence was finished quietly. Hide? Keep my power hidden so I couldn't be found? I couldn't do anything right.

Sharp anger and warped pride fueled a reaction. I made a good whore. A good one! People came back. Vegeta kept me for years.

Gently, as if unwilling to argue with himself. He still wants me. But he wants me to be his, not a whore. He wants me to want to be his, of my own will. He wants me to love him… doesn't he know I do?

More anger. He revealed me in front of everyone simply so he wouldn't have to share me. He fired me, then chased me down when I went back to my own life! I had a life before him. It wasn't perfect, but it was mine!

A flare of righteous anger. It was horrible! It was degrading and unworthy of my Saiyan heritage! It was unworthy of me, even if I did feel like I deserved it. I didn't! I didn't deserve to be raped. I didn't deserve to be beaten and whipped. I never deserved needles, and drugs. I didn't do anything to deserve any of that!

Mocking. I couldn't do anything else, so I became a whore. What difference does it make if the beatings and stuff was deserved? It was just part of the job. Nothing personal.

Sorrow and pain now filled the voice. Nothing personal! Look at the scars! I remember the first one. I remember it well. I was too pretty. Too delicate. Too… sensitive. He cut the whip across my face… and then painted on it with acid! That's not something I will ever forget… I can't. I know how to cover that scar up, but I will carry it all my life. I will see it every time I look in the mirror. I remember the one on my cock. That was for releasing before I had permission. How long… it took so long to heal. Longer than any of the others, because they kept using me.

The equivalent of a mental shrug. And I got used to it. I got used to the beatings. It wasn't anything I couldn't deal with. Nothing I couldn't live through.

The sense of despair. It hurt. A lot. I ran further away. I didn't want to believe there was anyone out there who liked to hurt people so badly. Humans so depraved they enjoyed inflicting that kind of pain on others. I thought only monsters like Frieza and Cell… only monsters could do something like that. But these were people… people I had died to protect.

Again, the tone became mocking. They sure showed their appreciation. I deserved it, though.

The reply was sad, nearly sorrowing. I didn't. I know that now. I didn't deserve to be treated the way I was at home, and I didn't deserve what happened when I left home. I didn't deserve what made me leave home.

A flat statement, with no hint that it was incorrect. Vegeta.

A resigned agreement followed. Vegeta.

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Goku: I don't get it.

Vegeta: I do.

Goku: Really?

Vegeta: You're trying to convince yourself you're worth something.

Goku: I am!

Vegeta: …

Goku: You kissed me.

Vegeta: I'll thank you not to bring that up again.

Goku: *very small voice* Oh. Okay.

Muse: *appears, examines chapter, nods*

Jewel: I think that means he considers it properly confusing.

Vegeta: I thought it was pretty obvious.

Muse: *lifts single eyebrow, examines paper he holds*

Vegeta: *narrows eyes, steps in front of Kakarot*

Goku: Ummm…

Vegeta: You're not using that bunny.

Muse: *smirks, shows paper to Jewel*

Jewel: YES! MINOTAUR APPROVED!

Vegeta: Why does that not sound good?

Goku: *looks at paper* Oooo… I get to do THAT? *glomps Muse*

Muse: *smirks at Vegeta's outraged expression*